HK and Cult Film News's Fan Box

Monday, July 21, 2025

CHILD'S PLAY (Blu-Ray) -- DVD Review by Porfle

 

(Originally posted on 10/11/09. Blu-Ray comments by Ian Friedman.)

 

The last time I saw CHILD'S PLAY (1988) was right after its original VHS release, and I wasn't very impressed at the time. But watching it again for the first time in over twenty years, I'm now of the opinion that this movie is a real hoot.

For those of you who are unaware of the premise, here's the short version: a psycho killer named Charles Lee Ray (Brad Dourif), at the moment of his death, uses black magic to transfer his soul into a "Good Guy" doll--similar to the old "My Buddy" dolls for boys--which is then purchased by Karen Barclay (Catherine Hicks) to give to her little boy Andy (Alex Vincent) for his sixth birthday. The doll, "Chucky", comes to life, kills Andy's babysitter Maggie (Dinah Manoff), goes after a former accomplice who double-crossed him (Neil Guintoli), and then sets his sights on Detective Norris (Chris Sarandon), the cop who killed him and is now investigating Maggie's death. Worst of all, Chucky has discovered that he has the power to transfer his soul into the body of Karen's son Andy, who becomes the killer doll's final target.

Director Tom Holland, who gave us that other modern classic FRIGHT NIGHT (also with Chris Sarandon), doesn't dwell much on violence or gore and gives us just a few cursory nods to the horror genre. Instead, much of CHILD'S PLAY is directed like a tense, 80s-style cop movie with a revenge-crazed killer on the loose who just happens to be an animated doll. Some of the suspense sequences, such as Maggie's murder, remind me of something out of an old Clint Eastwood or Charles Bronson flick. And one scene in which Chucky attacks Detective Norris in his car is pure action-movie stuff, with the out-of-control speeding car crashing through barriers and throwing off sparks as it scrapes against walls.

Chucky himself, as voiced with evil relish by Brad Dourif, is an awesome character. All manner of animatronics, puppets, midgets in suits, and camera tricks are used to convince us that the malevolent doll is alive. Nowadays, of course, they'd just take all the fun out of it by doing the whole thing up with CGI, like George Lucas eventually did with Yoda. Yawn.

The edge-of-your-seat finale takes place in the Barclay apartment, as Chucky goes after Andy with the intent of stealing his body while Karen and Norris try to stop him. This is a harrowing sequence that had me giddy with suspense even as I was groaning at some of the hokier elements (the gun's jammed?) that Holland shamelessly tosses into the mix. At one point, when it looks like the end for Chucky, the little boy gets to deliver an Arnold Schwarzenegger-sized zinger that almost had me howling with laughter. The kid pretty much nails the line, too.

My only complaint is the same one that I recall having back in '88--the ending is one of those "he's dead...he's not dead" things that they used to drive into the ground back in those days. But the whole thing is just so much fun that I didn't really care. Plus, Holland manages to maintain interest during this scene even when he's teetering over the top.

Catherine Hicks gives a really intense performance as Karen, and I just have to say that I find her really likable for some reason. As Detective Norris, Chris Sarandon is his usual cool self, and Alex Vincent does a great job as the cute little kid, Andy, mainly because he is a cute little kid. Neil Guintoli (MEMPHIS BELLE) doesn't get to do much, but his character has some nice hair for a change. Dinah Manoff as Maggie is cute and funny as usual.


The new 2-disc BD/DVD combo from 20th-Century Fox/MGM Home Entertainment is 1.85:1 widescreen with English DTS-HD Master Audio 5.1 and 2.9 audio plus Spanish 5.1 and French 2.0. Subtitles are available in English SDH, Spanish, Portuguese, Chinese, Korean, and French. The image looks great for what was a low-budget horror film, with vivid and properly balanced colors. You can even seen the wires used to make a character fly back during one explosion. There is no sign of any digital encoding errors. The detail displayed by the film is also excellent.

All these years I thought I didn't like CHILD'S PLAY, when all I really needed to do was to get reacquainted with it. Now that it's a couple of decades old and I've begun to feel nostalgic for that era in filmmaking, it has a whole new appeal for me. Besides, it's just a really fun movie.

Buy it at Amazon.com
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Sunday, July 20, 2025

Four Werewolves In One Episode Of... "THE RIFLEMAN"! (video)

 


The episode entitled "The Mind Reader" (S1 E40, 1959)...

...has three guest stars who had appeared or would appear as werewolves.

Michael Landon played the lupine lead in "I Was A Teenage Werewolf" (1957).

Steven Ritch was the title terror in the previous year's "The Werewolf" (1956).

And John Carradine would howl it up in the 1981 Joe Dante classic "The Howling."

This episode is a real werewolf triple-header!

Oh, and the fourth werewolf?

Chuck Connors himself, who co-starred in Fox TV's "Werewolf" (1987)!


I neither own nor claim any rights to this material.  Just having some fun with it. Thanks for watching!



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Saturday, July 19, 2025

ONE STEP BEYOND: THE OFFICIAL FIRST SEASON -- DVD Review by Porfle

 Originally posted on 9/15/09
 
 
Two wonderfully strange television series premiered in 1959. One was Rod Serling's "The Twilight Zone", an anthology that placed normal people into fantastic circumstances that usually involved some kind of ironic twist. The other, which arrived ten months earlier, was also an anthology, and its characters also found themselves in weird situations that were often tinged with irony. 
 
But unlike "Twilight Zone", which was brimming with fanciful situations, imaginary creatures, and science-fiction elements, "One Step Beyond" drew its inspiration from actual accounts of the supernatural which were claimed by the host, John Newland, to be true. 
 
Eschewing the pure fantasy elements of Serling's show, one of the strengths of "One Step Beyond" was the feeling it instilled in the viewer that they were watching something that not only could happen, but could happen to them. Newland constantly reminds us of this in his framing narrations throughout the 22 episodes found in the 3-DVD set, ONE STEP BEYOND: THE OFFICIAL FIRST SEASON. His dignified, rational demeanor lends additional credence to the incredible stories of supernatural phenomena which he relates with such calm conviction and wry confidence. 
 
