THINGS -- DVD Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 7/8/11

 

While one review hails THINGS (1989) as "a movie that defines what 'cult' really is", you'd be quite accurate in saying that this low-budget, straight-to-VHS Canadian gorefest also defines what "100% brain-rotting crap" really is. 

There's no denying that this is one of the worst excuses for a movie ever made.  It's one of those films whose status as either "so bad it's good" or "totally unwatchable dreck" depends entirely upon the charity of the viewer.  That said, though, if you catch it in the right mood--as the film's many fans apparently did--you can have an awful lot of fun watching it.

Shot on Super-8mm by high-school pals Andrew Jordan (co-writer, director) and Barry J. Gillis (co-producer, co-writer, star), THINGS is the story of a man named Doug Drake (Doug Bunston) who seeks medical help when he and his wife Susan are unable to conceive a child.  Unfortunately, Dr. Lucas (Jan W. Pachul) turns out to be a giggling, sadistic psycho who takes time out from torturing people in his dungeon of horror (the torture scenes are amateurish-looking but extreme) to impregnate Susan with a monster fetus.



Later, Doug's brother Don (Gillis) and his friend Fred (Bruce Roach) drop by Doug's secluded cabin in the backwoods of Toronto for an exciting evening of drinking beer and watching TV.  Suddenly, Susan gives birth to a creature that looks like a cross between a chest-burster from ALIEN and a giant cootie.  The thing begins to multiply at an alarming rate until the house is crawling with them, plunging Don, Fred, and Doug into a nightmare of insect insanity and gratuitous gore. 

While all of this sounds exciting, it isn't, and the most interesting thing about the film is the bizarre and illogical behavior of its main characters.  After Susan's horrific death (during which actress Patricia Sadler is unable to suppress a smile whenever she's on camera), Doug's initial grief quickly gives way to lighthearted prankishness and an overall "who cares" attitude, in addition to a concern that his nice shirt has been ruined by Susan's gushing blood.  Don interrupts the somber mood with a gruesome campfire story at the kitchen table, while Fred wonders what kind of cool TV shows are on. 

Characters appear and disappear seemingly at random--we don't even know Doug is in the house with Don and Fred until there's a sudden closeup of his butt, after which he disappears again.  The total lack of basic storytelling skills forces us to decipher what's going on in almost every scene, even down to figuring out whether we're supposed to find certain drawn-out sequences funny, suspenseful, or scary.
 


There seem to be several deliberate attempts at comedy throughout the story, but the serious and funny elements are so equally stupid that it's hard to tell.  I laughed out loud when the dog got killed, and I don't even know why.  Other scenes are equally amusing for unknown reasons, such as the part where Doug and Don are searching the bathroom for bug-monsters and find one perched on the toilet, and then each of them insists on using the bathroom anyway. 

Much of the running time is padded with shots of them wandering around the house with their flashlights, trading goofy dialogue and doing things that don't make sense.  When they finally go down into the basement to change out some fuses, a sudden bug attack results in Don bludgeoning Doug with a club.  More excitement ensues when Fred finds an electric chainsaw and goes commando against the critters while Don wields a power drill as though he were building the world's most insane birdhouse.  The film's most hilarious moment ("I'm still alive!") is followed by a surprise visit from none other than the gleefully insane Dr. Lucas, after which things just go totally whacko until the film abruptly ends. 

THINGS supposedly cost around $40,000 to make, but I can't imagine it costing any more than forty dollars.  A sizable chunk of the budget ($2,500) went to 80s porn goddess Amber Lynn, who consented to appear as a TV news reporter making intermittent appearances throughout the film.  Reading her lines cold from a cue card held way off to the side, Amber doesn't come off too good here.  This is irrelevant, though, since her presence is mainly an excuse to use sexy pictures of her in the advertising.  The film's only nudity comes in the first scene, in which a woman (a real-life hooker who appeared under the condition that her face not be shown) strips naked while wearing a devil mask that makes her resemble a deranged Ed Wood.



The DVD from InterVision is in full-screen with 2.0 sound.  Extras include two commentaries, trailers, Barry J. Gillis TV appearances promoting the film, a cast and crew 20th anniversary reunion, a ten-minute behind-the-scenes look at Amber Lynn filming her scenes, and testimonials for the film including comments by Tobe Hooper (TEXAS CHAIN SAW MASSACRE) and Jason Eisener (HOBO WITH A SHOTGUN).  After the closing credits crawl there's more candid footage of Amber Lynn and some outtakes.

The first commentary, an audio viewing party with the Cinefamily, is fun, but the cast and crew commentary is a wonderfully raucous affair during which Gillis' daughter, Victoria Elizabeth Turnbull (who also appears in the anniversary segment), mercilessly mocks the film while a growing air of inebriation seems to prevail.

With camerawork and editing that seem to have been performed by blind people and dubbing that might've been done from across the street--not to mention some of the most delightfully atrocious acting of all time--you might think that THINGS was made by people who have never seen a movie before.  As things grow more bizarre and nonsensical, however, the film begins to look more like something made by aliens who have never seen human beings before.

THINGS -- DVD Review by Porfle

BLOODLUST! -- DVD Review by Porfle

 

Originally posted on 2/15/14

 

I've never seen BLOODLUST! (1961) get the Mystery Science Theater 3000 treatment, but it would certainly seem like a suitable subject.  It's cheap, somewhat sub-par in most production aspects,  not overly well-written, and, suffice it to say, a bit silly at times.  And the fact that Robert Reed plays the lead teenage hero is, by itself, enough for a buttload of "Brady Bunch" jokes.

(In one scene, the bad guy shoots a ceramic horse with a crossbow and shatters it.  The horse--wouldn't you know it--looks almost exactly like the one in the Bradys' livingroom.  Hence the line "Mom always said, don't shoot crossbows in the house" simply writes itself.)

The thing is, though, once you get past the TEENAGE ZOMBIES vibe of the opening minutes (two flaky teenage couples discover a heretofore unknown island and romp merrily into the clutches of the evil recluse who owns it), the film rises above its potential Jerry Warren-level awfulness and approaches the relatively higher quality of FRANKENSTEIN'S DAUGHTER--which was directed by BLOODLUST!'s cinematographer, Richard E. Cunha--or perhaps even Ray Kellogg's minor classic THE KILLER SHREWS. 

Wilton Graff (LUST FOR LIFE, LILI) helps lend gravitas to the proceedings as Dr. Albert Balleau, former military sniper who now continues his passion for hunting humans on his private island and is delighted to have such fit new specimens to grace his trophy room.  Johnny (Reed) and his nerdy pal Pete (Gene Persson) get to be the designated prey, while their lucky girlfriends, pretty blond judo expert Betty (June Kenney, EARTH VS. THE SPIDER) and jittery Joan (Jeanne Perry), face induction into Dr. Balleau's Rock 'n' Roll Hall of Femmes. 

Also giving the film a leg-up in quality are first and only time director Ralph Brooke's brother Walter--the insanely-prolific character actor who would gain screen immortality with the single word "Plastics" in 1967's THE GRADUATE--as reluctant Balleau cohort Dean, and the equally-familiar Lilyan Chauvin (SILENT NIGHT, DEADLY NIGHT, PREDATOR 2) as Balleau's beautiful but miserable wife Sandra.  She and Dean are secret lovers who dream of escaping the island together, which now seems doable with the help of the four captive teens.  This plan works out about as well as you might expect, as long as you keep your expectations nice and low.

