SPOOKLEY THE SQUARE PUMPKIN -- Blu-ray/DVD Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 10/19/17
 

 

It's funny how computer-animated cartoons that would've amazed people and won technical awards back in the 80s have become such an everyday thing now.  Still, I sometimes get a kick out of seeing one of these CGI cartoons with the colorful 3D-ish characters and elaborate backgrounds that remind me of moving Viewmaster reels.  And if the story is engaging enough, all the better.

Disney Junior's SPOOKLEY THE SQUARE PUMPKIN (Cinedigm) meets those criteria well enough for a TV production, at least for me anyway.  The characters are expressive and likable, the settings eye-pleasing, the songs enjoyable, and the story by children's book author Joe Troiano is sweet, simple, and comfortingly predictable.

It all begins when a square pumpkin is discovered in the pumpkin patch of Holiday Hill Farm.  This causes grave unrest among the more intolerant in the garden, embodied by a George-and-Lenny pair of pumpkins ("Big Tom" and "Litte Tom") joined by a weirdly umbilical-like vine and very vocal against any pumpkin who isn't properly round as they are. 

These bullies and their bigotry against anyone different from themselves form the basis for the story's lesson on acceptance, which, thankfully, doesn't pile-drive us quite as much as one might suspect. 

In fact, most of the characters, including friendly scarecrow Jack (the patch's amiable leader), brother and sister bats Boris and Bella (Boris craves bugs while Bella admonishes him for wanting to devour their sentient friends), spiders Edgar, Allan, and Poe ("With an 'E'!"), and vain beauty-queen pumpkin Bobo, are actually more-or-less pretty decent toward Spookley.

Square peg Spookley remains insecure even when his comical spider friends persuade him to enter Jack's "Jack-A-Lympics" competition to decide the Pick of the Patch (mainly so they can get their hands on the candy corn crown). 

Naturally, his unusual shape dooms his chances in each round, inviting a fair amount of thoughtless ridicule from the others.  It isn't until a raging storm hits the farm and everyone comes frighteningly close to a bad end that the little square pumpkin's shape enables him to rescue everyone.

As I said, it's all comfortingly predictable.  I must confess to not knowing just how kids these days react to this kind of stuff--I would've been entranced by it, and even now find it pleasantly watchable.   

The characters are pretty funny, and the frequent song-and-dance numbers--some with backup by Pointer Sisters-like trio "The Honey-Doos" and even a few musical ghosts--not only entertain with their clever lyrics and bouncy choreography but also come and go without outstaying their welcome. 

The 2-disc Blu-ray/DVD combo from Cinedigm is in standard television format with English, Spanish, and French 2.0 soundtracks and English SDH subtitles.  Extras consist of five (non-HD) video storybooks, each based on a Joe Troiano book and lasting about five minutes: The Legend of Spookley the Square Pumpkin, The Legend of Beacon the Bright Little Firefly, The Legend of JellyBean and the Unbreakable Egg, The Legend of Lyla the Lovesick Ladybug, and The Legend of Mistletoe and the Christmas Kittens. 

The first of these, "The Legend of Spookley the Square Pumpkin", is read by none other than Bobby "Boris" Pickett of "Monster Mash" fame.  Pickett also sings the main feature's "Monster Mash"-like end titles song, "The Transylvania Twist."

SPOOKLEY THE SQUARE PUMPKIN is ideal small-scale fun for (say it with me) "kids of all ages."  The little ones won't suspect they're being taught a lesson about tolerance even as Spookley's ultimately heartwarming tale leaves them with a Jack o' Lantern smile.

SPOOKLEY THE SQUARE PUMPKIN -- Blu-ray/DVD Review by Porfle

Slumber Party Girls Meet The Sea Monsters! ("Horror Of Party Beach", 1964) (video)

In this low-budget classic, a teen girls' slumber party is crashed.

Not by boys...

...but by scaly, bloodthirsty mutants from the ocean's depths.

The lucky ones will perish quickly...

...while others are carried away by the horrible creatures!


(Read our review of the movie HERE)


I neither own nor claim any rights to this material.  Just having some fun with it.  Thanks for watching!

Slumber Party Girls Meet The Sea Monsters! ("Horror Of Party Beach", 1964) (video)

MONSTER A-GO GO -- DVD Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 10/19/10

 

I can't really tell you why I love bad movies.  It doesn't make sense.  I mean, some of my favorites, such as TEENAGE ZOMBIES, FRANKENSTEIN'S DAUGHTER, and CURSE OF THE SWAMP CREATURE, are pretty much total, blithering dreck.  Still, there's just something about them that makes them both entertaining and strangely compelling.  But whatever that "something" is, MONSTER A-GO GO (1965) definitely doesn't have it.