These tales run the gamut from ghost stories to psychic phenomena and all manner of unexplained occurrences in between. Some, such as "Twelve Hours to Live", stretch their premises a bit thin and don't offer much in the way of surprise or suspense. We know that when Will Jansen (Paul Richards) is trapped in his wrecked car on a deserted construction site and begins crying for help that his wife Carol (Jean Allison) will somehow sense his peril and come to the rescue. The trouble is, it takes her half an hour to do so and the situation gets tiresome pretty quick. 
 
"Echo", with Ross Martin as a man just acquitted of his wife's murder who foresees his own death in a mirror, not only doesn't go anywhere but it doesn't really make much sense, either. Another story whose twist is telegraphed long in advance and then takes forever to arrive is "The Aerialist", with Mike Connors ("Mannix") as a trapeze artist driven suicidal with guilt after he drops his father during the family's act. Still, the young Connors is interesting in the role, and the fact that his faithless wife is portrayed by schlock-film goddess Yvette Vickers is a definite plus. 
 
 
Any quibbles I might have are minor in comparison to the wealth of entertainment value contained in this set. The premiere episode, "The Bride Possessed", gets things off to a chilling start with the great Skip Homeier as a newlywed whose bayou-born wife (Virginia Leith, a fine actress best known as "Jan in a pan" from THE BRAIN THAT WOULDN'T DIE) suddenly starts speaking in an unfamiliar voice and acting like an entirely different person. Skip soon discovers that she's been possessed by the ghost of a woman whose unsolved murder was ruled a suicide. 
 
"Emergency Only" is of interest since it features Marlon Brando's sister Jocelyn as a psychic who warns a skeptical man of the impending disaster that he'll encounter should he board a particular train. In "Epilogue", recovering alcoholic Charles Aidman awakens to find his estranged wife Julie Adams (CREATURE FROM THE BLACK LAGOON) frantically beckoning him to the site of a mine cave-in which has trapped their young son--and in which she herself was buried beneath tons of rock. 
 
"Premonition" is the strange tale of a budding ballet dancer (soulful child actress Beverly Washburn) who adamantly refuses to enter a room after foreseeing her own death beneath a falling chandelier.
Something about this show--whether it was John Newland's assured direction (he helmed all 22 first season episodes and many more), the well-written scripts, or the scintillating subject matter--seemed to inspire several of the guest stars to deliver outstanding performances. 
 
In "The Devil's Laughter", familiar character actor Alfred Ryder is fascinating to watch as a condemned man who must be released after numerous attempts to hang him result in inexplicable failure. (Lester Mathews of WEREWOLF OF LONDON co-stars.) Genre sweetheart Luana Anders is marvelously effective in "The Burning Girl", in which she plays a firestarter whose fits of fear and anxiety prove dangerously combustible. "Get Smart" star Edward Platt plays her father. 
 
"The Vision", about a group of WWI soldiers court-martialed for throwing down their weapons after witnessing a heavenly apparition, boasts a strong ensemble cast including Pernell Roberts (sans toupee'), Bruce Gordon, H.M. Wynant, and Richard Devon. Maria Palmer is heartrending as a lonely wife who finally finds a little romance and affection from a man who isn't there (via a Ouija board) in "The Secret." And Patrick Macnee, not yet one of "The Avengers", is a man whose new wife (Barbara Lord) is having terrible nightmares about their upcoming honeymoon cruise on the grand new luxury liner Titanic in "Night of April 14th." 
 
The best episodes combine moving human drama with situations that are truly unsettling and sometimes downright creepy. One of my favorites is "The Dead Part of the House", featuring another fine ensemble cast. Philip Abbott is a grieving widower moving into a large old house with his sister Joanne Linville (the Romulan commander in the Star Trek episode "The Enterprise Incident") and his young daughter whom he has woefully neglected in his grief. Played by charming child actress Mimi Gibson, the little girl soon discovers that one of the upstairs bedrooms is still occupied by three previous tenants who become her playmates. The only thing wrong with this is--they're dead. Philip Ahn of "Kung Fu" also stars as their wise servant, Song. 
 
 
More eerie encounters with the restless dead include "The Haunted U-Boat", with Werner Klemperer ("Hogan's Heroes") as an unwilling passenger on a German sub that's bedeviled by an unknown entity pounding on the hull to be let in. "Image of Death" is the story of a husband who murders his wife with the help of his lover, only to find that a strange stain on the wall is beginning to resemble the screaming countenance of his dead wife. And "The Navigator" is a seafaring ghost story with Don Dubbins and Robert Ellenstein as a First Mate and Captain whose vessel is steered off-course by a stowaway (Olan Soule) whose body later turns up among the wreckage of a ship that lies along their altered course. 
 
Some of the other notable faces that turn up during the course of the season are Walter Burke (getting to play something besides a leprechaun for a change), Cloris Leachman, Ben Cooper, Sandy Kenyon, Ann Codee (THE MUMMY'S CURSE), Douglas Kennedy, William Schallert, a dark-haired Patrick O'Neal, Reginald Owen, Skip Young, BLADE RUNNER screenwriter Hampton Fancher, Wesley Lau, Doris Dowling, Percy Helton, Sandra Knight, Warren Stevens, Barry Atwater, Jon Lormer, and Robert Webber. 
 
The image quality is very good (in beautiful black-and-white) except for some occasional rough patches. Aspect ratio is 4.3 full-screen with Dolby Digital 2.0 sound. Extras include an extended version of pilot episode "The Bride Possessed", a TV promo, the original Alcoa Aluminum opening, and the cheesy 1990s version of the main titles sequence seen on the Sci-Fi Channel. There's also a brief audio interview with writer Don Mankiewicz, whose account of scripting the episode "Epilogue" casts some doubt on the veracity of these stories--according to him, the producers had temporary dibs on a standing mine tunnel set, and needed him to whip up a story to go along with it! 
 
Rather than wielding a sledgehammer of shock and sensation, ONE STEP BEYOND: THE OFFICIAL FIRST SEASON is filled with the kind of spine-tingling campfire tales that get under your skin and make it crawl. So the next time you're in a spooky mood, this is just the thing for some late-night viewing with the lights off.