Bad movie lovers will enjoy the low-rent look of the interiors of Dr. Balleau's mansion (although the jungle sets and rock-walled trophy room aren't half bad) and relish the sight of young Robert Reed all puffed up in a tight T-shirt while giving his character the same easygoing suavity  and mild horndoggishness that he would later ooze as Mike Brady.  He also adopts his familiar fatherly tone in dealing with his more weak-willed pals Pete and Joan, who prove rather useless during the whole ordeal. 

The more capable Betty, meanwhile, gets to use her judo skills when she flips an oncoming henchman into a vat of acid, which, through the magic of cutaway editing, disintegrates him nicely.  BLOODLUST! is generally pretty gory at times for 1961, especially when Pete and Joan observe Balleau's chief lackey Jondor (Bobby Hall) arranging dismembered body parts to be stuffed for the trophy room. 

Jondor himself emerges from  a pit of quicksand later on with a host of live leeches squirming on his face, one of the film's lovelier images, and the whole thing ends with one of the cast skewered on wall spikes as blood gushes freely.  But somehow, perhaps due to the above-average cast taking the whole thing seriously, the film doesn't exude nearly the kind of lurid, H.G. Lewis-type aura it might have.

The DVD from Film Chest has a 4 x 3 aspect ratio with original mono sound.  No subtitles, but scrolling closed-captioning is available.  No extras. 

Touted as an "HD restoration from 35mm film elements", it still has some rough spots--particularly during the main titles and reel changes--along with occasional specks throughout the entire film.  Still, this print looks way, way better than the ragged PD copy I have on a Mill Creek collection, and is generally pretty nice-looking.  (Stills used for this review are not taken from the Film Chest restoration.)

While this modest (to put it mildly) reworking of THE MOST DANGEROUS GAME isn't exactly riveting, it remains fairly entertaining from start to finish and I had a good time watching it.  The mood is effectively morbid, the jungle hunt sequence sufficiently suspenseful, and the ending particularly satisfying.  If you're the kind of person who has a sweet tooth for flicks like TEENAGE ZOMBIES, FRANKENSTEIN'S DAUGHTER, and THE KILLER SHREWS, then BLOODLUST! may actually belong in your very own trophy room.

BLOODLUST! -- DVD Review by Porfle

Jack Nicholson Is Moved To Tears While Talking About Roger Corman (video)

 

 

 From the 2011 Documentary "Corman's World: Exploits of a Hollywood Rebel"  For our review of the documentary, click here.

 

Video by Porfle Popnecker. I neither own nor claim any rights to this material. Just having some fun with it. Thanks for watching!

Jack Nicholson Is Moved To Tears While Talking About Roger Corman (video)

THE SINISTER EYES OF DR. ORLOFF -- DVD Review by Porfle

 

Originally posted on 1/24/11

 

 

Incredibly prolific Spanish filmmaker Jesús "Jess" Franco has a devoted following, but the uninitiated might be puzzled as to why after watching THE SINISTER EYES OF DR. ORLOFF (1973).  It's not an awful film, just exceedingly bland.

Montserrat Prous plays Melissa Comfort, an heiress who has been paralyzed from birth.  Plagued by a recurring nightmare in which she wanders the darkened mansion as a little girl and witnesses the violent death of her late father (Franco himself in a cameo role), Melissa is placed in the care of eminent psychiatrist Dr. Orloff (William Berger) by her aunt, Lady Flora Comfort. 

It soon becomes apparent that there's a plot against Melissa which may involve members of her own family, including her Aunt Flora, step-sister Martha, and perhaps even Dr. Orloff himself.  Melissa is aided by faithful servant Mathews (José Manuel Martín) and a concerned neighbor, pop star Sweet Davey Brown.  But when people around her start dying off one by one, it may be only a matter of time before she's next.  The question is--who's really doing the killing?

 

 

The third of Franco's "Dr. Orloff" films, this is remarkably tame stuff for someone known for his exploitation flicks.  The slow-moving story features the occasional murder, but all are quick and relatively bloodless.  Aside from an incidental glimpse of nudity during one of the killings, there's nothing here that one couldn't find in a standard made-for-TV thriller from the era.

A reliance on handheld camerawork and shaky zooms gives the film a crude look, although it's hardly unwatchable.  Franco does display a few flashes of imagination in his direction and keeps things moving along well enough that patient viewers won't have much trouble sticking with it to the end.  The story itself is utterly predictable and there's little actual suspense until the mildly exciting finale, all of which is accompanied by a melodramatic organ and piano score.

Performances are adequate for this type of movie, though it's admittedly hard to judge the actors' dialogue delivery since I understand very little Spanish.  William Berger isn't all that sinister as Orloff and is, in fact, pretty dull, even when we get a closeup of those titular eyeballs.  Montserrat Prous is okay as Melissa--more interesting, though, are Loreta Tovar and the lovely Kali Hansa as spoiled socialites Martha and Aunt Flora.

 

 

 

As Davey Brown, Robert Wood is notable mainly for his awful 70s wardrobe and insipid singing.  His scenes with Edmund Purdom as Inspector Crosby, in which Davey struggles to convince the policeman that something rotten is going on in the Comfort manor, give the film what scant comedy relief it has.  Franco regular Lina Romay appears briefly as Davey's girlfriend.

The DVD from Intervision is full-screen with Dolby 2.0 Spanish mono soundtrack and English subtitles.  Picture quality is good although that Eastmancolor doesn't age very well.  On my copy, the subtitles disappeared for a few minutes around the 46-minute mark.  The bonus feature is a recent 18-minute interview with Jess Franco. 

THE SINISTER EYES OF DR. ORLOFF is a nice low-budget effort that's fairly painless to sit through if you keep your expectations low.  Just don't expect it to be very sinister. 

THE SINISTER EYES OF DR. ORLOFF -- DVD Review by Porfle

THE KILLER SHREWS -- DVD Review by Porfle

 

Originally posted on 10/24/14

 

One of the most well-liked, perhaps even loved, titles in the bad-movie pantheon is a low-budget horror/sci-fi thriller from 1959 called THE KILLER SHREWS.

As I myself pointed out in great detail in an earlier review--intended, admittedly, more for Medved-style cuteness than anything else--there's a lot to poke fun at in this modest effort if you've a mind to.

But even as it gets its share of well-deserved ridicule (especially for the giggle-worthy fact that its mutated shrew creatures are actually dogs wearing monster costumes) and is one of the most popular films to have been given the MST3K treatment, one of the main reasons this tense little flick has such staying power is that in addition to being "so bad it's good", it is also, in many ways, just plain good.

For one thing, it's one of the first movies in which a disparate group of people barricade themselves in a house to defend themselves against an outside menace. As has often been pointed out, the similarities between it and George Romero's 1968 horror classic NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD indicate that Romero was influenced by the earlier film.

Which gives rise to an even more intriguing thought--did Alfred Hitchcock see THE KILLER SHREWS before coming up with his own barricaded-house thriller THE BIRDS four years later?