It starts out promisingly enough with some of the crummiest-looking opening titles I've ever seen.  As soon as they're over, unfortunately, the movie begins.  "What you are about to see may not even be possible!" declares narrator Herschell Gordon Lewis (of BLOOD FEAST fame) in solemn tones as the military investigate the crash site of a downed space capsule.  Near the prop capsule, which is actually much too small to contain a full-sized human being, a man's body is found mangled and burned by radiation.  (He looks okay to me, but that's what we're told).  We soon learn that the missing astronaut, Frank Douglas, has grown to a monstrous height and is extremely radioactive.

As the killer astronaut wanders around frying people, various military and scientific types investigate and discuss the matter ad nauseum.  The only semi-prominent actor among them, Peter Thompson, who had a fairly busy TV and movie career, was forced to exit the production halfway through, leaving the film a character short.  Writer-director Bill Rebane simply called back actor George Perry, who had played one of the monster's early victims, and recast him as that character's brother, also a scientist.  (The brief closeup of Perry's death-rictus after being fried by the monster is one of the film's few laugh-inducing high points.)

While many cheap sci-fi films of this kind start out with a lot of talky, boring scenes and eventually get interesting as the monster makes more frequent appearances, MONSTER A-GO GO chooses to stick with being talky and boring for its entire running time.  Just about the only sequence with any "pep" is a party scene featuring 20-something teens doing the Twist.  Rebane himself plays a jealous boyfriend who drags his girlfriend away from the party and stops the car on a deserted road for a little necking, where they encounter you-know-who.

The monster, played by eight-foot-tall vaudeville performer Henry Hite, is so rarely seen that we begin to wonder why more footage of him wasn't used, including some shots of him attacking Rebane's character which appear in the trailer but not in the film. There are a few closeups of Hite in his dried-oatmeal monster makeup and glimpses of him stalking around, but for the most part we get either POV shots, nocturnal attacks in which we can't see anything, or lengthy views of the monster's silver-booted feet as he staggers around.
 

The interminable dialogue scenes which are peppered with scattered glimpses of the monster (or, more often, his feet) finally give way to a series of lengthy night shots with military and civil defense personnel standing around in downtown Chicago.  "The long wait began," Lewis tells us, and boy, he's not kidding.  I've had more excitement reading fishing magazines in my doctor's office.  Finally, two of the main characters get outfitted in hazmat suits and follow their geiger-counter readings into the sewer, where astronaut Douglas (inexplicably lacking his monster makeup here) has sought refuge.

With only minutes left in the movie, we're sure that something is finally about to happen.  But guess what?  It doesn't.  As Rebane tells us in the commentary, he wasn't able to film the planned ending, so the story just runs out of gas with some head-scratching narration by Lewis that tries to explain why we've just spent 70 minutes in this cinematic sensory-deprivation tank waiting for a climax that's D.O.A.  There isn't even anything for bad-movie fans to laugh at. 

As it turns out, Rebane ran out of money and had to turn the troubled production (sans ending) over to H.G. Lewis to try and complete.  Lewis filmed a few extra scenes and then cut Rebane's footage together into something that bore just enough resemblance to an actual movie so that he could stick it onto the bottom half of a double bill and run it in drive-ins down South (with ads that openly mock it).  Rebane tells us that he was less than thrilled by the final result, originally titled TERROR! AT HALF DAY and intended as a serious sci-fi thriller.  But it's hard to imagine anyone being able to turn this woodenly-acted and profoundly inept monstrosity into a passably good film. 

For those hardy fans of MONSTER A-GO GO, Synergy Entertainment's "Special Collector's Edition" DVD is definitely worth seeking out.  Aside from the movie, which probably looks about as good here as you're ever going to see it (in full-screen with mono sound), the disc contains two amusing short films by Rebane, "Dance Craze" and "Twist Craze", which come as a refreshingly fun and colorful diversion.  (The three young flappers who do a mad Charleston in "Dance Craze" are awesome.) 

There's also a trailer, a stills gallery, a rather dry director's commentary, and a recent eight-minute interview with Rebane in which he states, when asked about the film's lingering popularity:  "I keep asking myself, 'Why do they want to see sh** like this?'"  Included in the DVD box is a 24-page booklet featuring an in-depth article from "Scary Monsters" magazine, which is cool except that the print is almost impossibly small to read.

The oft-heard term "so bad it's good" is most aptly applied when the filmmakers aimed for something worthwhile and failed miserably.  Here, the combination of a young Bill Rebane's good intentions being thwarted by budget and union problems, his stunning lack of talent as a director and writer, and the fact that his meager footage was placed into the hands of a seemingly indifferent Lewis for completion, makes for a viewing experience so utterly bland it's almost depressing.  It makes one yearn for the coherence and technical prowess of PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE.  It even makes something as profoundly drab as THE BEAST OF YUCCA FLATS seem like an Indiana Jones picture by comparison.  If there's any sort of odd fascination to be had from viewing MONSTER A-GO GO, it would be from how resolutely, almost nightmarishly unentertaining it is. 

