SUFFERING OF NINKO -- DVD Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 7/26/18

 

For those with a taste for the unusual, SUFFERING OF NINKO (2016) should prove a delectable, perhaps even sumptous treat. While hardly the nuttiest Asian supernatural film set in ancient Japan that I've ever seen, it easily ranks as one of my more keenly unusual movie-watching experiences.

The establishing shots alone let us know that we're in for a beautifully rendered film by first time feature director (and writer and producer and editor) Norihiro Niwatsukino, whose credits on the project mark it as an intensely personal vision.

Set in Japan's Edo period (around the 16th century or so), the story begins in a monastery where young monk Ninko (Masato Tsujioka) is the most ardent and hardworking of all his peers. But for all his virtue and spiritual purity, he suffers from a terrible burden--he is incredibly, insanely irresistible to every woman he comes into contact with.

At first this is depicted with subtle hints of lighthearted comedy despite the film's solemn tone, with Ninko's excursions into a nearby village with his brothers to beg for alms descending into chaos as all the women in the area converge upon the group to grab, grope, drool over, and attempt to seduce the hapless Ninko with every feminine trick in their book and a few that are clearly made up on the spot.

Ninko's ordeal is deftly portrayed by showing us how his zen meditation sessions first serve as a source of peace and spiritual comfort but gradually evolve into furious psycho-sexual fever dreams that have him writhing in sexual agony before finally driving him out of his mind.

This sequence is the most surreal of the film and is enhanced by Edo-inspired drawings and animations (which recur throughout the film to add to its old Japanese storytelling style) and an unusual rendition of Ravel's "Bolero" played with traditional Japanese instruments.

Here we also get one of the first hints that Ninko is being haunted and perhaps stalked by a powerful supernatural female entity with long black hair, whom we see dancing seductively behind a bland-expression mask.

After recovering his senses, Ninko is ordered to set off on a journey of self-discovery to confront his problems and deal with them head on.  The narrative really gets going when he meets a mercenary ronin named Kanzo (Hideta Iwahashi) and the two of them are hired by local villagers to hunt down an evil sorceress, Yama-onna (Miho Wakabayashi), who seduces men with her irresistible sexuality and drains them of their lifeforce, leaving only lifeless, mummified husks.

We've seen hints of Yama-onna appearing teasingly to Ninko throughout the film, as though she senses his own sexual power and sees it, and him, as a challenge.  Ninko, meanwhile, suffers even more when it occurs to him that he may in fact be some kind of inhuman sexual creature himself.

Kanzo, the roguish swordsman, looks upon all this as an amusing (he likes Ninko) and profitable challenge to his skills.  Writer and director Norihiro Niwatsukino brings them all together for a surprising and, in some ways, exhilarating climax (in more ways than one) in which the film's narrative subtleties and eye-filling supernatural wonders intertwine. 

Old-fashioned storytelling blends with modern sex and violence to create a unique viewing experience in SUFFERING OF NINKO.  Those indulging in this enticing buffet of ancient Japanese delights will be well served.

TECH SPECS
Running Time: 70 mins.
Genre: Drama/Comedy
Aspect Ratio: 1.85:1
Audio: Stereo
Language: Japanese w/English Subtitles
Street Date: August 14, 2018
DVD SRP: $19.95

SUFFERING OF NINKO -- DVD Review by Porfle

REDLINE -- DVD Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 12/27/11

 

Sizzling with supercharged action, the simple plot of director Takeshi Koike's sci-fi anime REDLINE (2009) serves as a backdrop for some of the most mindblowing, audacious cartoon animation to ever blaze its way across the screen. 

The pre-titles sequence features a qualifying "Yellowline" race in the desert that already makes the podrace from THE PHANTOM MENACE look like a frog-jumping competition.  We meet J.P., who resembles a brawny Ricky Nelson with a skyscraper pompadour and, thanks to his crooked partner Frisbee, has a reputation for fixing races.  Sure enough, Frisbee's in deep with the mob on this one and sabotages J.P.'s car near the finish line, landing him in the hospital.

When some of the qualifiers for the Redline drop out, J.P.'s back in the game along with his heartthrob Sonoshee, a lovely lass with more interest in machines than men.  But the location for the race turns out to be Roboworld, a militaristic society whose leaders are so opposed to the competition taking place on their world (and possibly having some of their military secrets broadcast galaxy-wide) that they declare all-out war against the racers.  In order to win this one, J.P. will have to battle it out against ruthless drivers (including Sonoshee), the entire military force of Roboworld, and perhaps even his own sidekick Frisbee.
 


Fans of non-CGI animation should have a ball reveling in this 100% hand-drawn visual feast, whose creators invested seven years and 100,000 drawings in its making.  Each frame of this dazzling tribute to old-school cartoon wizardry is as insanely detailed as panels from the more extravagant underground comix of the 60s and 70s, and unlike digital cartoons you can see the artists' and animators' hands in every painstaking detail. 

The dynamic, hard-edged drawing style, a eye-pleasing mix of both the futuristic and retro, yields a wealth of beautifully-rendered character designs and backgrounds that are then brought to vivid life.  Surreal touches, such as J.P.'s gravity-defying hairdo and an endless parade of grotesque aliens, rub shoulders with the hard-edged yet wildly-imaginative hardware of cars, spaceships, and other machinery. 

The over-the-top character design (by co-writer Katsuhito Ishii, who also worked on the anime sequence from KILL BILL, VOL. 1 and helped create REDLINE's outstanding soundtrack) goes well with the film's larger-than-life cast of oddballs.  These include J.P.'s multi-armed canine mechanic Pops, the towering cyborg Machine Head, and the various other racers whose bizarre appearance and unique personalities keep things interesting.  Even the crowd scenes are filled with a vast array of colorful "extras."
 


While the plot busies itself with various concerns such as J.P.'s wooing of the reluctant Sonoshee and Frisbee's conflict of loyalties between him and the mob, REDLINE roars to life during its many spectacular action sequences.  The imposing Colonel Votron and his Roboworld army launch a full-scale attack on the racers that begins when they leave the mothership and attempt to land their shuttle vehicles on the planet.  The race itself is a non-stop series of thrilling setpieces which lead to the activation of the Roboworld president's ace in the hole, an out-of-control behemoth known as "Funky Boy" who proceeds to destroy everything in sight.  

The DVD from Anchor Bay's "Manga" label is in 1.78:1 anamorphic widescreen with Dolby 5.1 and 2.0 soundtracks in both Japanese and English, with English subtitles.  Extras consist of a 24-minute making-of featurette and the film's trailer. 

Thrilling, funny, and endlessly watchable, REDLINE is chock-full of some of the most visually-stunning racing action and futuristic warfare ever created for an animated film.  Best of all, it's a return to the glory days of hand-drawn animation which, in the words of its creators, offers something new by doing things the old way again. 