The story is pure straightforward pulp novel stuff, with manly cargo boat captain Thorne Sherman serving as a no-nonsense working class hero. When he and first mate "Rook" Griswold (Judge Henry Dupree) deliver supplies to a group of research scientists on a remote island that's about to be hit by a hurricane, he finds he's walked right into danger in the form of wolf-sized, man-eating killer shrews whose teeth drip instantly-lethal venom.

Heading the research group is Dr. Marlowe Craigis (leading Yiddish theater actor and famed director Sidney Lumet's father, Baruch Lumet), a well-meaning scientist wracked by guilt for having unwittingly unleashed such monsters. Among those threatened by them is his own daughter Ann, played by Ingrid Goude who was Miss Sweden of 1956 and, while not a very skilled actress, at least brings a likable earnestness to her performance.

In the role of Dr. Craigis' cowardly assistant Jerry Farrell is Ken Curtis (THE SEARCHERS, THE ALAMO), who would go on to TV superstardom as Festus Haggen on "Gunsmoke." Curtis has a field day playing Jerry as a weaselly lush driven by ambition and burning with jealousy after Ann starts making goo-goo eyes at Captain Thorne, and we can't wait to see the shrews chow down on this insufferable jerk.

Rounding out the cast are executive producer Gordon McLendon as endearingly nerdy scientist Dr. Radford Baines and Alfredo DeSoto as loyal handyman Mario. McLendon and Curtis also co-produced THE GIANT GILA MONSTER that same year, and both films were directed by Ray Kellogg, who co-directed THE GREEN BERETS along with John Wayne. A special effects man as well as director, Kellogg supplies some really nice-looking matte paintings to the shots of Thorne's boat anchored in the island harbor.

While many low-budget horror flicks of the era are technically inept and heavily padded, THE KILLER SHREWS' lean, suspenseful story moves along briskly once the exposition is out of the way. The shrew attacks themselves are often frightening as the revolting creatures relentlessly chew their way through the soft adobe walls of the house in a frantic search for "food."

It helps that the actors seem so thoroughly convinced that the dogs-in-monster-suits menace is real. James Best, known mainly as Rosco P. Coltrane on "The Dukes of Hazzard", somehow fits his own laconic persona into the part of a macho action hero well enough for us to buy into Thorne Sherman as a guy with the brains and brawn to get these people through this seemingly hopeless ordeal.

Meanwhile, some of the dialogue is laughably off-kilter and seems even more amusing as the cast strains to deliver it with utmost seriousness, often while guzzling martinis like they're going out of style. Yet they're able to make us care about these desperate people during the escalating shrew attacks, up to and during one of the most ludicrous (yet somehow riveting) climactic sequences ever seen in a film of this kind. The fact that it's played absolutely straight--as is the entire movie--makes it both exciting and, yes, perversely hilarious.

The DVD from Film Chest is in 4 x 3 full screen with original mono sound. No subtitles or extras. While I don't see much difference in this "digitally restored" version than the ones I already have, the image is quite good despite the usual specks and scratches.

What makes this release stand out for me is that the opening narration is complete, beginning with the line "Those who hunt by night will tell you that the wildest and most vicious of all animals is the tiny shrew." Usually this narration is joined in the middle of the final sentence with the truncated line "...Alaska, and then invading steadily southward...there were reports of a new species...the giant killer shrew!"

Apparently only the longer audio survives since the footage to accompany it seems to consist of the same brief shot seen before, only greatly slowed down until the bolt of lightning that heralds the main title. But it's nice to finally hear the whole thing.

Even if you've already watched the MST3K version of THE KILLER SHREWS, it deserves to be seen on its own terms. (Unlike much of the total crap that Joel, Mike, and the robots have comically endured over the years.) With repeated viewings, the unintentional comedy remains entertaining as ever while the suspense and chills contained in this nifty little monster movie steadily creep their way up your spine.


Read our original "The Killer Shrews" review HERE

DVD street date: November 11

THE KILLER SHREWS -- DVD Review by Porfle

THE HORROR OF PARTY BEACH -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle

 Originally posted 8/20/2018

 

When actor-turned-filmmaker Del Tenney made a deal to direct some drive-in fodder for the teen crowd, one of the all-time trash classics he fooled around and came up with was the delirious THE HORROR OF PARTY BEACH (1964).

Though made in the 60s, it contains surefire elements from the biggest teen hits of the 50s--rock and roll, monsters, hot rods, teen angst, and bad comedy--and mixes them with then-current stuff like bikini beach scenes and even a good deal of H. G. Lewis-style gore a la "Blood Feast."

Done in an amateurish yet freewheeling, dumb-fun style that packs in as much of the above elements as it will hold and, unlike many grade-Z flicks, doesn't let up for a minute, the result is a movie that's often funny, creepy, and refreshingly entertaining in spite of itself.

The very first minute of the film features drag racing and motorcycles--courtesy of an actual local bike gang--along with the first of six goofy rock and roll songs by the Del-Aires (in what was billed as "the first horror monster musical.")

We see Hank (John Scott) arguing with his girlfriend Tina (Marilyn Clarke) as they pull into the parking lot of the local beach, where Tina is intent on living it up while Hank insists they begin to act their age. The beach party sequence is real "poor man's" Frankie and Annette stuff, filmed in dreary black and white on a beach in Connecticut and interspersed with some of the worst comedy dialogue exchanges ever.

Meanwhile, fast-chick Tina goes nuts, bumping and grinding to "The Zombie Stomp" with a greasy-haired biker amidst the bikini-clad onlookers and prompting Hank to release his violent side as a big poorly-choreographed fight breaks out.

When Tina runs off into the ocean to escape Hank's disdain, she's attacked and ripped to pieces (and splattered liberally with Bosco chocolate syrup) by a horrific amphibian creature that has recently been created when some radioactive waste carelessly dumped into the water got mixed up with the sodden bodies of recently-drowned sailors.

These monsters (they grow in number with every scene) are real lulus of bad creature design, looking like poor relations of the Black Lagoon creature with ping-pong-ball eyes and what appear to be big bundles of hot dogs sticking out of their mouths.  But just the fact that such relatively elaborate costumes were made for this low-budget flick is impressive.

The rest of THE HORROR OF PARTY BEACH becomes a series of monster attacks in the nearby small town with Dr. Gavin (Allan Laurel), his apprentice Hank, and his daughter Elaine (Alice Lyon), now Hank's prospective girlfriend after the untimely death of Tina, applying all their scientific skills to helping the local cops find a way to track down and destroy the creature menace.

This allows Tenney and company to stage a progression of delightful creature carnage sequences which include an all-girl slumber party massacre, three girls on their way to New York getting tragically sidetracked (the wisecracking blonde in this segment is actually quite funny), and a couple of drunks stumbling their way into the path of the monsters.  (One of the drunks is actor Wayne Tippit of "JFK" and "Nurse Betty", perhaps the only recognizable face in the film.) These scenes include not only lots of fake blood but some nicely-done gore makeup.

While all this is going on, we're treated to the high-jinx of Dr. Gavin's matronly black maid Eulabelle (Eulabelle Moore--yes, that was her real name) going around fretting "It's the voodoo, that's what it is!", and an increasingly ridiculous scientific investigation that results in the good guys hurling handfuls of sodium at the finny fiends.  (The resulting fish-fry pyrotechnics are pretty well done.)