MONSTER A-GO GO -- DVD Review by Porfle

CAESAR AND OTTO'S PARANORMAL HALLOWEEN -- DVD Review by Porfle

 

Originally posted on 11/7/15

 

Petulant, petty, puerile, cowardly yet arrogant, incredibly vain, and prone to violent temper tantrums, struggling would-be actor Caesar Denovio is once again the "Ren" to lovable slob Otto's "Stimpy" in their latest laugh-packed horror comedy, CAESAR AND OTTO'S PARANORMAL HALLOWEEN (2015). 

As the hapless half-brothers, Dave Campfield and Paul Chomicki first hit the screen in a reality TV spoof that was aptly titled CAESAR AND OTTO.  After that, they veered into slasher territory with CAESAR AND OTTO'S SUMMER CAMP MASSACRE and CAESAR AND OTTO'S DEADLY XMAS while paying homage to classic horror in the short films CAESAR AND OTTO IN THE HOUSE OF DRACULA and CAESAR AND OTTO MEET DRACULA'S LAWYER. Here, they're back in action facing more supernatural perils in their most fast-moving mashup of the horror genre yet. 

The story starts off running with a hysterical spoof of HALLOWEEN that SCARY MOVIE wishes it had thought of.  In addition to the ghastly sight of Caesar and Otto dressed in drag so that they can score high-paying babysitter jobs, we also get a jab at Dr. Phil thrown in for good measure.  And this is before the credits have even rolled.

Before long the boys find themselves house-sitting for highly unpopular governor Jerry Grayson (series stalwart Ken MacFarlane, THE MILLENNIUM BUG) in a dream mansion that seems too good to be true.  What the governor fails to mention is that it's haunted.  I mean really, really haunted.

This is just the jumping off point for director and co-writer Campfield to start lampooning every fright flick from THE SHINING to PARANORMAL ACTIVITY to INSIDIOUS to THE AMITYVILLE HORROR.  THE EXORCIST is given its due when the boys' roguish dad Fred (Scott Aguilar) shows up and gets possessed (actually, it turns out he's just extremely drunk) which draws the questionable involvement of priests Sean Whalen (LAID TO REST) and Deron Miller (SUMMER CAMP MASSACRE, DEADLY XMAS). 

As usual, rank silliness is elevated to a sort of rough-hewn art form in this installment of the ongoing series, with sharp editing and a cartoon-like pace giving it the giddy feel of a live-action Looney Tune.  The gags are non-stop with barely a breath between them, and most of them score (if not a guffaw, then at least a knowing titter). 

Production values, while still not quite on the level of a Spielberg film, are the most lavish for an entry in this series.  This is probably Dave Campfield's best work as a filmmaker so far (although his first film, the serious thriller DARK CHAMBER, continues to impress). 

Besides its inventive script, the film's main strength is a cast that many indy filmmakers would die for.  Scream queens Tiffany Shepis (BONNIE AND CLYDE VS. DRACULA), Debbie Rochon (THE THEATER BIZARRE), and Brinke Stevens (JONAH LIVES) are on hand along with SLEEPAWAY CAMP's Felissa Rose and Beverly Randolph of RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD. 

Vernon Wells (THE ROAD WARRIOR's iconic "Wez") shows up as an axe-wielding psycho in a creepy old 8mm film the Denovios discover in a hidden room.  Rising stars JamieLee Ackerman and Josephine Iannece make an impression as the mansion's mysterious cook and gardener.  And as the titular non-heroes, Campfield and Chomicki just might be the greatest comedy duo since Abbott and Costello.

The DVD from WildEye Releasing is in anamorphic widescreen with 2.0 sound.  No subtitles.  A wealth of bonus features include two commentary tracks (one with Campfield, Ackerman, and Iannece, the other featuring Chomicki and other cast and crew), a gag reel, a tribute to the late Robert Z'Dar, trailers, behind the scenes videos and podcasts, and the delightful "Son of Piggyzilla" trilogy of shorts about everyone's favorite giant carnivorous guinea pig. 

Several cool Easter Eggs can also be found on the various menus.  Click on everything!  (I'm even mentioned in one of them!)

All the slapstick gore and goofy thrills you expect from a Caesar and Otto flick, and then some, are lurking in the delirious CAESAR AND OTTO'S PARANORMAL HALLOWEEN.  So check it out, but beware--you just might die laughing. 

Official Trailer

CAESAR AND OTTO'S PARANORMAL HALLOWEEN -- DVD Review by Porfle

Which Looks Dumber: "THE GIANT CLAW" or "REPTILICUS"? (video)

Two of the silliest-looking creations in horror movie history...

...are the jerky marionette monsters of "The Giant Claw" (1957) and "Reptilicus" (1961).

But which looks dumber? You decide from the trailers...