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Friday, July 18, 2025

16 WISHES -- DVD Review by Porfle


Originally posted on 11/13/10

 

When you're considerably older than the target audience, watching a Disney Channel teen comedy can be like swallowing a golf ball.  At worst, you choke on it and die.  At best, even successfully swallowing the damn thing can be a distressing experience.  Fortunately, 16 WISHES (2010) isn't quite the painful ordeal I was dreading when I sat down to watch it.

It sure starts out that way, though--when we see Abby (Debby Ryan, "The Suite Life on Deck") pop out of bed and start freaking out because it's her "Sweet 16th" birthday, we instantly hate her.  Abby is spoiled, selfish, obnoxious, cutesy, and kind of an airhead.  She's rude to her mom and dad and little brother Mike (Cainan Wiebe, who looks so much like a young Barry Williams that I half-expected him to start crooning "Clowns never laughed before" at any moment) when they burst into her room with a birthday cake, and throws them out. 

She also can't figure out why her cute neighbor Krista (Karissa Tynes, JENNIFER'S BODY, DEAR MR. GACY), who shares the same birthday, hates her and has always done her best to one-up her in everything.  But we can sympathize, and we've only known Abby for five minutes. 

Naturally, Abby has a best guy-friend named Jay (Jean-Luc Bilodeau, TRICK 'R TREAT) who has always loved her although she doesn't realize it because she's hung up on the dashing school quarterback.  Jay is the male equivalent of Mary Stuart Masterson's character in SOME KIND OF WONDERFUL, along with similar characters in countless other teen comedies.  We know that by the end of the film, Abby will realize how wonderful Jay is, but for now let's pretend that we don't know that.
 

Also, when a magical fairy godmother named Celeste (the pixie-like Anna Mae Routledge, 2012, "Harper's Island") shows up and gives Abby sixteen candles which will grant her the sixteen fondest wishes she's had since she was eight years old, we know that sooner or later these wishes will backfire on Abby and she'll come to realize that her life is just fine the way it is.  But again, for now we'll act like we don't know this, or that Abby is going to come through her impending ordeal a much better person with a greater appreciation for the good things she already has, which is the sneaky hidden lesson 16 WISHES is just itching to spring on unsuspecting teen viewers.

In the meantime, the fun part about the movie is the vicarious thrill of instant wish-fulfillment such as having the coolest clothes, a new car complete with driver's license, intense school-wide popularity, and all sorts of other great stuff that Abby can rub in Krista's face, including having a totally better Sweet 16 birthday party than her.  But then--wouldn't you know it--Abby makes the fatal mistake of wishing that everyone would stop treating her like a kid.  Whoops!  Next thing you know, her parents move her into her own apartment, she gets thrown out of school, and Jay won't let her near him because he's still 17 and she's suddenly (gasp) 21.  Is he nuts?  When I was 17, having a 21-year-old babe stalking me would've been my biggest freakin' wish.
 

The rest of the movie is like a teenybopper cross between "The Twilight Zone" and IT'S A WONDERFUL LIFE, which actually makes 16 WISHES kind of entertaining despite the fact that it's still a candy-coated bubblegum flick with unappealing cinematography and vertigo-inducing camerawork and editing.  While Abby isn't made to suffer the depths of despair that George Bailey went through, her predicament is still interesting enough to make us care about her character, especially when the whole thing teaches her to become a better person which, as I mentioned before, we pretty much knew was going to happen.

The DVD from Image Entertainment is 1.78:1 with Dolby Digital 5.1 surround sound.  No subtitles.  Extras include interviews with the two stars, Debby Ryan and Jean-Luc Bilodeau, which can be a pretty frightening prospect with these Disney Channel movies, but fortunately they're very brief.  There's also a music video with Debby performing the catchy, hook-filled theme song, "A Wish Comes True Everyday", and outtakes during the closing credits.

Once you stop wishing for a really awesome movie and just settle for dumb fun, 16 WISHES isn't all that bad.  As far as swallowing golf balls goes, this one actually went down pretty easy.



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Thursday, July 17, 2025

THE HARDY BOYS: THE MYSTERY OF THE APPLEGATE TREASURE -- Serial Review by Porfle

 


Originally posted on 8/26/21

 

Currently watching: THE HARDY BOYS: THE MYSTERY OF THE APPLEGATE TREASURE (1956), a 19-part serial produced by Disney to be shown in daily installments (approx. 11 minutes each) during consecutive episodes of "The Mickey Mouse Club."

This adaptation of Leslie McFarlane's book "The Hardy Boys: The Tower Treasure" should appeal to fans of the Hardy Boys detective stories by Franklin W. Dixon (a pen name for a stable of largely uncredited writers hired by the Stratemeyer Syndicate publishing company), which debuted in 1927 and remained popular for several decades.

Those who are nostalgic for the kind of clean, wholesome family entertainment created by Disney in the 50s and 60s should also derive great satisfaction from this modest but appealing preteen-oriented serial, filmed mostly on elaborately-rendered soundstage sets depicting the Hardys' entire neighborhood, the Applegate estate, and other Bayport locations.

 



It's just the sort of thing to feed into the adventure fantasies of young boys of the era: Frank and Joe Hardy, sons of famous private detective Fenton Hardy, live in the picket-fence suburbs of the small, mostly quiet town of Bayport, but yearn to be detectives like their father and join him in solving mysteries.

But their father, who's often away from home because of his job, doesn't approve of such dangerous doings, and neither does their spinster Aunt Gertrude, who lives with them and keeps a tight rein on the boys.

Despite this, however, Frank and Joe manage to sneak away from the house often enough to get involved in the mystery of eccentric old Silas Applegate and the fortune in pirate gold that's said to be hidden somewhere on his property, perhaps even behind the wall of a crumbling old tower that looms over his estate, and is sought after by a range of unsavory types.

 

 

In order to appeal to young viewers of "The Mickey Mouse Club", Frank and Joe are a year or so younger here than in the books, their ages ranging from about 12-14. The older Frank is played by Tim Considine, already popular from Disney's "Spin and Marty" series, and the role of younger, more impetuous Joe is the official debut of new Disney star Tommy Kirk, whose considerable acting skills are apparent in his often intense and frenetic performance.

Frank and Joe are typical, identifiable boys for that era, with their flattop haircuts, T-shirts, jeans with the cuffs rolled up, and sneakers--ideal role models to stimulate the vivid imaginations and wish fulfillment fantasies of Disney's young audience.