The Severin Blu-ray itself is a 2k scan from the original negative and, needless to say, looks way, way better than I've ever seen it before. (And probably way more uncut, too.)

Severin, as usual, comes through with the bonus features as well, including archival footage of Del Tenney himself discussing his career in general and this film in particular.  "Return to Party Beach" is an informative retrospective documentary, while another featurette offers two of the Del-Aires with an interview and a live performance of "The Zombie Stomp."  In "Shock and Roll", filmaker Tim Sullivan discusses rock and roll horror movies.  The film's trailer is also included.

There are a lot of "so bad it's good" movies out there, with some of them being only passably entertaining with brief moments of fun amidst long stretches of boredom.  THE HORROR OF PARTY BEACH, on the other hand, has a kind of magically bad quality that makes it total, almost giddy fun from start to finish.  This one's got everything and lots of it, and watching it makes me feel like a kid at the drive-in again.


Buy Blu-ray or DVD from Severin Films

THE HORROR OF PARTY BEACH -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle

TURKEY SHOOT -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle

 

Originally posted on 9/17/15

 

I've seen so many tantalizing trailers for "Ozploitation" flicks lately that it's always a pleasure to get to watch one of these trash classics in its entirety.  That's why a basically awful movie like TURKEY SHOOT, a.k.a. "Escape 2000" and "Blood Camp Thatcher" (1982), gets a cheerful response from me even though many viewers would most likely tune out within the first five minutes.

The Australian film industry during the 70s and 80s underwent a real renaissance of exploitation films that transcended their low budgets and meager production values by cramming in as much violence, gore, nudity, slam-bang action, and overall shock value as they could muster.

TURKEY SHOOT is a prime example, using its by-the-numbers plot (which director Brian Trenchard-Smith of BMX BANDITS fame describes as "I AM A FUGITIVE FROM A CHAIN GANG meets THE CAMP ON BLOOD ISLAND and then plays THE MOST DANGEROUS GAME") like a clothesline on which to pin various chase sequences, gleefully fake but extreme gore, several shootouts and explosions, and some gratuitious nudity for our entertainment. 

Much of the story takes place in a prison camp of the then-future year 2000, where a fascist government sends its disobedient citizens for "re-education."  This, of course, involves terror, torture, sexual humiliation, and mind-control, not to mention a little game in which prisoners are offered freedom if they can survive being hunted like animals by the sadistic warden Thatcher (Michael Craig, MYSTERIOUS ISLAND, THE VAULT OF HORROR) and a group of wealthy, jaded sophisticates.  

Docile citizen Chris Walters (Olivia Hussey, BLACK CHRISTMAS, ROMEO AND JULIET) is imprisoned for being in the wrong place at the wrong time, while Paul Anders (Steve Railsback, LIFEFORCE, "Helter Skelter") is a chronic political offender caught running a renegade radio station.  Rita (Lynda Stoner, "Prisoner: Cell Block H") is a "loose woman" who seems to have been chosen solely for the amusement of the guards.

Our own twisted amusement is piqued early on when hulking chief guard Ritter (Roger Ward, "Fifi" in MAD MAX, QUIGLEY DOWN UNDER) beats inmates to death while his cackling toady Red (American actor Gus Mercurio) tries to violate Chris in the shower but gets the old "caught in the zipper" treatment.  Paul, meanwhile, is subjected to a torture cage which allows Railsback to indulge his penchant for method acting. 

The fact that everything is done on the cheap is more obvious in these early camp scenes than during the hunt, which takes place in the Australian wilderness.  There, however, we get an abundance of hokey gore effects (hands are chopped off, a skull is cleaved by a machete, etc., and a strange man-beast character who accompanies one of the hunters gets cut in half after chowing down on someone's pinky toe) and some poorly-staged action involving a mini-bulldozer that looks quite comical at times. 

The huntress Jennifer (Carmen Duncan) cuts an impressive figure riding her horse while wielding a crossbow that shoots explosive arrows.  Thatcher and Ritter get in on the action as well, as does Noel Ferrier of THE YEAR OF LIVING DANGEROUSLY in the role of "Secretary Mallory."  It's a no-brainer that Paul and Chris will eventually get together and turn the tables on their pursuers, leading to a lively camp-revolt finale that packs in all the blood squibs, explosions, and stock footage that the producers could afford. 

Railsback, hot off his success in THE STUNT MAN, seems a little awkward as an action-guy character and clearly wonders what the heck he's doing shooting a turkey like TURKEY SHOOT.  I've always found him to be an interesting actor though, ever since he played Charles Manson in the 1976 TV-movie "Helter Skelter."  Olivia Hussey seems jittery and uncomfortable throughout--as we learn from cast and crew interviews, she was constantly terrified that the Australian wildlife was out to get her.  This does work in her character's favor, however.  (Her shower scene, incidentally, clearly involves a body double.)

On a technical level, the film is hardly more lavish than a "Mr. Show" sketch.  The camp itself resembles a collection of storage buildings, and there's very little to indicate the story's "futuristic" setting.  (A rousing score by Brian May of MAD MAX fame is a definite plus.)  While director Trenchard-Smith claims that the character name "Thatcher" is part of the film's underlying political message, none of that goes beyond the impact of the typical Facebook meme.

The Blu-ray from Severin Films is in anamorphic widescreen with Dolby 2.0 sound.  No subtitles.  Severin's typically generous bonus features include: "The Ozploitation Renaissance", a recent interview with Aussie filmmakers Brian Trenchard-Smith, Antony I. Ginnane, and Vincent Monton; a solo interview with Trenchard-Smith from the 80s; a director's audio commentary; behind-the-scenes doc "Turkey Shoot: Blood & Thunder Memories"; the film's trailer and an alternate "Escape 2000" title sequence; and in-depth cast and crew interviews from the documentary "Not Quite Hollywood." 

In interviews, both Steve Railsback and Lynda Stoner express their dismay at the finished product, especially in regard to how the original script they were given was gutted and the budget slashed.  Still, none of this really matters--with all its faults, the film has its own sordid charm--and the people most likely to enjoy it are bad-film fanatics anyway, an area in which TURKEY SHOOT delivers in spades.   


Street date: Sept. 22, 2015
Stills used are not taken from Blu-ray

TURKEY SHOOT -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle

MILLENNIUM CRISIS -- DVD review by porfle

 

Originally posted on 2/18/11

 

As Ted Raimi states in one of the DVD's bonus featurettes, you don't see that many low-budget independent sci-fi flicks that are much more than talking heads in rooms, yakking a lot of dialogue at each other. The makers of MILLENNIUM CRISIS (2007) have attempted to sidestep this problem by filling their shot-on-video space opera with plenty of really cheap-looking special effects and hoping we'll like the story enough to play along and really, really suspend our disbelief.

Fortunately, they did a pretty good job of this. The effects shots range from tolerable all the way down to the level of Monty Python-style animation, but I have to give them an A for effort. If you use your imagination, you might get into the cheapo atmosphere after awhile. The sets are minimal--some are even, well, subliminal--but much is done with a little sleight-of-hand and lots of weird lighting effects, with the help of a good ambient musical score by Aaron Paul Low which adds to the dreamlike quality of certain scenes. And yes, the story is interesting enough to have kept all of this from making me switch to hibernation mode.