REDLINE -- DVD Review by Porfle

ROBOGEISHA -- DVD Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 11/3/10

 

Every once in a while I come across a movie that's pure brain candy, which is the best way I can think of to describe the utterly demented ROBOGEISHA (2009).  To say that it's like a live-action cartoon doesn't even scratch the surface of how deliriously nutty this movie is.

We've seen geishas popping up all over the place in Japanese action cinema these days, but few can compare to these deadly and unpredictable robo-geishas.  Bristling with built-in weaponry, they leap into action with a dazzling array of chest guns, saber tongues, napalm wigs, armpit swords, ass swords, and, in one case, a mouth that turns into a buzzsaw.  But the most startling and unexpected of all, according to their hapless targets, seem to be the dreaded ass stars.  As a dying yakuza warlord complains after receiving a faceful of them:  "Something like this is just...in a sense, it's really unfair."

Kidnapped and turned into cyborg geishas against their will, they act as bodyguards and assassins for Kenzan Kageno and his son Hikaru, a pair of power-mad steel tycoons who are building a giant super-bomb with which they plan to take over Japan.  Into their ancient castle lair come the timid, unsuspecting Yoshie (Aya Kiguchi) and her cruel older sister Kikuyakko (Hitomi Hasebe), a beautiful geisha with romantic designs on Hikaru.  But he's only interested in Yoshie once he discovers that anger transforms her into a super-strong warrior.


 

After Yoshie defeats Kikuyakko in a forced battle, she's delighted with the positive attention she receives and submits to her captors while her older sister is reduced to menial servitude.  Kikuyakko gets fed up with this pretty quick, however, and undergoes body reconstruction which turns her into a cyborg with a built-in chest machine gun among other modifications.  While the sisters compete for status among the robo-geishas, Yoshie encounters a group of distraught family members who are planning to rescue their loved ones from the Kagenos.  She comes to her senses and decides to help them wage war against the bad guys, including her own sister. 

Scenes of the robo-geishas being dispatched to seduce and eliminate the Kagenos' political and business enemies brought to mind, of all things, AIP's old "Dr. Goldfoot" movies in which Vincent Price creates an army of exploding bikini-clad robot assassins.  I was also reminded of the "Pink Panther" films during a side-splittingly funny early scene with Yoshie accidentally causing great embarrassment to Kikuyakko as she entertains Hikara and his friends.  Some of the other humor and bizarre situations are reminiscent of the similarly ultra-strange BIG MAN JAPAN, which also made good use of CGI to create some delightfully surrealistic visuals.


 

What really helps make the film so funny, though, is its deadpan mock-seriousness.  The melodramatic conflicts between sisters Yoshie and Kikukyakko are as heartwrenchingly maudlin and emotional as the soap operas of yore, and are played so straight that its almost painful.  Here, the lead performances are perfectly in tune with the screenplay's sensibility.  "I am she who fells festering evil through machinery, the clockwork courtesan," Yoshi intones with solemn conviction right before unleashing her wig napalm.

Much of the other humor comes not from "funny" lines, but from various people stating the obvious with a kind of stunned disbelief.  One victim of the "ass stars" mutters:  "It can't be...they came out of...their asses..."  Seconds away from being sliced to ribbons while in the grip of the buzzsaw-mouthed geisha, another man groans:  "I'm feeling...a lot of stress!  This kind of stress...really hits you later!"

Best of all are Cay Izumi and Asami (who should be receiving my marriage proposal just as soon as I can find somebody to translate it) as the gleefully kill-crazy GobliSquadron, a pair of gorgeous babes with dazzling battle skills and really bad attitudes who give ROBOGEISHA some of its liveliest moments.  Wearing scary masks with long, "erect" noses similar to those worn by the Droogies in Kubrick's A CLOCKWORK ORANGE, they get the movie off to a rousing start as they take on the sword-wielding bodyguards of a political candidate marked for death.  In another scene that had me howling with "WTF?", they shield Hikaru from a vengeful former lover by showering her with their highly-corrosive secret weapon, "Hell's Breast Milk."

While the middle section lags a bit, things really go over-the-top as we head into the final clash between Yoshie and the Kagenos.  Having suffered a major setback (she gets blown up), Yoshie is rebuilt with modifications she isn't even aware of herself ("Incredible!  I didn't know I could turn into a tank!") just as Hikaru unveils his secret weapon, the Giant Robot Castle.  While this towering monstrosity threatens Japan, Kikuyakko attacks Yoshie with new-and-improved cyborg abilities of her own in a climactic free-for-all.

The direction by Noboru Iguchi, who also wrote the script, is a prime example of controlled chaos.  Even the shaky-cam and whiplash pans and zooms are done with the precision of an animated film.  Not too flashy but endlessly kinetic and creative, the look of ROBOGEISHA is colorful and stylish. 

The DVD from Funimation Entertainment is 16:9 with soundtracks in English 5.1 surround and Japanese stereo.  Besides the trailers for this and other Funimation releases, there's a fifteen-minute short film called "Geishacop: Fearsome Geisha Corps--Go to Hell" which is a spin-off of the main feature and is so violent, bizarre, and perverse that you just have to see it to believe it.

After such a gushing recommendation, I should probably take a moment to stress that ROBOGEISHA definitely isn't for everyone.  It's a weird movie and you have to be a little weird yourself in order to enjoy it. As for me, I've already seen it three times!

 

ROBOGEISHA -- DVD Review by Porfle

THE FOREST -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle

 

Originally posted on 4/4/16

 

Try getting lost in a forest, and you'll understand what a scary place it can be.  Naturally, it's been the setting for horror films that either pretty much get it right (THE WOODS) or woefully get it wrong (THE EVIL WOODS).

Director Jason Zada's THE FOREST (2016) pretty much gets it right.  In fact, for a movie about a forest in which a forest is the star--namely, the lush, legendary Aokigahara Forest in Japan, in which people are said to lose themselves in order to commit suicide--this one is about as spooky and evocative as such a film can get.

From the moment we see Sara Price (Natalie Dormer, W.E., THE HUNGER GAMES, "Game of Thrones") getting her first psychic premonition that her identical twin sister Jess is in danger in said forest, and immediately flying to Tokyo where the missing sister teaches English, we're already beginning a gradual descent into this film's somber and oppressively ominous mood. 

Not only is an overall ambience of creepiness established early, but Sara hasn't even left her hotel and entered the forest before we're subjected to the first in a series of jump scares that flash-freeze the blood. 

Some of these, as in HOUSE ON HAUNTED HILL (1959), involve frizzy-haired old ladies.  Who, coincidentally, have often been left to die in the forest in years past by families who didn't know what else to do with them. 