I neither own nor claim any rights to this material.  Just having some fun with it.  Thanks for watching!

Which Looks Dumber: "THE GIANT CLAW" or "REPTILICUS"? (video)

"THE PICTURE OF DORIAN GRAY": SEVEN REVEALS (Screen Adaptations of the Novel by Oscar Wilde) (video)

"The Picture of Dorian Gray": Seven Reveals

"The Picture of Dorian Gray" (1945): Hurd Hatfield
"Golden Showcase: The Picture of Dorian Gray" (1961): John Fraser/ makeup by Dick Smith
"The Picture of Dorian Gray" (1973): Shane Briant
"The Picture of Dorian Gray" (1976): Peter Firth
"The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen" (2003): Stuart Townsend
"Dorian Gray" (2009): Ben Barnes
"Penny Dreadful" (2014-16): Reeve Carney

I neither own nor claim any rights to this material.  Just having some fun with it.  Thanks for watching!

"THE PICTURE OF DORIAN GRAY": SEVEN REVEALS (Screen Adaptations of the Novel by Oscar Wilde) (video)

GHOST OF GOODNIGHT LANE -- DVD Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 5/26/14

These days, when you see that a movie has Billy Zane in it, you never know if he's going to actually apply himself or just wander through it until somebody hands him a check.  Maybe it says something for his latest flick, the Dallas-based spookfest GHOST OF GOODNIGHT LANE (2014), that he seems to muster up what comes as close to a performance as you're likely to see from him in something not on the same sea level as, say, TITANIC.

Here, Billy not only displays his best deadpan sense of humor but even wears funny hats as Alan, the crotchety head honcho of a no-budget production facility that churns out crappy movies.  Next to the larger building which houses his soundstage, there's a little old house which is used for editing and other post-production work.  A little old house that's--as Alan and his crew will discover--is haunted.

No time is lost setting things up.  Familiar actor Richard Tyson, who played the bully in THREE O'CLOCK HIGH and also shows up in such films as BLACK HAWK DOWN and BLACK WATERS OF ECHO POND, is the first to die when he's left alone in the house one night to finish editing a sequence and runs afoul of what appears to be a freaky-looking young female ghost who seems very agitated and very angry.  I watched this part right before going to bed, and yes, it did give me the creeps.

After the messy business of  his demise is dealt with (the police rule it an accident) Alan and the rest apply themselves to finishing their latest piece of crap as ominous storm clouds gather around the studio.  We meet his makeup girl Dani (the eternally cute Lacey Chabert), music and sound guy Amin (Lynn Andrews III), fill-in editor/janitor/Dani's boyfriend Ben (Matt Dallas, BEAUTY & THE BRIEFCASE), and the resident needs-a-shower loser Johnny (Adam Whittington), who runs the camera while lusting after actresses such as the plastic-enhanced blonde bimbo Laurel (Christine Bently Quinn).

Creepy-quirky little ghostly pranks occur all morning as you-know-who displays her mischievous side,  while Alan tries to shrug it all off in order to keep everyone from running out on him.  This is made more difficult when Thelma (Allyn Carrell), a weird old lady who claims to have once lived in the little house, suddenly shows up and reveals the whole story of who the ghost is, why she's there, and what she plans to do.  And it ain't pretty.

The movie continues in this vein until finally genre superstar Danielle Harris (HALLOWEEN series, CYRUS, BLACK WATERS OF ECHO POND, CHROMESKULL: LAID TO REST 2, THE VICTIM) as Chloe shows up with fellow thespians Micah (the also-cute Brina Palencia) and musclebound himbo Nico (the not-so-cute John Franklin) to get the ball rolling on what turns out to be the funniest part of the film, the big funky dance scene.  We get to see Alan the director at work here as he urges his performers to be ever more sexy and then foists product placement items upon them in the form of Uzis and "Muscle Milk" health drinks.  ("Muscle Milk" is actually mentioned in the closing credits, making it a genuine product placement item.)

With all this out of the way,  it's finally time for GHOST OF GOODNIGHT LANE to stop farting around and start bringing on the scary, which it does in a big way when the ectoplasm finally hits the fan around the midway point.  Despite all the tongue-in-cheek humor (which continues to amuse even after things get really serious) the story takes a deadly turn involving some pretty effective scares along with wince-inducing violence (one actress is confronted by the decaying, gibbering ghost and is made to slice herself to ribbons with pieces of a broken mirror) and just-plain "WTF?" moments such as one character suddenly flying around the room in fast motion and banging into walls until he's finally sucked through a trapdoor in the floor. 