I had trouble following some of it, but the main gist I got was that in the distant future, the warring Terrans and Andromedeans are enjoying a fragile period of truce. But a race of space vampires known as the Kluduthu are scheming to get everybody at each other's throats again so that they can enslave the survivors and feed off them. Which, I think we can all agree, isn't very nice.


A woman named Aurora (Clare Stevenson), who doesn't know where she came from or exactly what race she belongs to, is kidnapped by Kluduthu leader Harkness (a quietly effective Ato Essandoh of BLOOD DIAMOND) and his android cohort Lucretia (Olja Hrustic, who played one of the "Werewolf Women of the S.S." in GRINDHOUSE) because they suspect her to be the last of a species of aliens known as Bloodmasks, who can mimic the physical characteristics of any other species they come in contact with. Harkness and Lucretia plan to use Aurora to infiltrate a peace conference between the Terrans and Andromedeans and assassinate an important ambassador, thus sparking interplanetary war.

Clare Stevenson is a capable actress who makes Aurora a very likable character. She's a bit like Alice in Wonderland, wandering through one mind-boggling situation after another as she tries to find out who and what she is while doing her best to avoid being used as a secret weapon by the bad guys.

One particularly fun sequence aboard a space freighter has Aurora accidentally awakening some sentient androids, which then automatically awakens a Nosferatu-Class Neuronecromotron (really just an ugly bald guy who scowls and growls a lot) who is programmed to kill anything that moves in order to prevent any of the androids from escaping. I like the way the actors play these wide-eyed, innocent androids, and how Lucretia, the ancient android who's been around the galaxy a few times, sardonically informs them of the fruitlessness of their gosh-a-rootie plan to run away and live in freedom.


Ted Raimi appears in a few sequences as a flaky archeologist named Professor Keene, who gets mixed up in the whole thing and helps Aurora. Ted is probably the most experienced actor in the cast, but he gets barely enough screen time to justify giving him pole position on the DVD cover.

Lindsey Roberts (HUSTLE & FLOW) plays a Kluduthu assassin named Fiona, and if you like coldblooded warrior women she'll probably float your boat. There's a cool swordfight between her and Andromedean agent Murnau (Daryl Boling), in which Fiona just happens to accidentally be topless (oops!) for some reason. It's shot in what comes closest to being an actual honest-to-gosh set, is well-lit and nicely-choreographed, and makes this look a bit more like a real movie for a couple of minutes.

The best part of the movie for me is the Lucretia character. Olja Hrustic is a looker who plays the ages-old android with a cool, cynical detachment and air of mystery and superiority over everyone else. Lucretia's most startling feature is a long, metallic tentacle that springs from I-don't-know-where and can either mess you up, suck your life force, or just screw around with you. That, in addition to a cool chain-mail headdress and tight green bodysuit, helps to make Lucretia one of the most enjoyable visual aspects of the film.


On the negative side, the harsh lighting gets to be irritating from time to time, as does a frequent tendency of the editors to connect a sequence's shots together with an unnecessary white flashing light effect. There's a lot of imagination at work, though, in many of the futuristic elements of the different environments. And some of the images director/co-scripter Andrew Bellware has come up with are rather stunning--there's a reclining shot of Lucretia at about the halfway point that I swear I'd kill to have framed on the wall of my livingroom. Shortly before that, there's another shot of Aurora in repose inside her small living cubicle that would accompany it nicely.

The DVD from Shock-O-Rama cinema is in widescreen with Dolby Digital 5.1 sound.  Bonus features include a director/producer commentary, interviews with Raimi and other castmembers, a visual FX documentary, and a Shock-O-Rama trailer vault.

It's all unmistakably cheap but hardly amateurish. There's a lot of talent evident here, making the best of severely limited resources in imaginative ways, which I will always find just as much fun to watch in its own way as most of the big-budget razzle-dazzle stuff. With an intriguing sci-fi story, a good cast playing interesting characters, and some resourceful talent behind the camera, MILLENNIUM CRISIS manages to rise above its barely-existent budget to become somewhat more than the sum of its parts.

MILLENNIUM CRISIS -- DVD review by porfle

BRUTAL MASSACRE: A COMEDY -- DVD Review by Porfle

 

Originally posted on 7/28/08

 

Although it's been likened to THIS IS SPINAL TAP, writer-director Stevan Mena's BRUTAL MASSACRE: A COMEDY reminded me more of 1993's "...AND GOD SPOKE", a similar mockumentary about bad filmmakers battling their way through a hellish bottom-of-the-barrel production. In that movie they tackled the misguided task of filming the entire Bible on a shoestring budget; here, they're just trying to get through the making of a single craptacular slasher flick alive.

Harry Penderecki (David Naughton) is a low-low-budget horror filmmaker whose previous bargain bin fodder includes titles such as "Fish Who Ate Flesh!", "Bowel Movement", "Saquatch at the Mall", and "I'll Take Back the Ring--And the Finger, Too!" After finally scrounging up enough backing and assembling the most inept cast and crew ever, Harry launches a grueling two-month shoot in the middle of a freezing cold wilderness where everything goes horribly wrong from start to finish.

One thing's for sure, this is definitely my all-time favorite David Naughton performance. He completely inhabits the character of Harry in a wonderfully deadpan way that's consistently right on the mark. I like him better at this age--graying and a little paunchy--than any other time in his career. If he'd started out at this age instead of wasting all those years being young, dancing around drinking Dr. Pepper, starring in failed sitcoms, and being a werewolf, he would already be one of my favorite actors.

The rest of the cast is a delight. Ash's sister Cheryl and girlfriend Linda from THE EVIL DEAD (Ellen Sandweiss and Betsy Baker) are on hand as Harry's frazzled production manager and burnt-out casting director. Ellen's part is bigger and she makes the most of it, her most memorable scene coming when her character, Natalie, tries to empty the filled-to-capacity toilet tank in the location RV and...well, I won't tell you what happens next, but it may be even worse than getting raped by trees. This could be Ellen's "Oscar" moment.

DAWN OF THE DEAD's Ken Foree plays the key grip whose duties increase every time Harry fires someone. Kevin Smith regular Brian O'Halloran plays Jay, the A.D. with ADD. As Harry's loyal East Indian cameraman, Hanu, the diminutive Gerry Bednob gets funnier as the movie goes on. Director Mick Garris and Fangoria's Tony Timpone show up early on as themselves. And playing a (what else?) googly-eyed psycho who may or may not start killing people at any minute is old Leatherface himself, Gunnar Hansen.

At first it didn't seem as though this film was really going to come together. Then, as I got accustomed to its rhythm and low-key approach, I really started to enjoy it. The hilarity isn't non-stop, and there are some slow spots, but just when things threaten to get boring there's another unexpected belly-laugh to goose them again. And as everything grows progressively more bleak and hopeless for our stalwart filmmakers, I almost started to get a BLAIR WITCH PROJECT vibe that somehow enhanced the black comedy.