Even when THE FOREST isn't goosing us, it's creeping us out in other ways.  Not the least of these is when Sara enters a visitors' center and is left in a room full of dead bodies that have been retrieved from the forest.  When one of them appears to move, is it really happening, or is Sara's mind already playing tricks on her?  This question will be a major concern throughout the story.

Sara meets a handsome Australian journalist named Aiden (Taylor Kinney, ZERO DARK THIRTY) who's about to trek into the woods with an experienced guide, Michi (Yukiyoshi Ozawa), and invites her along if he can include her in the article he's writing.  We share her relief in finding a kindred spirit such as he, but also her misgivings about his motives. (Was that a glint of recognition in his eyes when he first saw her?)

Thus begins the heart of the film's gripping story, replete with the dead bodies of those who have committed suicide, angry and terrifying ghosts who may or may not be real, teasing clues concerning Jess' whereabouts, and Sara's continuing doubts about both Aiden's trustworthiness and her own sanity.  Doubts which we, the viewers, must apprehensively share as things get scarier and scarier and we see it all through her eyes.

THE FOREST establishes an extremely effective fact-based mythology about the "suicide forest" that makes us fear any deviation from the beaten path (from which the main characters must, of course, deviate) and dread the prospect of being left out there all alone in the dark of night. 

It also has a way of deriving supernatural-type scares from even the more realistic situations in which Sara's overactive imagination gets the better of her.  This eventually brings us to a point where potential madness and delusion are far more frightening than ghosts. 

The beautifully-photographed forest locations are richly foreboding, while the Japanese setting with its history of ghost stories and legends adds to the exotic nature of the story. 

The filmmakers really run with this premise--ghosts, dead people, horrifying visions that may or may not be there--and just keep thinking of ways to creep us out with it.  Even when the film is unable to fully maintain its level of sustained fear, it stays interesting enough to keep our attention the whole time. 

Dormer finds just the right note to play Sara, somewhere between anxiety and resignation, while searching for her trouble-prone twin.  Kinney remains jovial but enigmatic as Aiden, and like Sara we're never quite sure of him.  The rest of the cast are good including Eoin Macken ("Merlin") as Sara's concerned husband Rob.

The Blu-ray+Digital HD from Universal Studios Home Entertainment is in 1080p high resolution widescreen with English DTS-HD master audio 5.1.  Subtitles are in English, French, and Spanish.  Extras include the featurette "Exploring 'The Forest'", galleries, storyboards, and an intimate commentary track by director Jason Zada.

With moments that'll have you jumping in your seat and an overall feeling of creeping fear, THE FOREST overcomes even its occasional lapses and a not-quite-satisfying ending (for me, anyway) to succeed as a memorably effective and exceedingly well-made modern horror story. 

THE FOREST -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle

ZEBRAMAN 2: ATTACK ON ZEBRA CITY -- DVD Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 11/13/11

 

If you ever wondered what a cross between Christopher Nolan's THE DARK KNIGHT and Joel Schumacher's BATMAN AND ROBIN might look like, Takashi Miike's ZEBRAMAN 2: ATTACK ON ZEBRA CITY (2010) might come pretty close.  Combining serious dramatic elements with the usual cheeseball stuff found in the more juvenile Japanese superhero adventures (but done on a lavish budget), it's an insanely deadpan seriocomic fantasy romp that works like a charm on both levels.

In the original 2004 film, a mild-mannered school teacher named Andrew Kim (Show Aikawa) assumed the identity of failed TV superhero Zebraman to stop an alien invasion and ended up temporarily gaining his superpowers for real.  Here, he's captured by the evil Kozo Aihara (Guadalcanal Taka) and placed in a centrifuge chamber which splits his good and bad sides into separate entities.  Good Kim now has white hair and amnesia, while his evil half is a black-haired female whom Kozo names Yui and adopts as his daughter.

Fifteen years later, Kim awakens to find himself in a Tokyo that's been renamed Zebra City and is now run by Kozo, with Yui keeping the masses in line as super-sexy pop star Zebra Queen.  Twice a day for five minutes," Zebra Time" allows the skull-faced police force to legally kill anyone, so a wounded Kim ends up in the care of his former pupil Asano, a male nurse devoted to helping Zebra Time survivors.  One of Asano's patients is a little girl, Sumire, still possessed by one of the previous film's aliens, and when Kim comes into contact with her his memory is restored along with his Zebraman powers.  With Kozo and Yui planning to spread Zebra Time throughout the rest of the world, Zebraman must leap into action once again to stop them, confronting his own dark side in the bargain.



First of all, the seriously cute Riisa Naka as Yui is awesome.  She inhabits her character with a vigorous enthusiasm and is wildly flamboyant in her actions and evil facial expressions, not to mention the way she throws herself into the song-and-dance stuff in Zebra Queen's music videos.  Literally the embodiment of evil, her Zebra Queen is stunning to look at and exciting in her evolution from simple bad girl into superpowered villainess reveling in chaos and destruction. 

For me, the film's most effective straight dramatic scene comes when she turns against Kozo in the back of their limosine as smitten lackey Niimi (Tsuyoshi Abe) looks on in wry admiration.  The way Miike builds to this key point in the story, along with the cunningly subtle but menacing musical score and the malevolent glee Naka conveys during Yui's violent outburst, add up to a powerful and rewindable moment.

With all the DARK KNIGHT seriousness with which Kim, Asano, and the rest of the good guys treat the character of Zebraman and his quest to wrest Tokyo from the depths of corruption, the outrageous comedy and over-the-top fantasy elements take on an added richness.  Zebraman's heroic comic-book exploits during the numerous fight scenes are a heady blend of undiluted cheese (including the usual hokey wirework, corny dialogue, etc.) with dazzling design and production values. 

When Zebra Queen unleashes one of the gelatinous green aliens from the first film on Zebra City and it grows to Godzilla-like proportions, leveling skyscrapers and incinerating city blocks with its heat breath, the stage is set for an epic battle brimming with mind-boggling visuals that are rendered with some top-notch CGI work.  Even the most lowbrow sight gags--as when the mammoth alien repels Zebra Queen with a noxious hurricane fart--are treated as high drama, as is the incredibly ridiculous final solution employed by Zebraman against the creature.



Show Aikawa's performance as the befuddled everyman who becomes the grimly-determined and supremely confident Zebraman is right on the money throughout, with the rest of the cast in top form as well.  Much fun is had with Naoki Tanaka's character of Ichiba, who played the title role in a "Zebraman" TV series and fancies himself a match for the real-life bad guys when the trouble begins.  Talented child actress Mei Nagano adds to the film's genuine emotional depth as the alien-possessed Sumire.  Guadalcanal Taka as the comically vile Kozo is especially good in the "creation" sequence, cavorting about his cavernous, Giger-inspired mad laboratory like a crazed Dr. Frankenstein.