For female viewers, there's the Hardys' friend Iola Morton, who has a desperate crush on the girl-hating Joe and manages to get herself involved in all the boys' adventures.  Iola is brought to vivid life by the cute-as-a-button Carole Ann Campbell, who had a regrettably brief film and TV career before losing interest in Hollywood and moving on. 

 




Fenton Hardy's character is somewhat changed from the books. To me, he was always a distinguished, quietly dependable and capable Hugh Beaumont type. Here, Russ Conway brings him to the screen as a rather frumpy, almost seedy private detective who lacks empathy with his boys and fails to realize their potential as his successors until it is demonstrated to him.

Oddly, the TV show omits Mrs. Hardy and gives us their Aunt Gertrude (Sarah Selby) as a sort of surrogate mother, considerably softening her literary image as a nagging harridan (I always pictured her as a stern Edna Mae Oliver type). This was done with the belief that it was more acceptable for the boys to disobey their aunt than their mother when sneaking out to pursue their detective work.

The story itself takes its own sweet time unfolding over the series' 19 chapters, as the Hardys deal with crotchety old Mr. Applegate (Florenz Ames), his burly caretaker and plumber Jackley (Robert Foulk), wrongly-accused reform school refugee Perry Robinson (Donald McDonald), and slippery, mischievous ex-convict Boles (Arthur Shields, brother of actor Barry Fitzgerald who appeared with him in John Ford's THE QUIET MAN).

 


Boles may have knowledge of the treasure's whereabouts, Jackley may be crookeder than he seems, cutlass-wielding old Applegate is possibly quite mad, and the whole affair stretches out in unremarkable but quite pleasant fashion until finally Frank and Joe cut through the murky mystery with their burgeoning detective skills and solve the whole thing in a moodily-photographed final chapter that puts them in a modest amount of actual danger.

I don't know if today's kids would have the patience, the desire, or even the ability to get carried along by this kind of low-key, unsensationalistic entertainment. I hope they do, lest they miss something that's actually quite rare and wonderful in its own way. For me, "The Hardy Boys: The Mystery of the Applegate Treasure" is sweet, soulful nostalgia in its purest and most potent form.

 







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Wednesday, July 16, 2025

THE ERRAND BOY -- Movie Review by Porfle



Originally posted on 8/20/17

 

THE ERRAND BOY (1961) recalls the previous year's THE BELLBOY in that we find writer-director-star Jerry Lewis shooting a low-budget black-and-white feature which is simply a plotless series of gags set in one location (in THE BELLBOY it was a busy Miami Beach hotel, while this takes place in and around a bustling movie studio).

There's a semblance of plot involving studio head Brian Donlevy and his obsequious toady, played with verve by Howard McNear (Floyd the barber from "The Andy Griffith Show") but it's just an excuse to give Lewis the run of the place once again, packing each scene with as many imaginative gags as he can devise

Jerry is helped in this task by an excellent cast that also includes Stanley "Cyrano Jones" Adams, Kathleen Freeman, Doodles Weaver, Sig Ruman, Fritz Feld, Iris Adrian, and some surprise guest stars.


Much of it is as laugh-out-loud funny as you'd expect, while the rest is rather hit-and-miss. Jerry, of course, disrupts the orderly filmmaking process at every turn, at one point dubbing his own ear-splitting vocals into a lovely young actress' song interlude and elsewhere attempting to eat a quiet sidewalk lunch on the set of a war film.

The usual bathos occurs when the errand boy befriends some cute little puppets which come to life for him in a dusty storeroom--it's in these moments that Lewis tries too hard to be charming when we really want him to keep making with the funny.

This he does in one of his most celebrated sequences, in which he pretends to be the chairman of the board non-verbally chewing out his underlings while broadly pantomiming the instruments in a blaring big band tune. For this scene alone THE ERRAND BOY is well worth a look for Lewis fans, but it has so much more to offer as well including a raucous, slapstick finale.



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Tuesday, July 15, 2025

Extreme Comedy Reactions #3: Charlie Callas in "The Big Mouth" (1967)(video)


 

 Rex (Charlie Callas) mistakes Jerry Lewis for a gangster who's supposed to be dead...

...and it totally blows his mind.

The resulting extreme comedy reaction is a showcase for Charlie's comedy talents.

 

Video by Porfle Popnecker. I neither own nor claim any rights to this material. Just having some fun with it. Thanks for watching!

 


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Monday, July 14, 2025

The Eating Scene From "The Big Mouth" (1967) (video)

 


In the Jerry Lewis comedy "The Big Mouth" (1967)...

...three great comic actors -- Charlie Callas, Buddy Lester, and Harold J. Stone -- demonstrate their skill at delivering lines while stuffing their faces with food.

 Let's hope this scene didn't require too many takes!

 

Video by Porfle Popnecker. I neither own nor claim any rights to this material. Just having some fun with it. Thanks for watching!

 


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Sunday, July 13, 2025

Extreme Comedy Reactions #2: "The Munsters" s1e6 (video)


 

 Herman Munster's nearsighted doctor (the legendary Paul Lynde)...

...finally gets a good look at him, resulting in one of the most extreme comedy reactions ever. 

 

Video by Porfle Popnecker. I neither own nor claim any rights to this material. Just having some fun with it. Thanks for watching!


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Saturday, July 12, 2025

Extreme Comedy Reactions #1: "Archie's Funhouse" Ep.22 (video)

 


In this brief clip from 60s cartoon "Archie's Funhouse"... 

...Archie says something dumb to his dad, and, instead of merely reacting, his dad literally levitates out of his chair.

 

Video by Porfle Popnecker. I neither own nor claim any rights to this material. Just having some fun with it. Thanks for watching!

 


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Friday, July 11, 2025

Jack Nicholson Is Moved To Tears While Talking About Roger Corman (video)

 


 

 From the 2011 Documentary "Corman's World: Exploits of a Hollywood Rebel"  For our review of the documentary, click here.

 

Video by Porfle Popnecker. I neither own nor claim any rights to this material. Just having some fun with it. Thanks for watching!