There's some pretty funny stuff going on here: a key scene is interrupted when the cast and crew discover that they're in the middle of a firing range; after miles of footage is exposed, Harry finds out that his sound man has no idea what he's doing; a group of rowdy local teenagers keeps ruining shots by driving their jeep through them; and the "fake corpse" that Harry's supposed FX expert is secretly laboring on throughout the production turns out to be less convincing than a CPR practice dummy. Aside from this, there are several funny instances of Harry trying to direct his talentless actors through terrible dialogue scenes and ridiculous action.

Of course, Harry's film features the prerequisite blonde bimbos and plenty of boobage. Amy (Emily Brownell) has lofty aspirations both cinematic and intellectual--when asked if she's well-read, she replies, "Well, I read the entire script." Her co-star, the even less intelligent Tanya (Michelle DiBenedetti), has no qualms about exposing her charms on film, reasoning that she's only using what was given to her by God and then enhanced by her surgeon. And as a nod to the kind of flicks this film is spoofing, female characters often find reasons to bend over so the camera can focus on their backsides.

The DVD features 1.78:1 anamorphic widescreen with Dolby 5.1 surround sound. Besides the trailer, extras include several deleted scenes, some of which are really funny (you've got to see Ken Foree and Gerry Bednob furiously wrestling each other to the death in the motel bed that cheap Harry has forced them to share). There's also a behind-the-scenes featurette which is also a mockumentary with everyone still in character, so it's like an addition to the movie itself.

Not on the same level as SPINAL TAP or the other Christopher Guest mockumentaries, with less spontaneity and improvisation, BRUTAL MASSACRE: A COMEDY is still an often giddily funny valentine to low-budget horror fans. It's also the movie that finally, after all these years, has made David Naughton a household name. In my house.

 

BRUTAL MASSACRE: A COMEDY -- DVD Review by Porfle

BEYOND THE SEVENTH DOOR -- DVD Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 10/16/17

 

You never know how a "cult" film is going to strike you.  Will you get caught up in whatever its many devoted fans see in it?  Or will its dubious appeal pass you by completely, making it seem to you like just another cheap piece of dreck? 

The 1987 Canuxploitation thriller (well, sorta) BEYOND THE SEVENTH DOOR hits me about halfway between the two extremes.  I found it entertaining enough for a low-budget effort but I'm not quite moved to go out into the street singing its praises. 

The best thing I can say is that there's plenty of fun to be had for those who appreciate fair-to-bad movies, especially ones that fully and imaginatively utilize their severely limited resources.
 

Serbian writer-director Bozidar D. Benedikt (THE GRAVEYARD STORY) has certainly done so, piecing together various ideal found locations to concoct nothing less than a small-scale subterranean puzzle-maze adventure. 

Ex-con Boris (Serbian actor Lazar Rockwood, THE RETURN) looks up his old girlfriend and former robbery partner Wendy (Bonnie Beck, CITY IN PANIC) and presents her with a proposition: help him get into the castle of the rich old guy Wendy works for so that they can try to find the treasure he's said to be hoarding somewhere within its walls. 

She's hesitant at first, but--long story short--they end up going through with the plan after she's cased the joint, made copies of certain keys, and figured out that the most likely location for a hidden treasure is behind that big locked door in the basement. 

Once they go through it, however, they've just initiated an automated security system (actually more of a game-playing ordeal for the old man's amusement) that will have them scrambling to decipher clues to get them from one room to the next lest they perish in one of a series of diabolical death traps. 

The old man's recorded voice, heard intermittently over a speaker system, promises that if they make it to the end they can keep whatever they find, but as the night wears on and the traps become more and more deadly, this seems unlikely. 

Of course, it all plays like a poor man's version of similar quests in such films as INDIANA JONES AND THE LAST CRUSADE and NATIONAL TREASURE.  But since BEYOND THE SEVENTH DOOR is operating on a budget less than what those films spent on Evian water, it's interesting to watch just what kind of brain-teasing labyrinth of mystery director Benedikt and his crew have been able to come up with.

Like other such stories, it's sort of a condensed version of a cliffhanger serial with each scene building to some impending-doom situation--spikes descending from the ceiling, a sealed room slowly filling with water, walls closing in, etc.--which, while not all that terribly thrilling, manages to keep us interested.

But what really holds our attention is watching the two leads wildly emoting their way through it all, their performances none too polished but brimming with energy.  Pretty Bonnie Beck is capable enough, especially in the quieter scenes, while lanky, angular-looking Lazar Rockwood tends to go off like a bottle rocket every few moments, his performance often resembling one of those manic characters Martin Short is known for.

Both manage to shed some of their clothes along the way as Wendy rips her dress down to her stockings and garters trying to plug up some water-gushing holes in the wall and Boris, to my personal dismay, somehow loses his shirt. 

A sudden, fitful sex scene between the two comes on like a steam-valve burst of nervous energy but mercifully fades out before we go blind, and, without much further ado, the movie sweeps us along toward that 7th door and its final, life-or-death dilemma.

The DVD from Intervision is in 1.33:1 full frame with Dolby sound.  No subtitles. Extras include interviews with Benedikt and Rockwood (and Paul Corupe of Canuxploitation.com), the featurette "The King of Cayenne" about eccentric street personality Ben Kerr (who plays a corpse in the film), and an entertaining audio commentary with Benedikt, Rockwood, and Corupe.

After pleasantly stringing us along for the better part of an hour and a half, BEYOND THE SEVENTH DOOR ends with a rather nifty, and nasty, plot twist that had me feeling pretty satisfied about the whole thing.  I may not become part of the film's cult, but I can sort of understand why there is one.


Buy it at Severin Films

Release date: October 31, 2017

BEYOND THE SEVENTH DOOR -- DVD Review by Porfle

THE BURNING MOON -- DVD Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 2/19/12

 

If you're looking for a pic to put next to the definition of "splatter" in your dictionary, there's a charnel house full of choice moments to choose from in THE BURNING MOON (1997), one of the goriest horror flicks I've seen since H.G. Lewis bought his first bottle of ketchup.  And while the first few minutes of this low-budget, shot-on-video German indy didn't exactly have me tingling with anticipation, it wasn't long before the earnest and surprisingly accomplished effort started to win me over in a big way.

We first meet writer-director Olaf Ittenbach as sullen slacker Peter, a drug-addled leech who'd rather shoot up and rumble with his gang than babysit his cute widdle kid sister.  His job interview sequence is pretty amusing--the interviewer has to remind him of the office's "no smoking" policy as he's rolling a joint--and the gang fight scene later on is nicely chaotic. 

After mainlining some "H" and imagining the moon as a huge, roiling ball of fire, Peter barges into his sister's room and insists upon telling her some horrific bedtime stories.  The first, "Julia's Love", begins with a nice girl named Julia (the cute Beate Neumeyer) enjoying her blind date with a nice guy named Cliff (Bernd Muggenthaler) until a radio news reporter's description of a recently-escaped psycho killer matches Cliff right down to his license number.  She flees his car at the first opportunity but makes the grave mistake of leaving her wallet behind.