The DVD from Funimation is in 1.78:1 widescreen with Dolby 5.1 Japanese soundtrack and English subtitles.  Extras on Disc 2 include the in-depth (almost 90 minutes long) documentary "The Making of 'Zebraman 2: Attack on Zebra City'", "The Making of 'Zebra Queen's Theme' Music Video", five cast and crew interviews, and original trailers and commercials for the film.  (The film comes as a 3-disc Blu-Ray/DVD combo--this review is for the DVD and its extras only.)

Takashi Miike and scriptwriter Kankurô Kudô have created a fascinating dystopian future whose comedic touches make it no less effective as scintillating sci-fi.  While the unabashedly bizarre nature of ZEBRAMAN 2: ATTACK ON ZEBRA CITY will no doubt put off many viewers, those open to such freewheeling weirdness may find it akin to plunging their hands into a cinematic treasure chest and coming up with fistfuls of pure, glittering fun.

ZEBRAMAN 2: ATTACK ON ZEBRA CITY -- DVD Review by Porfle

TRIGUN: BADLANDS RUMBLE -- DVD Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 9/4/11

 

Cliched though they may sound, "rollicking" and "rip-roaring" are pretty good descriptive words for director Satoshi Nishimura's TRIGUN: BADLANDS RUMBLE (2010), an eye-pleasing anime that's bursting at the seams with fast-moving action and comedy.  A feature-length version of the manga by Yasuhiro Nightow and the popular television series, it's a dense conglomeration of sci-fi, steampunk, Westerns, and various other genres with energy and style to burn.

The film opens with hulking outlaw Gasback and his three henchmen robbing a fortress-like bank but then having a falling out over Gasback's tendency to invest all their spoils in bigger and more elaborate robberies, which is his sole motivation.  Before the three traitors can kill him, however, he's rescued by Vash the Stampede, who values all life even more than he values fun, adventure, and donuts.  Unfairly regarded as a villain and bearing a sixty-billion double-dollar price on his head, Vash (known as "The Humanoid Typhoon") is a wanderer who only wants to help people and have a good time. 

Gasback, meanwhile, has patiently waited twenty years for his former allies to rise to positions of wealth and prominence, so that his revenge will be even greater.  After destroying the livelihoods of the first two, he's on his way to Mecca City to bring down Caine, who is now the mega-wealthy owner of the town's massive power plant.  News of Gasback's impending arrival has drawn hundreds of bounty hunters from all over, including the beautiful Amelia who has some unfinished business with him.



Jittery insurance agents Meryl Stryfe and Milly Thompson, old friends of Vash, are also in town to protect Caine's giant bronze statue of himself, which their company has insured for five billion dollars.  And mysterious clergyman Nicholas D. Wolfwood, another of Vash's past acquaintances, shows up as Gasback's current bodyguard, fulfilling a debt to him with the help of his huge cross-shaped rocket gun.

With its sleek character design and detail-packed backgrounds, TRIGUN: BADLANDS RUMBLE is a constant joy to look at.  Along with a colorful vehicular caravan, the bounty hunters travel to Mecca City aboard a huge steamship that hovers across the desert and serves as the setting for some lively encounters between Vash, Amelia, and some troublesome competitors.  The city itself is a clever combination of modern and Old West design, where the main characters engage in an old-fashioned barroom brawl before Gasback's attack sparks a spectacular battle sequence filled with sound and fury.

With so much explosive action going on, the body count in this bullet-riddled but lighthearted tale is practically nonexistent.  Much of the emphasis is on comedy as Vash courts an unwilling Amelia, who is literally allergic to men, while Meryl and Milly work themselves into nervous fits worrying about the fate of Caine's big, gaudy statue. 

Even hardbitten characters like Gasback and the hordes of bounty hunters out for his head contribute to the story's often deadpan-comic atmosphere.  The story isn't all fun, however--surprisingly, things get a little emotional now and then, particularly when we learn of Amelia's tragic origin and at least one of the main good guys bites the dust. 



Before the dust settles over the ravaged Mecca City, the action heads out into the desert as the bounty hunter caravan pursues Gasback in a thrilling sequence heavily inspired by THE ROAD WARRIOR.  Later, a final showdown between the good guys and the bad guy revels in heaping helpings of Spaghetti Western goodness, with Sergio Leone's influence nicely recycled into over-the-top cartoon visuals.  Here, all the various threads of the story are neatly tied up with a satisfying conclusion that extends through the closing credits crawl. 

The DVD from Funimation is in widescreen with English and Japanese Dolby 5.1 sound and English subtitles.  Disc one is the movie and some Funimation trailers.  Disc two contains a number of bonus features including several lengthy, lively cast-and-crew panel discussions at various locations including the film's premiere.  There's also a post-recording short, promotional clips and trailers, and other assorted tidbits.

Like an old Mad Magazine comics panel from the 50s, TRIGUN: BADLANDS RUMBLE is so richly detailed that it bears repeat viewing just to take in everything you missed the first time.  But most of all, this seriocomic burst of creative energy is just a ball to watch.

TRIGUN: BADLANDS RUMBLE -- DVD Review by Porfle

SHIN GODZILLA -- Movie Review by Porfle

 Originally posted on 10/8/16

 

I never was a huge kaiju fan, but I always thought GODZILLA and other Japanese monster movies from Toho Studios were pretty cool when I was a kid.  I remember titles like KING KONG VS. GODZILLA, RODAN, and DESTROY ALL MONSTERS showing at my local theater when they were new and the place being packed with happy, excited kids (we really loved our monster movies back then!) I rarely missed these and other such films as MOTHRA and GAMMERA on television as well.

I did pretty much miss out on the middle period in Japanese monster movie history, namely the updated stuff from the 80s and beyond.  I had the misfortune of seeing the Roland Emmerich/Dean Devlin GODZILLA remake in 1998, the less said about which the better except that it was, in two words, horribly ill-conceived. 

With that in mind, I must say that I found Toho's latest 2016 remake, SHIN GODZILLA (or "Godzilla Resurgence"), to be a welcome throwback to those old-fashioned kaiju epics of my childhood which I recall most fondly.

 

For one thing, even though the giant green lizard is purely a modern-day CGI creation, he's designed to resemble the man-in-a-monster-suit Godzilla of old.  I find this both delightfully nostalgic and somehow just plain right.  He sounds the same too, and his appearance is usually heralded by the familiar strains of his original theme music. 