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Thursday, July 10, 2025

ROCK THE PAINT -- DVD Review by Porfle

 

Originally posted on 7/2/08

 

Described as a "racially-charged fish-out-of-water basketball movie", director Phil Bertelsen's ROCK THE PAINT is about a couple of Jewish white boys from rural Indiana who endure the usual culture shock when their widowed father gets a teaching job in Newark, New Jersey. The older teen, Josh (Douglas Smith) wants to play basketball, while his nine-year-old brother Tim (Sam Stone) suffers from the delusion that he's an aspiring rapper. As you might guess, both come into conflict with various urban black teens in their new 'hood, while Dad struggles to convince the black students in his class that he's qualified to teach about the civil rights movement in the 60s.

Less than five minutes into the movie, I was already starting to hate these kids. Josh and Tim steal a tractor from the farmer who allows them to live on his land and destroy much of his cornfield just for laughs. This gets the whole family evicted, yet the rebellious Josh is not only unrepentant, but also indignant that they're moving just so Dad can find gainful employment. When the script calls for it, Douglas Smith starts jerking around wildly and bellowing his head off to express intense emotions, but the rest of the time he's barely there.

As Tim, Sam Stone struts around like a pint-sized gangsta, grabbing his crotch and saying stuff like "F--- off, beeyotch!" in what I assume is intended to be comedy relief. In short, he's one of those obnoxious child actors who, instead of really acting, broadly mimics adult performances he's seen. Meanwhile, Christopher Innvar as Dad is about as charismatic as Stephen Lack in SCANNERS.

The black characters consist of the usual types you'd expect. There's Antwon (Kevin Phillips), who's initially hostile toward Josh but warms up to him when they end up on the same Catholic school basketball team. Jas Anderson plays T-Bone, the vile-o-lent tough guy who hates Josh and resents Antwon for betraying their friendship, eventually switching schools and joining the bad guy basketball team. Antwon's deaf sister Keisha (Joanna Hartshorne) provides a momentary bright spot in the story as she and Josh tentatively begin a romantic relationship, but this doesn't really go anywhere.

Most of the story is visually hustled along using montages full of hyperactive editing, spaz-cam, and a nonstop cacophony of songs to clue us in on how to feel each time the scene changes. We know Dad is falling in love with one of his students, a nice Asian lady named Sunny (Karen Tsen Lee), because every once in a while we're shown a few seconds of them holding hands in a cafe or cuddling next to some Chinese dragons. Abrupt transitions lead to scenes with woozy, streaky camera effects to reflect the characters' innermost feelings when they aren't barking awkward dialogue at each other.

Even the big climactic basketball game, presented as a slapdash music-based montage, is drained of any suspense the moment Josh takes the court and his annoying "go white boy" theme starts to play on an endless loop for the rest of the sequence. As expected, the dejected good guy team goes into the locker room down by a huge margin at the halfway point, only to make a miraculous comeback once Josh shows up. The fact that we never see the players and the cheering onlookers in the same shot gives it all a strangely dislocated feeling.

I have to hand it to writer Dallas Brennan for one thing, though--I certainly didn't expect him to end this sequence, and the movie, the way he did. Something totally out of left field happens, and then a couple of brief wrap-up scenes usher us to an unresolved fadeout before we have time to say "Huh?"

The DVD is 1.78:1 anamorphic widescreen with 5.1 Dolby Digital sound. Extras include a behind-the-scenes featurette, deleted scenes, two trailers, and scenes from several festivals, including Tribeca, where the film appears to have been warmly received.

These film festival attendees and various online reviews that I've read express widely-differing reactions to ROCK THE PAINT than mine, so your mileage may vary. For me, though, it was less like rocking the paint and more like watching it dry.

 


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Wednesday, July 9, 2025

THE TRANSFORMERS: THE MOVIE (30th ANNIVERSARY EDITION) -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle



 

Originally posted in 2016

 

I watched an awful lot of afternoon TV back in the 80s, but I somehow missed out on "Transformers."  (Although I did buy my nephew one of the toys for Christmas once.) 

This half-hour cartoon series--some would call it an extended toy commercial--about the never-ending war for planet Earth between two opposing factions of intelligent shape-shifting robots named the Autobots and the Decepticons, who can all turn into various high-powered vehicles or cyber-creatures, ran from 1984-87 and garnered a fervent cult following for which it rated a feature-film treatment in 1986. 

Thus, THE TRANSFORMERS: THE MOVIE (30th ANNIVERSARY EDITION) (Shout! Factory and Hasbro Studios, 2-disc Blu-ray) is a great way not only to catch up on what all the nostalgia's about but also to see it at what I assume to be its very best.


Even for a "Transformers" novice like myself, the 80s nostalgia that this rollicking animated space adventure radiates is intoxicating.  It's old-school anime-style cel animation without the CGI gimmicks.  Even if it sometimes betrays its TV origins, it looks fantastic.  And it has a voice cast that's to short-circuit for. 

The film opens with a pretty spectacular sequence in which a renegade planet-sized robot named Unicron (voiced by Orson Welles in his final film appearance) attacks a peaceful world populated by robots and ingests it for fuel.  The artistic depiction of this massive global devastation is stunning, the first of several more upcoming scenes that will dazzle the viewer.

After a "Superman: The Movie"-style main titles sequence featuring the show's familiar theme song, we then settle into the story proper as our mechanical heroes, the Autobots, thunder into action to stave off an attack from the evil Decepticons in the far-off year of 2005.


No sooner is this action-packed battle over than Unicron shows up and transforms some of the surviving Decepticons into his own personal army with which to defeat the Autobots and steal from them an all-powerful device known as the Matrix of Leadership.  Leonard Nimoy himself provides the voice for Unicron's duplicitous number-one, Galvatron (formerly Megatron), who covets the Matrix for himself.

An interesting side note: the deaths and transformations of several regular characters during this sequence are a result of the scripters' instructions to retire the old line of toys and replace them with new ones for young viewers to covet.  This proved to be more traumatic for fans than anyone expected, especially the intensely dramatic death of the Autobots' leader, Optimus Prime, who passed the Matrix on to new leader Ultra Magnus (voiced by Robert Stack.) 

The rest of the film is a robot vs. robot free-for-all with several cool detours along the way, including a visit to a junk planet with "Monty Python" alum Eric Idle voicing a comedic bot named "Wreck-Gar" who listens to too much Earth television, and an encounter with a race of grotesque mecha-beings whose main form of entertainment is to conduct kangaroo courts in which to sentence strangers such as Hot Rod (Judd Nelson) and Kup (Lionel Stander) to "death-by-sharkticon."