What you think will happen next happens next, leading to one grisly and graphic killing after another as Julia's family is reduced in number one by one while she's upstairs.  Here, we get our first good look at Ittenbach's knack for devising convincing and sometimes flabbergasting practical gore effects and then shooting them in creative fashion.  Limbs are hacked off, throats are slashed, heads roll, and one person finds out why a machete definitely doesn't make a good toothpick.  When Julia finally discovers something's amiss, the segment rushes headlong to its exciting bloodbath finale. 

Since li'l sis hasn't quite drifted off to dreamland yet, Peter then proceeds to regail her with his next brain-boggling bedtime tale, "The Purity."  In this one, a series of murders in a small village has everyone blaming a mild-mannered farmer named Justus (André Stryi), although the real culprit is twisted priest Ralf (Rudolf Höß), a sweetly-beaming nutcase whose pious exterior hides the soul of an underworld denizen.  Ralf believes that death is purifying for the soul, and gleefully proceeds to purify several of his fellow villagers by raping, shooting (squibs abound), and throat-slashing (a startling effect). 

As if this weren't enough, the segment ends with one of the innocent Justus' persecutors taking a trip to Olaf Ittenbach's version of Hell, which turns out to be a stomach-churning free-for-all of gore, gore, and more gore.  For about fifteen straight minutes, the screen is filled with some of the most gruesome splatter effects you'll ever see this side of a Tom Savini fever dream. 

It's amazing that the director was able to pull off some of this stuff on such a low budget, it's so well done.  In addition to a veritable ocean of entrails and body parts, we witness a power drill to the teeth, eyeballs plucked out, faces pulled off, and--in what is probably the film's piece de resistance--a guy's legs pulled apart until his body literally splits up the middle.  In other words, it's party time for gorehounds. 

While THE BURNING MOON does look as cheaply-made as it is, Ittenbach's direction and staging are surprisingly sophisticated at times--you can tell that there's a genuinely talented filmmaker at work here, making the best of his limited resources with a good deal of creativity and enthusiasm.  His cast range from adequate to above-average, with Rudolf Höß as Ralf turning in a particularly strong performance and Ittenbach himself not bad as Peter.  Beate Neumeyer makes a winsome Julia in the first story segment while her co-star Bernd Muggenthaler plays the role of Cliff with just the right combination of feigned normalcy and giddy insanity. 

The DVD from Intervision is full-screen with Dolby 2.0 sound (in the original German) and English subtitles.  Extras include trailers for this and two other Intervision features, plus the 47-minute documentary "The Making of 'The Burning Moon'" which is a fascinating behind-the-scenes look at how to put an effective horror movie together on a shoestring.

One of the best of the obscure cinematic curios that Intervision has released so far, THE BURNING MOON ("Uncut, Uncensored, Unconscionable" the box proclaims) rises above its modest budget to provide a wealth of well-rendered shocks to the hardy souls who appreciate this sort of thing.  More sensitive viewers, beware.  Gorehounds, rejoice.

THE BURNING MOON -- DVD Review by Porfle

SLEDGEHAMMER -- DVD Review by Porfle

 

Originally posted on 4/30/11

 

It's always interesting to come across an obscure, previously-unseen example of the classic 80s-era slasher flick.  Few, however, are as obscure as SLEDGEHAMMER (1983),  a super-low-budget chiller with the distinction of being the very first horror movie shot on video. 

Writer-director David A. Prior, who went on to churn out such films as DEADLY PREY and HORROR WORKOUT, chose for his debut feature to delve into the horror genre made popular by such hits as HALLOWEEN and FRIDAY THE 13TH.  After coming up with a screenplay that combined elements of those films with a few ideas of his own, Prior rented some commercial video equipment (thus avoiding the "camcorder" look of many later shot-on-video features), got some actors and friends together in his apartment, and managed to come up with something that a number of devoted fans are still watching and talking about almost thirty years later.

The story is pretty basic.  A prologue shows a "bad mommy" (the cute Mary Mendez) locking her little boy in a closet so she can have some private time with the sleazy lover (Michael Shanahan) she's just left her husband for.  But as they start to "get it on" in the livingroom, someone comes up from behind and bashes them to bits with a sledgehammer. 

Cut to ten years later, when a gaggle of frat rats and their ditzy girlfriends pull up in front of the same house (which is in the middle of nowhere, of course) and come bursting out of their van ready to PAR-TEHHH!  It doesn't take long for them to start getting killed off either one at a time or in pairs (right after having sex, natch) by a big scary-looking guy who wears a Halloween mask and wields a sledgehammer.  Things get interesting when the story takes a supernatural turn, with the killer, the little boy, and the sledgehammer itself appearing and disappearing all over the place, giving us something to ponder about while seeing which of the erstwhile party-hearty bunch will make it out of the house alive.

I couldn't wait for this gang of beer-guzzling idiots to start getting sledgehammered, yet their antics are so ridiculous as to be almost delightfully entertaining in a way.  While the acting isn't as horrible as it might have been and some of the players actually deliver dialogue fairly well, several scenes consist of nothing more than lengthy wide shots in which they all chatter away while engaging in drunken horseplay and, in the film's dumbest sequence, an utterly nauseating food fight at the dinner table. 

I don't know how many guys would actually pour a bottle of mustard on their girlfriend's head as a whimsical lark, but our hero Chuck (the director's brother, Ted Prior) does just that, which doesn't set well with Joni (Linda McGill), who hits him in the face with a pie, setting off a blizzard of flying food.  Later, our fun-loving dolts retire to the livingroom for alcohol-fueled activities such as pouring whiskey over their own heads, licking each other's faces, and falling out of their chairs.  Brawny Bluto-equivalent John (John Eastman), who earlier amazed his friends by stuffing an entire sandwich into his mouth, entertains everyone by acting "gay" and planting a kiss on the lips of lighthearted loner Joey (Steve Wright). 

Amazingly enough, there is some character development in the midst of all this.  Chuck and Joni have some serious scenes in which they discuss his reluctance to get married, while pretty blonde Carol (Sandy Brooke) desperately urges handsome Jimmy (Tim Aguilar) to have sex with her and can't understand (nor can we) why he keeps putting her off.  Perhaps Jimmy is aware of how dangerous it is to have sex in a slasher movie.  Meanwhile, Mary (Jeanie Scheer) simply wishes that Big John would stop licking her face and evolve into something more closely resembling a human being.
 


The first murder comes in the middle of a seance that Chuck has arranged in order to invoke the spirits of the couple who were murdered ten years earlier.  Here, both director Prior and his brother do some of their best work as Chuck dramatically recounts the creepy story (via flashbacks of the entire prologue) complete with some really good lighting and camerawork.  Nobody seems to notice the absence of their murdered friend, but the discovery of two more chums bloodily bludgeoned in bed clues them in that something is amiss.  In true slasher flick tradition, they decide not to flee the house but rather hole up in the livingroom until dawn, whereupon one of them wanders off alone and runs smack dab into the killer. 

This is where the fun really starts, with 6'7" tall Doug Matley stalking the narrow hallway of David Prior's cramped apartment with his sledgehammer, wearing that creepy mask and popping up wherever our heroes least expect it.  That pesky kid keeps turning up, too, and we're never sure what's going on with those two--are they both ghosts?  Is the big guy a grown-up version of the little guy?  David Prior doesn't even know.  Anyway, some fairly exciting mayhem ensues and there's some homestyle gore here and there, too.  Prior shows flashes of style at times and his actors rise to the occasion with some pretty enthusiastic screaming and groveling during the climactic scenes. 