Director and co-writer Alin Bijan (BELLS OF INNOCENCE) fills the movie with so many shocks both big and small that some of them can't help but score while others fall flat.  (In addition to which, this gang of idiots seems to specialize in sneaking up on each other and going "Boo!")  The ghost, whom we'll come to know as "Carly" (Sophia Arias), is a direct descendant of the stringy-haired young dead girls dressed in rags from such films as THE RING who appear several yards away at first and then instantly jut into screaming close-up, while moving around in jittery, jerkily-edited fast-motion.  One such instance caught on camera made me laugh out loud when budget-conscious Alan remarks, "Was that CGI?  I did NOT approve that."

Before it's all over, we get more cringeworthy instances of self-mutilation (one involving a spinning fan blade), some strange supernatural anomalies, spooky bedroom and bathroom-type scenes with dolls and mirrors, a possession-enhanced catfight (Lacey Chabert punching out Danielle Harris goes on my mental keeper reel), and a bad-CGI-slathered finale.

The DVD from Inception Media Group is in 16x9 widescreen with 5.1 surround sound with English subtitles and closed-captions.  A trailer is the sole extra. (Don't miss the final scene which appears after the end credits have already started rolling.)

At least we get a different set of stereotypes here besides the usual jocks, nerds, and camp counsellors (although there's no shortage of bimbos and horndogs), and the whole thing just kind of ambles along in an agreeable way until some quite watchable mayhem perks up the second half.  And with Billy Zane seemingly enjoying his time spent filming GHOST OF GOODNIGHT LANE, we get to see him actually invest part of his talent into his performance while remaining his casual, Zane-y self.

GHOST OF GOODNIGHT LANE -- DVD Review by Porfle

DEATH PASSAGE -- Movie Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 2/10/17

Red flag: teenagers running around in the woods at night, being menaced by an unseen, err...menace!  Sounds like potential run-of-the-mill generic "dead teenager" fodder, except this time--saints be praised!--it isn't.

Far from the gormless norm, in fact, is the 2015 Australian thriller-chiller DEATH PASSAGE (originally known by the considerably less evocative title "Lemon Tree Passage"), which, while not exactly all-out terrifying, is a shudder-inducing exercise in "eerie."

When three American tourists meet a couple of native Aussies on the beach, the five fun-loving teens share ghost stories around the campfire. One chilling tale involves an unfortunate soul run down one night by careless young joyriders at the crossroads of Lemon Tree Passage, his ghost now said to take the form of a bright light which follows any auto speeding down the dark roadway.

Naturally, they can't resist trying it themselves, and almost immediately the light appears.  Further investigation of the phenomena, however, elevates the situation from a lighthearted lark into a grueling ordeal of terror and death.  Which of course is bad for them, but good for us.

We can see right off the bat that director David Campbell's feature debut is going to be technically well-done, and the script dispenses with the usual stereotypical characters and willfully dumb dialogue in favor of a bit of realism for a change. 

The characters are pretty basic, including Americans Maya (Jessica Tovey, TRACKS, ADORE), her friend Amelia (Pippa Black), and Amelia's younger brother Toby (Tim Pocock).  Australian Geordie (Tim Phillipps), who catches Maya's eye, is pleasant enough, and even the resident "overweight funny guy", Geordie's pal Oscar (Andrew Ryan), is likable enough and doesn't pee on the campfire or light his farts.

The one wild card in this deck, seemingly, is Geordie's weird brother Sam (Nicholas Gunn).  We know Sam is bad news because the film opens with him being haunted by a malevolent supernatural presence which will show up again later while he's in the shower.  We don't know why he's being haunted, but it can't be good. 

Sooner or later, of course, things take a turn for the worst when the entire cast find themselves galumphing around in the pitch black forest at night, hearing far-off screams and seeing elusive lights flashing hither and yon. One by one, they either start to disappear or display strangely unexplained behavior as though possessed by a will not their own.

And this isn't just the usual stalker stuff packed with cheap jump scares.  Campbell and co-writer Erica Brien have a deviously twisty supernatural story to tell here, and they know how to wring all the creepy suspense and eerie atmosphere out of it. 

Things may drag a little at times or become a tad confusing here and there, but for the most part, that dark, foreboding forest becomes a theme park of fear with one dreadful surprise after another. 

After the final revelation comes, DEATH PASSAGE releases us from its cold, slimy grasp and lets us go about our way.  But until then, it's like a deluxe version of one of those creepy campfire tales that chill the blood and make us jump at every sound or movement that comes from beyond the flickering edge of the darkness.

DEATH PASSAGE -- Movie Review by Porfle

RAZORS -- Movie Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 10/25/16

One thing that can really benefit a low-budget indy horror flick is a great found location.  We saw that with PRISON OF THE PSYCHOTIC DAMNED, which took excellent advantage of New York's massive and extremely spooky old Buffalo Central Terminal, and more recently with the Italian zombie fest BURIAL GROUND. 

RAZORS (2016) gets the same kind of mileage out of a big dark old Victorian building (The Electrowerkz in London, England), without which, unfortunately, there would be little to recommend it.