Dealing with these foes leads to the ultimate battle with Unicron (who turns out to be one huge transformer himself) and his dark forces which provides the film with its thrilling finale. By this time, I was finally starting to sort out all the many characters including good guys Hot Rod, Kup (he turns into a pickup--get it?), female robot Arcee, human Spike and his plucky son Daniel--both of whom also get to be transformers by wearing exo-suits--Bumblebee, Blurr, and the diminutive Wheelie.

Much comedy relief is provided by the Dinobots, who lack all social graces, talk in Bizarro-Speak ("Me, Grimlock, want to munch metal!"), and live for the times in which old soldier Kup regales them all with oft-told war stories ("Tell Grimlock about petro-rabbits again!") The Decepticons are also good for a few laughs when their inter-family squabbles escalate into all-out fights for dominance among the different robot clans. 

Character design is good and the backgrounds are often beautiful.  The musical score is okay when we aren't assaulted by bad 80s arena rock (I did enjoy hearing "Weird Al" Yankovic's "Dare to Be Stupid" at one point).


Dialogue ranges from likably dumb ("Your days are numbered now, Decepti-creeps!") to quite good, as in the numerous exchanges between Welles and Nimoy.  Celebrity voice talent also includes Scatman Crothers ("Jazz"), Casey Kasem ("Cliffjumper"), Clive Revill ("Kickback"), Norm Alden ("Kranix"), and Roger C. Carmel ("Cyclonus"). Legendary voice performer Frank Welker takes on no less than six different roles.

The 2-disc Blu-ray set from Shout! Factory and Hasbro Studios gives us both the 1.85:1 widescreen version (disc 1) and the full screen version (disc 2) with English stereo and 5.1 sound and subtitles in English and Spanish.  Remastered from a brand-new 4k transfer of original film elements.  (A steelbook edition and a single-disc DVD edition with only the widescreen version plus digital copy are also available.)

Special features include a lengthy and highly-informative behind-the-scenes featurette entitled "'Til All Are One" (the segment on voice talent is especially fun), several other short featurettes, animated storyboards, trailers and TV spots, and an audio commentary with director Nelson Shin, story consultant Flint Dill, and star Susan Blu ("Arcee").  The cover illustration is reversible.  Also contains the code for downloading a digital copy.

THE TRANSFORMERS: THE MOVIE (30th ANNIVERSARY EDITION) is good old bombastic meat-and-potatoes space opera for kids and adults alike, with a welcome anime flavor.  It should rocket original fans of the show right back to their childhoods (or teenhoods, as the case may be) while gaining new ones such as myself who just love a good mind-expanding sci-fi adventure.  

Street date: Sept. 13, 2016

www.shoutfactory.com
www.hasbro.com

Images shown are not taken from the Blu-ray disc.


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Tuesday, July 8, 2025

SYBIL (1976) -- Movie Review by Porfle

 


 Originally posted on 3/14/21
 
 
Just got done rewatching SYBIL (1976) on DVD. I remember seeing the two-part television premiere and how deeply and profoundly affecting it was. 
 
It's the harrowing story of a young woman, Sybil Dorsett (Sally Field), suffering from multiple personality disorder after years of abuse from a warped, sadistic mother. 
 
Joanne Woodward plays the maternal psychiatrist who struggles to help Sybil survive her emotional ordeal and reassemble her shattered psyche. 

Maybe the most emotionally devastating movie I've ever seen, and, unlike any other film, it keeps me on the verge of tears and beyond throughout most of its running time. 
 
 

 
(The "big chair" scene is especially wrenching, so much so that 80s pop group Tears For Fears referenced it in the title of their album "Songs From The Big Chair.")
 
Most of the film's effectiveness is due to Sally Field giving what may be the best film performance of all time. She's utterly amazing in this, and never got another opportunity to be so good. 
 
Her talent is no longer a surprise, but back then, seeing the actress known mainly for fluff like "Gidget" and "The Flying Nun" deliver a performance like this was nothing short of astounding. 
 
 


It was a once-in-a-lifetime role for her, just as Patton was for George C. Scott, Tuco was for Eli Wallach, Baby Doll was for Carroll Baker, Stanley Kowalski was for Marlon Brando, and Joan of Arc was for Renée Jeanne Falconetti. 
 
But I honestly think that this might top them all, aided in no small part by the great script, direction, supporting cast, and Leonard Rosenman's heartrending musical theme for Sybil.
 
The fact that the veracity of this "true story" has been debunked over the years takes nothing away from it. SYBIL is highly recommended for anyone who wants an intensely emotional viewing experience, one which lingers long after it's over.
 

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Monday, July 7, 2025

DIAMOND HEIST -- DVD Review by Porfle



Originally posted on 3/17/15

 

Imagine sitting down to watch a movie with Michael Madsen and Vinnie Jones called DIAMOND HEIST (2012)--thinking, quite understandably, that it's going to be about a diamond heist--and then finding out that it's a dreary, unfunny crime comedy about two Hungarian schlubs mistaken for a pair of popular male strippers known as "The Magic Boys." (Which, incidentally, was the film's original title.)

Even if you think that sounds like comedy gold, chances are you're going to find this mess disappointing. It's one of those bad direct-to-DVD flicks that guys like Michael Madsen and Vinnie Jones lend their names and faces to for an easy paycheck and then mug their way through like it was a home video. (Which I think would be a cool way to make a living and would totally do myself if I could.)

The story opens with Madsen--in the role of Terence, an eccentric strip-club tycoon and diamond smuggler--smashing a yogurt buffet in the restaurant of the posh London hotel where he lives because he's lactose intolerant and his special goat's milk yogurt is nowhere to be seen. I wasn't sure if this was in the script, or if they'd just secretly filmed him at the craft services table between shots.


There's a lot of crosscutting while the film throws a passel of new characters at us along with some really annoying music and visuals. The best I could decipher it, two male strippers ("The Magic Boys") disappear from one of Michael Madsen's clubs and he sends his mousey assistant "Bad News" to Hungary to find two more. As fate would have it, the two Hungarian schlubs, David and Zoli, are on the run after witnessing Vinnie knocking off a guy, and they end up posing as the missing Magic Boys for free passage to London.