What I found intriguingly different this time around is that the beast is in a state of accelerated evolutionary flux.  When we first see him, he's a purely amphibious fish-eyed creature--sort of a cross between a turtle and a seahorse--whose intense body heat causes a steam cloud to erupt in Tokyo Harbor and inflict extreme tsunami-style damage on the coastline.  After it makes its way out of the water, it morphs into a being that can exist on land. 

After its initial rampage and a brief return to the sea for its final stage of evolution, the monster returns fully transformed (more or less) into the Godzilla we've always known and loved.  At this point the movie kicks into high gear with scenes of devastation that are absolutely breathtaking and, this time, completely convincing.  (No more cardboard buildings and flimsy pagodas with wind-up toy military vehicles skittering around, as endearing as they were.)

 

In his third of three major appearances, Godzilla lets loose all of his radioactive fury with both heat breath and photon beams from his tail and dorsal fins that slice right through buildings and blow military craft out of the sky. 

There's one sequence in particular in which several skyscrapers surrounding Godzilla are detonated and brought down upon him all at once, resulting in a scene so utterly catastrophic yet realistically rendered that I found it strangely exhilarating.  If you have a sweet tooth for scenes of full-scale destruction, this movie should satisfy it and then some.

That said, SHIN GODZILLA resembles the Godzilla movies of old in another, less positive way--it's often incredibly boring.  Remember all those long, talky scenes they'd always put between the monster action to pad out the movie?  This one has those in abundance, and they're talkier than ever. 

Much of the talk consists of a lot of overwrought political and scientific chatter spouted by an endless succession of uninteresting and resolutely unmemorable characters.  The only two who make any sort of lasting impression are young Mr. Yaguchi (Hiroki Hasegawa), who assembles a crack team of geniuses to figure out how to neutralize the radioactive beast before it has to be nuked along with the rest of Tokyo, and Miss Patterson (Satomi Ishihara), a winsome, headstrong Japanese-American woman acting as liason for the American President.

But even these two characters are too busy yakking about boring stuff (Mr. Yaguchi seems particularly stiff-necked) to develop much interesting character interaction, and the rest of the old fogies do nothing but sit at long tables endlessly gnawing on all the political knots with an almost comical nationalistic fervor.

These scenes with all their rapid-fire exposition really are a calcified bore despite attempts by co-directors Hideaki Anno (EVANGELION) and Shinji Higuchi to make things interesting by keeping the camera moving a lot. 

The only time the non-Godzilla scenes liven up is when the monster's approach throws all of the earlier formality into utter chaos during the mad scramble to evacuate in time.  Some suspense is also generated late in the film with the impending decision whether or not to use nukes as the Americans (natch) and UN are urging the Japanese to do. 

But all of this is forgotten during the three major monster sequences in the film, the third of which begins with 15-20 minutes of the 120-minute running time left and features some of the film's most amazing SPFX including several explosive-laden commuter trains crashing into Godzilla, a missile attack involving jet planes and ground-based vehicles, and a nail-biting attempt by Yaguchi's team to defeat the beast via their own highly unorthodox scientific methods. 

After the dust has settled over Tokyo, SHIN GODZILLA emerges as both a modern update and a welcome throwback.  Just like the old Godzilla movies, it's boring as hell between the monster stuff.  But when Godzilla starts stomping his way through downtown Tokyo as millions of terrified civilians flee for their lives, with the added benefit of today's state-of-the-art effects making the massive devastation all the more perversely thrilling, it makes me feel like a little Monster Kid again.


Our previous coverage of the film

SHIN GODZILLA -- Movie Review by Porfle

GHOST IN THE SHELL 25TH ANNIVERSARY EDITION -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 9/27/14

 

Visually stunning and thematically complex, 1995's intensely cinematic GHOST IN THE SHELL (Anchor Bay, 25th Anniversary Edition) is the kind of dazzling, "hard" sci-fi that doesn't hit the screen very often, and when it does it's often in the form of anime.

While obviously influenced by such films as BLADE RUNNER and that other anime classic AKIRA, GHOST has its own style and ambience that are often mesmerizing. After a pre-titles action sequence that's like something out of a futuristic Bond movie, the main titles show our young heroine, Major Motoko Kusanagi, during the laboratory creation of her cybernetic body in a womblike pool of chemicals.

She then rises naked from it as a sort of placental crust cracks off her body, while Kenji Kawai's ethereal musical score begins to weave its web. And thus we're given a preview of the mind-expanding artistic potential the film will go on to almost effortlessly fulfill.

As with a lot of serious anime, the overly-complicated and sometimes hard to follow plot is mainly a springboard for wildly imaginative, often impressionistic flights of artistic fancy along with some thought-provoking ideas. Set in 2029, the story concerns two secret government agencies whose conflicting agendas will clash in potentially devastating ways.

Major Kusanagi of the Internal Bureau of Investigations is tasked to track down a mysterious villain known as the Puppet Master, a kind of sentient computer virus who can infiltrate the mind of any human whose cyber-enhanced brain is hooked into the system, taking over their will and giving them false memories.

Major Kusanagi is aided in her mission by a hulking, gray-haired mentor named Batou and brawny but easygoing Togusa, who all take part in a frentic chase scene early on which explores just how imaginatively this medium can be used in depicting bullet-riddled vehicular mayhem with the power to thrill in ways that live-action films rarely can. (THE MATRIX and THE FIFTH ELEMENT, on which this film is a distinct influence, come close.)

As the secrets behind the Puppet Master unfold (which I can't reveal without spoiling some of the film's most compelling surprises), GHOST IN THE SHELL offers a seemingly endless procession of eye-pleasing and mind-expanding sci-fi sights, sounds, and concepts. Every once in a while, there's a montage of images that the viewer gets lost in, or a deep, intimate conversation about mortality that can only be engaged in by a couple of cyborgs whose consciousness resides within cybernetic brains.

Kusanagi is particularly contemplative regarding identity since both her body and brain are almost entirely synthetic. Is she even human at all anymore? And since she's connected to the 'net like any other computer, her mind is vulnerable to being hacked by the Puppet Master at any time--if it hasn't been already.

How does she know her memories are real, or that what's she is experiencing at present is really happening? Her potential invasion and subjugation by an unseen force is one of the film's major dramatic concerns, which will eventually lead to an ending which, while somewhat unexpectedly low-key, is intellectually stimulating to say the least.

Directed by Mamoru Oshii (AVALON, ASSAULT GIRLS), the visuals are the work of animators from Production I.G. (BLOOD: THE LAST VAMPIRE, KAIDOHMARU, KILL BILL). The story is based upon Masamune Shirow's original manga. While I usually prefer straight cel animation to a cel-CGI mixture, the digital stuff is used sparingly--mainly for computer readouts and such--and the overall effect is just so eye-pleasing and finely-rendered that it's visually irresistible.