An oddball screenwriting mentor, Professor Richard Wise (Thomas Thoroe), invites six young aspiring authors to the site in order to collaborate on the ultimate horror film script with the crumbling, labyrinthian building as their inspiration. 

One of them, Ruth (Kelby Keenan), has an added writer's aid--she claims to be in possession of a wooden case containing several razor-sharp knives that were the original killing instruments of none other than Jack the Ripper.

Naturally, they begin to experience strange, ghostly happenings and, in Ruth's case, weird dreams foretelling the murders of certain members of the party. Some of them encounter the ghost of a young girl from the Ripper's era who seems to be asking for their help. 

Others see Jack the Ripper himself, dressed in black slouch hat and cloak and in full kill-mode.  As the horror escalates, some of the group begin to suspect Professor Wise of being up to something sinister.

Along with its choice location, RAZORS benefits from good cinematography and a capable cast.  What ultimately does it in, however--besides a disjointed story that never really goes anywhere--is the editing. 

Seldom does a horror film contain such a jumble of montages, collages, and clumps of random images that look more like the editor having fun and making "art" than actually crafting a coherent narrative. 

And despite the film's inherent Gothic atmosphere, there's not much of a scare factor either.  The ghost girl, first seen only in brief glimpses, loses her creepiness when revealed up-close as a chatty costumed child actress in stagey makeup.

Frequent attempts at jump-scares seldom have the desired effect, nor do lots of screaming and occasional indulgences in gore.

Jack himself seems more of an ogrish working-class brute than the usual Victorian gentleman-gone-bad we're used to, and is even less effective when seen as a convulsive shirtless maniac covered in blood. 

I had high hopes for RAZORS due to the poster and stills, which gradually dissipated during the film's less-than-riveting running time.  It's apparently intended as the first in a projected horror franchise, but after the abrupt, lackluster ending, I wasn't exactly yearning for more. 

RAZORS -- Movie Review by Porfle

All The Flying Saucer Shots From "Plan 9 From Outer Space" (Ed Wood, 1959) (video)

"Plan 9 From Outer Space" (1959)

Written, Edited, Produced, and Directed by
Edward D. Wood, Jr.


I neither own nor claim any rights to this material.  Just having some fun with it.  Thanks for watching!

All The Flying Saucer Shots From "Plan 9 From Outer Space" (Ed Wood, 1959) (video)

Criswell's Nuttiest Moments From Ed Wood's "Orgy of the Dead" (1965) (video)

This bizarre 1965 horror/sexploitation film was written by Ed Wood.  

Famous faux psychic Criswell stars as the Emperor of the Night.

"Monsters to be pitied! Monsters to be despised!"


I neither own nor claim any rights to this material.  Just having some fun with it.  Thanks for watching!

Criswell's Nuttiest Moments From Ed Wood's "Orgy of the Dead" (1965) (video)

MURDER PARTY -- Movie Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 3/12/10

 

MURDER PARTY (2007) starts with a neat opening titles montage of Halloween images in an urban neighborhood--jack-o-lanterns on doorsteps, costumed kids running up and down the sidewalks, and a nerdy guy named Chris (Chris Sharp) renting some scary movies on his way home from his job as a parking ticket distributor for the NYPD. He notices a strange black envelope on the sidewalk and picks it up--it's an invitation to a Halloween party. Or, more specifically, a "murder party."

When he gets home to his cramped apartment, he pours a bowl of candy corn and pops in one of the cheapo flicks he's rented. But his cat, Sir Lancelot (Puff Snooty), won't get out of his favorite chair. So the painfully non-assertive Chris decides to skip the movie, don his totally crappy homemade cardboard-and-duct-tape medieval knight costume, and give the "murder party" a go. After all, the name has to be a joke, right? Right? WRONG, CHRIS! It's a REAL murder party!

After a scary trudge through the bad part of town, Chris ends up at an isolated warehouse. Inside, he discovers a small group of costumed goofballs hanging around in a dingy storeroom. There's Paul (Paul Goldblatt, who also did the film's special effects) in a bad Lestat-type vampire suit, Lexi (Stacy Rock), who looks like a poor-man's "Pris" from BLADE RUNNER, Macon (Macon Blair), who has on a werewolf mask but mainly looks like he's dressed as Kevin Smith, and Bill (William Lacey), done up like one of the "Baseball Furies" from THE WARRIORS. There's another girl named Sky (co-producer Skei Saulnier), but she doesn't last long because she's allergic to raisins, and Chris brought some pumpkin bread with raisins in it to the party, and when Sky eats some of it she keels over dead.


Just as Chris is beginning to realize he should've stayed home with his cat, they jump him and tie him to a chair. He soon finds out that they're all aspiring avant-garde artists who plan to murder him in an artistic way in order to impress Alexander (Sandy Barnett), a smug, pseudo-sophisticated art enthusiast, and get a grant from him for up to half a million dollars. Alexander arrives with his new best friend, the dangerous-looking Zycho the Psycho (Bill Tangradi), and announces that they will all stab Chris to death at the stroke of the witching hour. Till then, much interpersonal interplay ensues (augmented by a round of truth-serum injections and other narcotics), while the bound Chris looks on in wide-eyed apprehension.