David and Zoli are like a cross between "Dumb and Dumber" and the two "Wild and Crazy Guys" from SNL, when they hit town and are situated in their luxury suite. Bad comedy ensues when they take the stage at Madsen's club and reveal their incompetence while big Mike makes faces and groans.

He later gets the two on their knees at gunpoint in his office and does the whole "I'm the last guy you want to f*** with!" routine, which is always great for a few laughs. Then, inexplicably, he decides that the act will be improved if he forces his right-hand man Splendid Ben (an understandably embarrassed-looking Tamer Hassan, KICK-ASS, FREERUNNER, THE DOUBLE) to join it. You can almost hear "Seinfeld"s Kenny Banya bleating "It's gold, Jerry! Gold!" when the three next appear onstage in full drag. It's as though my sense of humor has been injected with novocaine.


(Meanwhile, elsewhere in London, the REAL Magic Boys also end up on the wrong stage and find themselves getting raped by a hairy, leather-bound gay behemoth. It's fun for the whole family!)

The movie tries to get cute and charming here and there, with one of the Hungarian guys getting cutely chummy with the cute black lady (singer Jamelia as "Cherry Valentine") who works for Mikey as a diamond smuggler but is really not what she seems and zzzzzzzz. As an example of the film's cliched dialogue, the following exchange takes place when he asks about her past:

"That's a bit of a long story."
"I have time."


We find that Cherry's past is actually key to the whole thing, and the lovestruck Hungarian guy decides he must help her in her mission against Mike and/or Vinnie, which is complicated when Vinnie suddenly shows up in London. Things finally perk up when Cherry makes her move during a lavish birthday bash Mike holds for himself, but the whole male stripper angle continues to dumb thing up when the real and fake Magic Boys clash-dance onstage during a lame imitation of the opera scene from THE FIFTH ELEMENT.


The DVD from Random Media is in letterboxed widescreen with Dolby 5.1 sound. No subtitles, but closed-captions are available. No extras.

However lacking it is in other areas, the most disappointing thing about DIAMOND HEIST is that there's no diamond heist. That's like calling a movie GONE WITH THE WIND and not having anything actually blow away. Or changing the name of GONE WITH THE WIND to DIAMOND HEIST.




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Sunday, July 6, 2025

THE KILLING JAR -- DVD Review by Porfle


Originally posted on 2/19/11

 

Stay away from out-of-the-way diners after dark, THE KILLING JAR (2010) seems to be telling us, since you never know what kind of desperate character may come walking in.  And if he looks like Michael Madsen, you know you should've skipped the pecan pie and skedaddled five minutes ago.

This tense thriller by writer-director Mark Young (SOUTHERN GOTHIC) is one of those single-location movies that could easily be performed as a stage play, which means that the focus is on character and dialogue.  Neither are very deep here, but they get the job done pretty well, mainly due to a capable cast. 

Amber Benson (BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER) plays weary waitress Noreen, who dreams of getting out of Silver Lake (where the tourists don't go anymore since the lake dried up) but works in a dingy diner for ill-tempered cook Jimmy (Danny "MACHETE" Trejo).  It's almost closing time on a hot night when news comes over the radio of four grisly murders not far away, with the ill-fated family's killer still at large. 

A likely suspect enters as Noreen is chatting with a mild-mannered traveling salesman named John Dixon (Harold Perrineau, "Link" of MATRIX: RELOADED and REVOLUTIONS) on his way through town.  The stranger is foulmouthed and surly, prompting local deputy Lonnie (Lew Temple, THE DEVIL'S REJECTS) to start Barney Fife-ing him.  This proves to be a bad move, and before long "Doe" is threatening his seven terrified captives with a pump shotgun and getting crazier by the minute.



Michael Madsen does a lot of glorified cameo roles these days, so it's good to see him sink his teeth into a part that's not all that different from the kill-crazy Mr. Blonde of RESERVOIR DOGS, only without the mordant sense of humor.  His "Doe" is scary dangerous in a wary, calculated way and when he goes off and gets violent, the character is coldblooded and unpredictable. 

Young, whose direction is efficient without drawing attention to itself, throws a few curves at us to keep the story moving.  These include the arrival of Mr. Greene (Jake Busey), a shady businessman who's there to meet a Mr. Smith, whom he's never seen before.  Is it Doe, or is Mr. Smith someone else in the diner?  It might even be trucker Hank (the always-fine Kevin Gage of HEAT and LAID TO REST). 

Young builds a fair amount of suspense as Doe singles out his captives one at a time to terrorize and interrogate them, and people do get killed badly.  Still, much of the drama is psychological, so don't expect a gorefest--aside from a couple of grisly shots here and there, you'll have to use your DVD players' frame-advance to see an exploding head or two.  While none of this is unbearably nailbiting and the major plot twists are fairly predictable, the finale is nicely played and ends the movie on a satisfying note.



The DVD from Image Entertainment is in 1.78:1 widescreen with Dolby Digital 5.1 surround sound.  A trailer is the sole extra.

THE KILLING JAR probably won't sear itself into your movie memory banks or have you swooning in cinematic ecstasy, but it's a solid little suspense thriller with some good performances and an absorbing story.  Best of all, it's a chance to see an aging Mr. Blonde at the end of his rope, going mental and getting trigger-happy one last time.  



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Saturday, July 5, 2025

THUNDER ALLEY (1967) -- Movie Review by Porfle

 


Originally posted on 5/26/21

 

Currently watching: the 1967 follow-up to FIREBALL 500 and the last gasp of American-International's Frankie and/or Annette teen pictures, THUNDER ALLEY.

By now, Frankie Avalon has split to do his own thing, so Annette Funicello is left to carry this one with new leading man, teen idol Fabian (who played Frankie's rival in the previous film).

That's not all that has changed. This time, nearly all of the comedy has been scrapped along with any hint of farce, surrealism, cartoony characters, etc. in order to give us a straight-forward racing saga in which people have sex, get wildly drunk at parties where dancing girls strip their clothes off, and try to kill each other on the track, sometimes successfully.