The Blu-ray disc from Anchor Bay and Starz is in 1.85:1 anamorphic widescreen with Dolby 5.1 English and 2.0 Japanese audio and English subtitles. The disc is barebones with no bonus features. The disc case contains an illustrated booklet with a Mamoru Oshii interview and two essays, "The World of Ghost in the Shell" and "The Impact of Ghost in the Shell."

Not a children's "cartoon" by any means (it, as they say, "contains violence, nudity, and adult themes"), GHOST IN THE SHELL lavishes the viewer with moments of beauty and contemplation which explore the emotional limits of animation while also generating explosive, edge-of-your-seat action. Like all really good science-fiction, it's both visceral and sublime.

GHOST IN THE SHELL 25TH ANNIVERSARY EDITION -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle

THE GREEN SLIME (1968) -- Movie Review by Porfle

 

Originally posted on 6/9/21

 

Currently watching: THE GREEN SLIME (1968), a collaboration between Italy, Japan, and the USA, with the disparate cinematic styles of each clashing together to create a wild space opera-slash-monster movie that's both exhilaratingly strange and delightfully bad.

Some time in the future an orbiting space station detects an asteroid on a collision course with Earth. Commander Jack Rankin (TV star Robert Horton, "A Man Called Shenandoah", "Wagon Train") is called out of retirement to head a team of astronauts to take off from the space station, land on the asteroid, and plant bombs that will blow it to smithereens.

The team does so in what is basically a small-scale dry run for the later epic ARMAGEDDON, but this time the astronauts bring back an unexpected souvenir from the asteroid in the form of a strange green slime which, when charged with electricity, grows into a horde of grotesque, very hostile alien creatures with pincer-tipped tentacles and one big red eye. 

 

 

Feeding upon the space station's various energy sources, the creatures grow in size and multiply rapidly until the station's inhabitants begin dying horribly one by one and end up fighting hand-to-tentacle for their very survival.

Hence, the entire second half of the film is a furious and at times incomprehensible series of frantic battle sequences splattered with red blood and green slime, as the space soldiers struggle to protect the station's medical and scientific personnel as well as other civilians.

To make matters worse, Rankin's romantic rival, Commander Vince Elliott (Richard Jaeckel, THE DIRTY DOZEN, STARMAN) chafes at having his command usurped by Rankin, with the mutual object of their affection, beautiful medical officer Dr. Lisa Benson (Luciana Paluzzi, THUNDERBALL, MUSCLE BEACH PARTY), adding fuel to the fire with her very presence.

 

 
From the film's first scenes, we're treated to an environment almost totally comprised of miniatures--cityscapes, rocket launch pads and spaceships, the rotating space station itself, etc.--which sometimes approach the quality of the usual Toho/Kaiju stuff we're used to, while at other times are markedly cheap and fake-looking.

Space station and spaceship interiors have the low-budget look of the old live-action Saturday morning sci-fi shows from Filmation such as "Space Academy" and "Jason of Star Command", and even such earlier series as "Rocky Jones, Space Ranger." On the plus side, vivid colors abound in most scenes, especially those involving the approaching asteroid, giving them a pleasing comic-book quality.

The low-rent feel of the film also shows in the artless, almost amateurish direction and camerawork, which, combined with the freaky slime-monster costumes and other slapdash special effects, make the film either an object of boredom and derision or, for bad movie lovers such as myself, a delightfully dizzying wallow in junk-movie joy.

 

Amazingly, this movie was directed by the same man, Kinji Fukasaku, who would go on to helm the spectacular sci-fi classic BATTLE ROYALE in 2000.  The consistently tense screenplay also boasts as its co-writer another familiar name--Bill Finger, who, along with Bob Kane, created the legendary comic book character, Batman.

Square-jawed and stern, Horton's Commander Rankin could almost have stepped right out of an episode of "Thunderbirds Are Go!" Jaeckle gets a rare chance to stretch his considerable acting chops in a major role, while Paluzzi has a cult appeal all her own as the woman who keeps the film's romantic triangle fired up while protecting her patients from the rampaging slime creatures.

While none of this looks or feels convincing for a second, THE GREEN SLIME is such a relentless onslaught of splashy, full-tilt space madness that one can hardly fail to enjoy it to some degree, on its own oddball terms, as an old-fashioned space opera laced with cheesy 1960s mod stylings and juvenile Monster Kid fun.

THE GREEN SLIME (1968) -- Movie Review by Porfle

HARD REVENGE MILLY -- DVD Review by Porfle

 

 Originally posted on 5/13/10

 

(This double-feature DVD contains HARD REVENGE MILLY and HARD REVENGE MILLY: BLOODY BATTLE.) 

 

Milly wears a black leather trenchcoat to conceal the patchwork ruin of her ravaged body, and walks stiffly due to all of its robotic enhancements--including a shotgun embedded in her right leg that loads at the hip and fires at the knee, and a horrendous razor-edged rig that sprouts from her torso which, thank goodness, we never quite get a good look at. 

She moves quickly and purposefully, preparing a bloody revenge against the thugs who massacred her family and left her for dead two years before. And when the blood-drenched hyper-action of HARD REVENGE MILLY (2008) kicks into high gear, it's a clear case of love at first sight for this giddy viewer. 

After the repeal of all gun and sword laws, Yokohama, Japan 20XX A.D. is a wasteland of crime and violence where murder is sport and only the strong survive. Milly (Miki Mizuno, CARVED: THE SLIT-MOUTHED WOMAN) gets by on nothing more than the desire for revenge against the loathesome Jack Brothers, whose sadistic thrill-murder of her husband and baby grows more horrific with each flashback. 

We never get a good look when she opens her jacket but it must be pretty messed-up, especially after we see her being brutally stabbed 20 or 30 times, and the extent of her surgical body modification is suggested rather shockingly during the finale. 

Milly is an interesting character who's fun to watch, even if she's just preparing for her next duel or sitting somewhere reflecting on the past. Her meeting with former blade-sharpener Jubei in his dingy coffee bar, whom she asks to sharpen her retractable elbow-sword although he's retired from the death business, echoes Beatrix' meeting with Hattori Hanzo in KILL BILL. 

All of the performances are fine, with Miki Mizuno and Mitsuki Koga as Jack being the stand-outs. In a cool opening sequence, Milly makes short work of Jack's drug-dealing brother Kyoshiro (splitting his torso with a bloody flash of her elbow sword), uses his body to create a grotesque welcoming display, and gives Jack a call inviting him to drop by. 