Well, all of this is very nicely filmed for such a low budget--there's even a special credit for the Steadicam operator--and pretty well acted, and some of it is genuinely funny. But MURDER PARTY is often boring and just a tad too tedious. The truth-serum sequence is fairly deadly, with the cast sitting around on the floor woozily mumbling various confessions that sound mostly improvised, and not very well at that. The constant bickering among the characters also gets rather grating after awhile.


At some point deep into the second half, things finally start to happen. There's a shocking discovery about Alexander, somebody tries to light a cigarette while wearing his mask and sets himself on fire, Zycho finally goes psycho, and everybody else goes psycho, too. There's gunfire, axe wielding, chainsaw swingin', and other violent activities that are about as graphic and realistic as that scene that was tacked on at the end of the movie SNUFF--meaning not all that realistic-looking at all, but sorta fun. Some boobage finally makes an appearance at the eleventh hour, albeit covered with body paint, and there's a frenetic chase when Chris finally makes his escape and runs for his life with two of the others in hot pursuit. One of them is wielding the chainsaw, but it's an electric chainsaw, so he has to keep finding places to plug it in whenever he runs out of cord.

Probably the funniest moment in the whole movie is when Chris locks himself in a closet and the others wait outside for him to come out. He frantically scans the surrounding items--a high-tension spring, a plastic jug, an extension cord, a pulley, a fire extinguisher, an exhaust hose--and just as we expect him to have a brilliant McGyver-type inspiration, he suddenly bursts from the closet with all that junk in his arms, throws it at his pursuers, does a lame fake-out move, and runs away.

Surprisingly, the closing credits for MURDER PARTY are five minutes long. For a minor movie like this, there were a heck of a lot of people working on it, and it looks as though most of them did their jobs pretty well. It's just too bad the collective result couldn't have been more worthwhile. MURDER PARTY isn't all that bad, though, and is sporadically entertaining--I give it two-and-a-half jack-o-lanterns for effort.

MURDER PARTY -- Movie Review by Porfle

CAESAR AND OTTO / CAESAR AND OTTO'S SUMMER CAMP MASSACRE -- DVD Reviews by Porfle

Originally posted on 3/3/09

When I reviewed writer-director Dave Campfield's creepy low-budget thriller DARK CHAMBER a while back, I found an interesting Easter egg on the DVD. It was a promo for something called "The Caesar and Otto Show" and it was pretty darn funny for something that looked like a home video. Campfield played a twitchy, hot-headed, flamboyant (is he a closeted gay or does he just happen to fit the stereotype?) aspiring actor named Caesar, who lives with his big, dumb, terminally-unemployed slob of a half-brother named Otto (Paul Chomicki). Otto barges into Caesar's screen test one day to ask him how to operate the remote control for his TV, and Caesar throws such an entertainingly violent hissy fit that the producers casting the part decide to make a hidden-camera show about them. Thus, "The Caesar and Otto Show" is born.

In the feature film CAESAR AND OTTO (2007), we get to see three episodes of this fictitious reality show as the two morons go about their daily lives unaware that there are dozens of pinhole cameras recording their every dumb move. In the first segment, a theater director (Ken MacFarlane) offers the role of a tough mob boss to Caesar but ends up giving it to Otto after he helps them during a read-through. This prompts the enraged Caesar to stop at nothing to keep Otto out of the play, including trying to run him down "Baby Jane"-style. The second episode introduces their no-good dad Fred (Scott Aguilar), who moves into the boys' apartment after his latest wife kicks him out.

After this comes the season finale, which begins with the tragic death of Otto's goldfish. The drama continues with the return of Otto's ex-girlfriend, a ditzy psychic vibrating with ominous premonitions about their future, and an ill-fated grand scheme by the show's producers to construct a huge television theater connected to the boys' apartment building--without their knowledge--in which the big reveal is to take place before a live audience. When Caesar inadvertently discovers the truth and starts pouring on the histrionics for the hidden cameras, the entire project ends in disaster.

The low budget for this raucous comedy--exactly 707 dollars, we're told--is disguised not only by the hidden-camera premise, but also by the talent and ingenuity of the actors and filmmakers. Here's the rare case in which a project with such meager resources boasts a cast loaded with skilled comic actors and a truly funny script that's kept crackling along by snappy, cartoon-style editing and plenty of old-school slapstick. The DVD itself contains a brief "making-of" featurette, a look at the premiere at Cleveland's Indie Gathering film festival, and a fascinating half-hour interview with the charismatic and funny Joe Estevez (who appears in the sequel).