 



As a change of pace, THUNDER ALLEY is actually pretty successful itself. Fabian is just the right choice to play famous driver Tommy Callahan, who has odd flashbacks during a race because of a childhood trauma and accidentally causes another driver's death. This makes him a pariah who is shunned by his peers and thrown out of professional racing.

Annette returns as Francie, a stunt driver working for her small-time entrepreneur dad Pete (Jan Murray) in his "Hell Drivers"-type auto show. When a desperate Tommy comes to Pete for work, he's forced to assume the name "Killer Callahan" to draw curious crowds.

Meanwhile, Tommy's girlfriend Annie (Diane McBain) doesn't like the relationship forming between Tommy and Francie, and neither does Francie's fellow stunt driver Eddie (Warren Berlinger in one of his better roles), who digs her.

 



But while all that romantic stuff is going on, we get to see plenty of real-life stock car racing action and fiery, metal-crunching carnage filmed at actual raceways and worked into the plot as Tommy fights to regain his former glory with the reckless Eddie as a dogged competitor.

To make things even more hairy,  a whole gang of bad guy racers led by hothead Leroy (Michael Bell) are out for his blood.  It all comes down to the big final race, which provides more than enough to delight fans of this kind of action.

Familiar faces dot the supporting cast, including Stanley Adams (Cyrano Jones in "Star Trek: The Trouble With Tribbles"), gorgeous and funny Maureen Arthur (HOW TO SUCCEED IN BUSINESS WITHOUT REALLY TRYING, THE LOVE GOD?), Kip King ("The Rifleman: The Dead-Eye Kid"), and some stalwart holdovers from the beach pictures (Sally Sachse, Mary Hughes). 

 


Replacing previous director and scripter William Asher ("Bewitched") are prolific TV writer Sy Salkowitz and director Richard Rush (HELLS ANGELS ON WHEELS), who would go on to direct such high-profile films as FREEBIE AND THE BEAN, THE STUNT MAN, and COLOR OF NIGHT.

Music is by Mike Curb, with just a couple of racing-related songs on the soundtrack and a single number by Annette (one of her better ones). Fabian, thank goodness, spares us his sub-par crooning but is more than adequate in the lead role. 

 


The borderline sleazy ad campaign for the film includes the tagline "Their god is speed! Their pleasure an 'anytime girl'!" so there's definitely a different audience being targeted this time. Or maybe the same audience, but a little older and looking for some stronger stuff.

Thinking that this late entry in the American-International teen genre would be a weak fizzle, I was surprised to find THUNDER ALLEY even more absorbing than its crash-em-up predecessor. It's by far the better film, thanks largely to director Richard Rush, and one of the most enjoyable films of its kind.


One of director Quentin Tarantino's many visual callbacks: his alternate title for DEATH PROOF (2007), which we see only for a split-second before being replaced by a crude "Death Proof" insert, is obviously inspired by the main title for THUNDER ALLEY.



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Friday, July 4, 2025

FIREBALL 500 (1966) -- Movie Review by Porfle

 


Originally posted on 5/24/21

 

Currently rewatching: FIREBALL 500 (1966). I hadn't seen this one since a primetime TV showing back in the 60s and didn't remember much about it except that it had the same kind of production values, music, and other elements, along with stars Frankie Avalon and Annette Funicello, as the "beach party" movies from which it had evolved.

But despite an opening featuring stop-motion animated cavemen inventing the wheel (courtesy of Art "Gumby" Clokey) and a jokey introduction to Frankie's character as he outruns a pitchfork-wielding farmer defending his amorous daughter, any misconceptions I had about this being a lighthearted comedy farce were soon dispelled.

What "Beach Party" director William Asher and co-writer Leo Townsend have concocted here is about as serious and gritty as this kind of candy-coated thriller can be, with Frankie (now "Dave Owens") a California daredevil descending upon the American South for some of that stock car racing action. He's met with resistance by local racing hero Leander (fellow teen idol Fabian), an arrogant chick magnet who moonlights as a moonshiner.

 


 
Annette's back as the niece of race track owner Chill Wills, but this time her "Jane" character is all in for bad-boy Leander while Frankie has a yen for the more mature Martha (Julie Parrish, THE NUTTY PROFESSOR, "Star Trek: The Menagerie") who wants him both as a lover and a high-speed driver for her illicit booze business, which is overseen by none other than Harvey "Eric Von Zipper" Lembeck in menacing redneck mode as cigar-chomping Charlie Bigg.

The rivalry heats up between the two alpha males both on and off the track, a highlight being their figure-8 "chicken race." When other moonshine drivers start getting run off the road (one is rather grimly killed), Frankie suspects Fabian of playing chicken with them on those dark mountain roads in order to advance his own illegal alcohol business.

Obviously, this high-octane adrenaline rush of a teen flick goes way beyond simply replacing surfboards with race cars, especially when we see Frankie actually having off-screen sex with Julie, in addition to that young driver plummetting to his death off a steep cliff.  None of the adults are played for "old fogey" laughs either--this time, everyone in the cast is a bonafide member of the adult world.

 



Frankie finally gets to play a cool badass here, standing up to IRS agents who want him to go undercover for them and taking on Fabian in a doozy of a fist-fight after getting knocked off the track during a big race. He doesn't even really try to win Annette, preferring Julie's more worldly charms instead.

The former beach bums each get to sing, with Annette luring customers into her uncle's hootchie-kootchie show and Frankie seranading the patrons of a local nightclub. (Fortunately, we're spared Fabian's tone-deaf warbling.) Many familiar faces from the previous films are carried over here either as Leander's groupies or race drivers.

 

 


Once the vehicular manslaughter mystery is cleared up, the film ends with a final championship race that offers car lovers roughly ten minutes of exciting actual footage (filmed, according to IMDb, "at the Ascot and Saugus Raceways near Los Angeles with local color shot in Charlotte, North Carolina") with added rear-projection inserts of Frankie and Fabian going at each other amidst the fiery, fender-bending action.

Thinking this to be simply a dead-end attempt to keep beach-party viewers interested, I was surprised at how much I enjoyed FIREBALL 500 on its own terms as a more serious and at times hardball action flick. Of course, the production values are just as flimsy and TV-movie-level as ever, and the dialogue just as corny, but somehow it all manages to deliver an hour and a half of pulpy fun. 



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