When the surviving Jack Brothers arrive and encounter her in an abandoned building, it's one thrilling action-packed death duel after another. The dialogue leading up to this is funny as male and female Jack Brothers Tetsu and Yuma discuss how hungry they are after getting a whiff of Kyoshiro's roasting corpse on their way in. After that comes what is now one of my favorite death scenes ever--it's so cool that I found it wonderfully hilarious in its offhand audacity. 

Milly's fight with Jack himself is an extended setpiece that yields a wealth of pleasures--their climactic clash of swords, guns, fists, and other arcane weaponry is dazzling. Takanori Tsujimoto's direction and editing are exquisite, and like the rest of the sublimely-staged action in this film it's executed with such imagination and style that watching it made me giddy. The furious choreography is first-rate considering that no doubles are used, and even the wirework is convincingly handled. 

This is low-budget filmmaking driven by skill, creativity, and imagination to exceed its limitations and become a unique and scintillating entertainment that's every bit as satisfying as any multi-million-dollar production. Short and sweet (only 44 minutes long), it left me keen with anticipation for the feature-length follow-up. 

HARD REVENGE MILLY: BLOODY BATTLE (2009) takes up where the previous film left off, with Milly now being hunted by Jack's bombastic gay lover Ikki (Kazuki Tsujimoto) and his accomplice Hyuma (Ray Fujita). "Jack was the craziest, sexiest man in the world!" Ikki declares as they plot their revenge. 

Meanwhile, a timid young woman named Haru (Nao Nagasawa) has sought out Milly for a different purpose--to help her get revenge against the person who killed her lover. When they're both attacked in Milly's warehouse hideout (in the film's first bloody action scene), Milly takes the injured Haru to a fortified outpost called LAND to be treated by the same crazy doctor who delights in keeping Milly's mechanically-enhanced body in working order ("Don't let any other doctor touch that thing in your chest," he urges). Milly empathizes with Haru and agrees to help her, but this must be postponed when Ikki and his gang of killers invade LAND and launch a blazing attack. 

With more time to develop the story and characters, writer-director Takanori Tsujimoto gives us more to contemplate while ratcheting up the action factor. The quiet moments are effective, such as Milly's melancholy reflections to Haru on the futility of revenge. Often the film looks and feels the way BLADE RUNNER might've been if Ridley Scott had done it as a no-budget indie feature. (Like certain characters in Scott's film, part-machine Milly begins to doubt the validity of her own memories; she won't let the doctor X-ray her head for fear of what he might find.) There are also welcome hints of such films as MAD MAX and THE CROW. 

The script is brimming with interesting dialogue and the performances are outstanding. Again, the stunning and intricately choreographed (not to mention delightfully gory) fight sequences are bristling with imagination and the execution is often breathtaking. Takanori Tsujimoto keeps coming up with interesting ways to shoot and edit these scenes and introduces some thrilling variations on traditional weapons--I was on the verge of cheering when Milly went up against a horde of bad guys with her laser-sighted, bullet-spewing nunchaku. 

As in the first film, there's a climactic battle with the baddest bad guy that's a free-for-all of frenetic fun, ending with another of my new all-time favorite multi-rewindable death scenes. (This one's a real doozy, folks.) There's even a surprising story twist that (hopefully) sets up the next sequel. 

The double-feature DVD from Well Go USA, Inc. is in 16:9 widescreen with Dolby 5.1 stereo. Soundtrack is Japanese with English subtitles. Extras include trailers and "making of" featurettes for both films. 

Visually interesting throughout, with an involving story and vivid characters, HARD REVENGE MILLY: BLOODY BATTLE is compelling sci-fi on a limited budget. It definitely gets a permanent spot in my DVD collection, in that special place where nobody can walk off with it and the dog won't eat it. I love this movie. 

 

HARD REVENGE MILLY -- DVD Review by Porfle

MXC VOLUME THREE -- DVD Review by Porfle

(NOTE: This review originally appeared online at Bumscorner.com in 2007.)


I haven't had cable TV for almost three years, and I don't really miss it--with a few notable exceptions. One of these would have to be Spike TV's irresistibly amusing and often downright delightful "Most Extreme Elimination Challenge" (or "MXC"), which debuted in 2003. It's so watchable and funny, you'd have to be an inflamed zit on Andy Rooney's left buttock not to enjoy it.



That's why I was so pleased to receive a screener for the DVD release of MXC VOLUME THREE. While the actual DVD will be a 2-disc set containing 13 half-hour episodes, the screener only came with two of them. But let's face it, if watching just five minutes of MXC doesn't tell you whether or not this is your cup of warm sake, then you should probably go to a proctologist and have your head examined.



Originally a silly, but genuine, Japanese game show from the 80s called "Takeshi's Castle", these episodes have been redubbed to transform them into the most surrealistic and frequently hilarious fake game show imaginable. The two lovable play-by-play announcers are now named Vic Romano and Kenny Blankenship--Kenny's the featherbrained cut-up, while Vic is the straight man who is so serenely unfazed by Kenny's ridiculous antics that his usual response is an earnest "Right you are, Ken" or a simple "Indeeed!"



Other characters include contestant wrangler Captain Tenneal, who gets the players whipped into a semi-frenzy before unleashing them upon the field of battle with the words "Let's get it on!", and field announcer Guy LaDouche, a cackling pervert whose contestant interviews are gleefully lecherous.



The competition always involves two opposing teams of reckless idiots--one of whom invariably sports the last name of "Babaganoosh"--partaking in ludicrous games that often result in them either being attacked from the sidelines by wild men or dunked in various kinds of "fluid" such as trucker man-gravy or toxic biological waste.



The two episodes I got to review featured the following teams squaring off against each other: Organized Crime vs. Weight Loss, and the Novelty/Gift Industry vs. the Death Industry. Needless to say, Organized Crime has the edge over their competition as they resort to the use of snipers, death threats, and other creative tactics. And as always, each episode ends with a recap of the most cringe-inducing spills known as "Kenny Blankenship's Most Painful Eliminations of the Day."



As the box copy aptly states, MXC is like a cross between Woody Allen's redubbed Japanese comedy WHAT'S UP, TIGER LILY? and "Mystery Science Theater 3000." Each cleverly-scripted episode is total giddy fun all the way--low-brow humor and non-stop sexual innuendos fly fast and furious, while the new dialogue fits hilariously with the images of smarmy announcers, hokey costumed characters, and wildly enthusiastic contestants throwing themselves into each challenge with little regard for their dignity or physical well-being.



Rarely does a live-action TV show get this cartoonish and totally silly, and if that's the kind of thing that makes your inner disturbed child do double backflips, then you should run headlong through a wacky-but-dangerous obstacle course over a vat of rich, trucker man gravy to get your mitts on a copy of MXC VOLUME THREE.



And remember: "DON'T...GET...ELIMINATED!"