How much you enjoy SLEDGEHAMMER will depend largely on your tolerance for such no-budget shot-on-video fare.  True connoisseurs of such VHS-era exploitation stuff will eat it up, while many viewers will find it unwatchable even though the video quality is good.  The best way to appreciate it is to consider the conditions under which it was made and glean what good things are to be found, while enjoying its entertainingly bad qualities as well. 

Prior does display some imagination in the supernatural aspects of the story, and his staging of scenes within the gloomy, white-walled confines of his sweltering apartment gives the film a strangely oppressive atmosphere.  Not so appealing are the many slow-motion stretches used to pad the film to feature length--while some are eerily effective, others seem interminable.  There is, however, a giddily perverse charm to Chuck and Joni's agonizingly slow romantic stroll in which it takes them two or three minutes just to walk twenty feet. 

The DVD from Intervision Picture Corp., specialists in this kind of old-style VHS fare, is in fullscreen with Dolby Digital sound.  A commentary track and a ten-minute interview both feature Clint Kelly of Riot Releasing patiently coaxing reminiscences about the film from a not-that-excited David Prior.  A second commentary track with Joseph A. Ziemba and Dan Budnik of BleedingSkull.com is unreservedly fannish and a lot more fun.  In addition to trailers for other Intervision releases, there are two brief featurettes--"Hammertime!" with Destroy All Movies!!! author Zack Carlson, and "Sledgehammerland" with Hadrian Belove and Tom Fitzgerald, whose big-screen showing of the film on Halloween 2008 garnered an audience of about twelve stalwart viewers.

While barely qualifying as a "movie" as most people think of them, SLEDGEHAMMER is actually one of the best shot-on-video cheapies I've seen and subsequent viewings have only increased my fondness for it.  If you're nostalgic for the good old days of going to hole-in-the-wall video stores to rent worn VHS copies of horror titles now lost to the depths of obscurity, this odd little artifact of a bygone time will probably be right up your dark alley.

SLEDGEHAMMER -- DVD Review by Porfle

All The Crab Monster Scenes From "Attack Of The Crab Monsters" (Roger Corman, 1957) (video)

Here, gathered for what is certainly the first time anywhere...

(or not)

...are all the crab monster scenes from Roger Corman's "Attack of the Crab Monsters."

(spoilers)

Originally posted on 9/30/18
I neither own nor claim any rights to this material.  Just having some fun with it.  Thanks for watching!

All The Crab Monster Scenes From "Attack Of The Crab Monsters" (Roger Corman, 1957) (video)

CORMAN'S WORLD: EXPLOITS OF A HOLLYWOOD REBEL -- DVD review by porfle

 Originally posted 2/27/12

 

Like HERSCHELL GORDON LEWIS: THE GODFATHER OF GORE, CORMAN'S WORLD: EXPLOITS OF A HOLLYWOOD REBEL (2011) is a fun, well-constructed, and informative documentary tribute to an influential producer-director whose films continue to entertain us.  But while both are loaded with testimonials from friends and coworkers, Corman's are considerably more high-profile.  That's because he gave some of the biggest names in the film industry their first break.

CORMAN'S WORLD takes us from his first screen efforts in the 50s (THE MONSTER FROM THE OCEAN FLOOR, THE FAST AND THE FURIOUS) through his historic association with the groundbreaking American-International Pictures and successful exploitation of the burgeoning teen market, to his break from A-I to form New World Pictures and achieve creative freedom, and all the way to his current cheesy-but-fun monster flicks for the SyFy Channel (SHARKTOPUS, DINOSHARK).

The road is paved with a wealth of fun clips that document Corman's growth as a filmmaker from the crude early efforts such as ATTACK OF THE CRAB MONSTERS, IT CHALLENGED THE WORLD, and THE WASP WOMAN to his more critically-acclaimed Poe adaptations (HOUSE OF USHER, THE PIT AND THE PENDULUM).  "I never had the opportunity to go to film school," he says.  "My student work was being shown on the screen."  Of all his hundreds of pictures, none (save for the anti-racist message film THE INTRUDER with William Shatner, which was a labor of love) ever failed to make a profit, which, to the penny-pinching Corman, was of paramount importance.

The roster of names contributing their (mostly glowing) testimonials reads like a who's who of Hollywood.  Martin Scorsese recalls directing his first studio picture, 1972's BOXCAR BERTHA with Barbara Hershey and David Carradine; Ronny Howard enthuses about his own big break as a director with 1976's car-crash epic GRAND THEFT AUTO; Robert DeNiro and Bruce Dern look back on their early roles in such films as BLOODY MAMA and THE TRIP.

The list goes on--Jonathan Demme, Joe Dante, David Carradine, Pam Grier, Peter Fonda, Jonathan Haze, Polly Platt, Penelope Spheeris, Gale Anne Hurd, John Sayles, Peter Bogdanovich, and William Shatner also pay tribute to Corman, while others such as Eli Roth and Quentin Tarantino, who never worked with him but peg him as a key influence in their careers, testify to his importance as a filmmaker.  Rarely has one man had such a profoundly positive effect upon such a wide array of creative artists.

Aside from a few amusing montages, the lean, straightforward documentary by director Alex Stapleton doesn't try to be cute or to funny things up with cartoony humor or clever cinematic flourishes which, considering the wealth of material at hand, are entirely unnecessary.  Corman himself is seen happily going about his life with wife and producing partner Julie, seemingly as content as ever with the way things have worked out even as he continues well into his 80s.  (A highlight is his being presented, at long last, with an honorary Oscar.)  His own philosophical observations and practical advice regarding the moviemaking business are both fascinating and invaluable. 

Of all the famous faces yakking about Corman during the course of the film, my favorite is longtime associate Jack Nicholson.  The venerable Hollywood legend fondly recalls his early days on such films as THE CRY BABY KILLER, LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS (with its famous "dentist office" scene), and THE TRIP, which he wrote.  Best of all is hearing Nicholson talk about that infamous patchwork quickie THE TERROR (directed in turn by Corman, Francis Ford Coppola, Monte Hellman, Nicholson himself, and possibly others) in which he co-starred with Boris Karloff, Dick Miller, Jonathan Haze, and his then-current wife Sandra Knight amidst sets temporarily left standing from THE RAVEN.

The DVD from Anchor Bay is in 1.78:1 anamorphic widescreen with Dolby 5.1 sound and subtitles in English and Spanish.  Extras include extended interviews, personal messages to Corman, and the film's trailer.

An unexpected moment near the end finds Nicholson suddenly overcome with emotion, on the verge of tears as warm feelings toward his old mentor rush to the surface.  If you can inspire this kind of heartfelt sentiment in a salty old cuss like Jack, then your world must be a pretty nice place to live in.  And CORMAN'S WORLD: EXPLOITS OF A HOLLYWOOD REBEL is an ideal way for us to visit it for awhile.


Buy it at Amazon.com
DVD
Blu-Ray

CORMAN'S WORLD: EXPLOITS OF A HOLLYWOOD REBEL -- DVD review by porfle