MXC VOLUME THREE -- DVD Review by Porfle

APARTMENT 1303 -- DVD Review by Porfle

 

Originally posted on 7/1/08

 

Asian horror has gotten a reputation lately for being the real deal, but that doesn't mean every film in the genre is a total terror-fest. Tartan Asia Extreme's APARTMENT 1303 has many of the familiar elements, but it isn't all that successful in putting them to good use.

As the story opens, a young woman who just scored a great apartment with an ocean view for a paltry sum goes flying off the balcony the day she moves in--SPLAT! A month later, Sayaka moves in and moves out the same way--SPLAT! Turns out she's number five on the hit list, a small detail the landlords conveniently forget to mention to prospective renters. The perplexed police, meanwhile, chalk them all up as suicides.

Sayaka's big sister, Mariko, decides to investigate and discovers that two of the previous tenants were an abused girl and her crazy mother, whose restless spirits still inhabit the apartment and don't take kindly to anyone else moving in. When a group of teens rent the place for the summer and start sailing over the balcony rail--it's a triple-header this time!--Mariko goes in for a face-off against death.

The first half of APARTMENT 1303 is the creepiest. Director Ataru Oikawa does a good job of establishing an eerie, anything-can-happen atmosphere within the claustrophobic confines of the apartment, even making a simple closet seem like a thing of dread. There are a few of the traditional "gotcha!" shots here, and one in particular had me jumping out of my skin about halfway through. Special effects are pretty good without relying much on CGI. The cast does a nice job, particularly Noriko Nakagoshi as Mariko, and there's also a little girl who lives in apartment 1302 who really started to give me the willies after awhile.

After a promising start, however, the film fails to realize its potential. The apparitions that keep popping up now and then aren't that scary, even when one of them starts sprouting yards and yards of knotty black hair for no reason. One of them has so many long closeups that we begin to concentrate on the somewhat unconvincing makeup.

The climactic confrontations between the living and the dead are filled with lots of fog, wind effects, flashing lights, etc., which aren't any more frightening here than they were in POLTERGEIST. There is a pretty chilling moment shortly before the fadeout, but it leads to what I found to be a distinctly less-than-satisfying ending. After all is said and done, in fact, the most effective part of the film is probably the drama between Mariko and her hopelessly grieving mother.

The DVD comes in 1:85:1 anamorphic widescreen with Dolby Digital 5.1 and DTS surround sound. The soundtrack is in Japanese with English and Spanish subtitles. Bonus features consist of a photo gallery plus the trailer for this and six other Tartan Asia Extreme releases.

Not a bad film by any means, APARTMENT 1303 would probably make for a good introduction into Asian horror. But for those who have already shivered in fear at the cream of that genre's crop, this one may seem hardly scarier than an average episode of Rod Serling's "Night Gallery."

APARTMENT 1303 -- DVD Review by Porfle

SAMURAI PRINCESS -- DVD Review by Porfle

 

Originally posted on 5/l1/10

 

One of those low-low-budget flicks that substitutes outrageousness for fancy production values, Japan's SAMURAI PRINCESS (2009) is a goodnaturedly over-the-top wallow in deadpan absurdity, comic book heroics, and gore, gore, gore. Did I mention gore? There's a lot of that, too.

In a dystopian future where sword-wielding outlaws roam the forests along with kill-crazy cyborgs known as Mechas, eleven innocent young girls are fallen upon (literally) and killed by a gang of bad guys. Lucky for them a mad scientist named Kyoraku (Asuka Kataoka), who loves to make Mechas with the help of his two giggling female assistants, is in a creative mood. Using different parts from each girl, he creates Gedohime, the vengeful Samurai Princess (Aino Kishi), into whom is instilled the souls of all eleven girls by a white-haired nun praying to an obliging Buddha. In doing so, the nun fears that she has transformed the souls in "heretic devils."

Gedohime goes on a bloody rampage against Mechas and outlaws, including a couple of gleefully homicidal robotic punk lovers named Shachi and Kocho who love to kill people and make grotesque works of art out of their victims' body parts. Meanwhile, she's being tracked by Mecha hunter Mikaduki (Mao Shiina) and her spoiled rich friend Mangetsu (Miki Hirase), who goes along just for fun. Gedohime is joined by guitar-slinging former Mecha hunter Gekko (Dai Mizuno), now being hunted himself for having a mechanical hand.


Looking like the low-budget affair that it is, SAMURAI PRINCESS is directed by Kengo Kaji in a sloppy, freewheeling style and never takes itself seriously even when it's pretending to. The fights are fast and fun, with quick cuts and jerky camerawork substituting for actual skill in most cases, and you never know what sort of super power--flaming rocket feet, chainsaw arms, even breast grenades--that these wacky Mechas are going to come up with next.

The gore is like an all-you-can-eat buffet in a cheap diner--not all that fancy but there's plenty of it. With their razor-sharp swords, Gedohime and the bad Mechas chop up foes into their component parts like Ginsu chefs, leaving heaping piles of body parts along with the occasional gruesome artwork. Sometimes you can see the seams on a plastic foot or whatever, but this is a minor quibble. One thing's for sure--this movie's got a lot of guts.


Occasionally an effect will look pretty cool, as when Shachi knocks a guy's entire skeleton out through his back, or Gedohime splits a fleeing bandit's head with her breast grenades, or Kocho inserts her scissor foot into a guy's mouth and slices his face in half, all with the obligatory geysers of blood. (When Gedohime pulls a guy's brain out of his skull in order to "question it directly", the effect looks fake but it doesn't matter because it's so funny.) And speaking of blood, each victim seems to contain several gallons of it, which continues to gush like a burst water pipe long after they're dead.

The special-effects crew save their best for last, however, when Gedohime takes on a hulking, rubbery monstrosity that's composed of male and female bodies fused together. Mortally wounded, she calls upon the spirits of the eleven girls to turn her into a multiple-sword-swinging shiva and the battle is on. Too bad the entire movie isn't this exciting, as there are the occasional draggy parts, but here the comedic touches help maintain our interest. There's also some softcore sex to beef up the film's exploitation value, as Gedohime imagines herself and Gekko having soft-focus sex in their original human bodies.


The DVD from Well Go USA, Inc. is in 16:9 widescreen with Dolby 5.1 stereo, Japanese or English dubbed soundtrack, and English subtitles. Extras include a trailer, photo gallery, and "making of" featurette.

I doubt if this film will have anyone making room for it on their ten-best or even hundred-best lists anytime soon. But if anyone happens to concoct a list entitled "Ten Most Dumb-Fun Low-Budget Japanese Samurai-Chick Gore Flicks of 2009", then SAMURAI PRINCESS should definitely qualify for a spot on it.

SAMURAI PRINCESS -- DVD Review by Porfle