Dave Campfield is a riot as Caesar, who comes off as a human version of the manic, highly-strung chihuahua Ren from the "Ren and Stimpy" cartoons, with a little Tasmanian Devil thrown in. Caesar sees himself as a great actor even though he's absolutely horrible at it, and, like Bud Abbott and Oliver Hardy (and Ren) before him, thinks he's the brains of the duo even though he's an idiot. Paul Chomicki compliments him nicely as the Stimpy-like Otto, a well-meaning lug who's not much smarter than your average baked potato. (And speaking of "baked", it's nice to see this sort of comedy done without the main characters being perpetually stoned for a change.) As a live-action cartoon done dirt cheap, CAESAR AND OTTO overcomes its budgetary disadvantages with a spunky sense of sheer, kinetic hilarity.

Taking a giant leap from the 707 dollars it took to produce CAESAR AND OTTO, 2008's colorful sequel CAESAR AND OTTO'S SUMMER CAMP MASSACRE is a comparatively lavish (though still very low-budget) epic that places our comic heroes squarely in "slasher spoof" territory with a vengeance. Not only does it feature cool cameos by scream queen Brinke Stevens and Martin Sheen's funnier brother Joe Estevez, but it scores big with the presence of Felissa Rose of SLEEPAWAY CAMP (1983), making it a must-see for fans (like me) of that mind-boggling cult classic. Anyone who is still emotionally scarred by the last shot of that film, when Felissa's character "Angela" reveals her big secret, will know what I'm talking about.

The action shifts into high gear right from the start when a frantic Caesar flies off the handle during a road rage incident and beats up a much larger man, who turns out to be the mentally-challenged brother of the chief of police. "Do you have any idea what happens to people...who beat up the mentally-challenged brother...of the chief of police?" Caesar asks Otto as they pack their bags for a quick getaway. After a trip to the unemployment office (where they encounter Joe Estevez in a brief but funny scene), the two fugitives land an out-of-town job as summer camp counselors. Perfect, right? Wrong, because as we all know, every summer camp has its own serial killer, and this one is no exception.

Ken MacFarlane (the theater director from CAESAR AND OTTO) returns as head counselor Jerry Griffen, a sickly-sweet fruitcake whose assistant, Nurse Helen (Robin Ritter), will inexplicably fall for Otto. The other counselors are comprised of the usual kill-fodder, including a belligerent metalhead named Dick (Felissa Rose's husband Deron Miller, who was a SLEEPAWAY CAMP fan as a child), a narcissistic former swimming champ named Chip (Trai Byers), bubble-brained aspiring actresses Monique and Sylvia (Jen Nikolaus, Dawn Burdue), and the unflappably nice Drew (Avi K. Garg), who remains pleasantly upbeat even when the killer is dismembering him with a shovel. Summer Ferguson and Derek Crabbe are also funny as counselors Giselle and Larry. As a bonus, Scott Aguilar pops up again as Caesar and Otto's delightfully deadbeat dad Fred, who passes the time by rummaging through everyone's tents looking for stuff to steal while Caesar keeps them distracted.

Once again, Dave Campfield is a whirling dervish of cowardly, ill-tempered hilarity as "effete tough guy" Caesar, who often comes off like a cross between a crazed chihuahua and a chicken with its head cut off. Paul Chomicki's Otto is his perfect comedy foil, always enduring his half-brother's endless barrage of slapstick abuse with a dull-witted calm. DARK CHAMBER alumnus Felissa Rose, of course, gives the film a welcome hint of the old SLEEPAWAY CAMP vibe, even favoring us a time or two with her famously creepy "Angela" face. Is she the killer? As Bugs Bunny might say: "Ehhh...could be."

Between Caesar and Fred looting the counselors' tents and Otto scampering through a nauseating falling-in-love montage with Nurse Helen, there's enough bloody mayhem to qualify this as a bonafide summer camp killfest even as the gags fly fast and furious. Richard Calderon's thrifty gore effects are pretty good and include a beheading, a shovel to the chest ("My sweater!"), various dissections and body parts, and a comically harrowing sequence inside the killer's bloody charnel house, during which Caesar, Otto, and Fred come dangerously close to being turned into beef treats.

There are two commentary tracks on the DVD--one with Campfield and co-writer Brendan Smith, the other featuring Chomicki, Calderon, and various cast and crew, and both are entertaining. Along with the film's trailer, there's also a 14-minute featurette, "Behind the Massacre", which offers behind-the-scenes footage and interviews with the cast and crew (actually, much of the cast were also part of the crew), who have fond recollections of the 10-day shoot which took place mostly in California's Topenga Canyon.

It's one thing to be wowed by some 200-million-dollar epic, but to see bright and enthusiastic filmmakers take a relatively miniscule budget and turn it into a delightfully loopy comedy like this is a whole different area of film fun altogether. And thanks to some wonderfully zany performances, frenetic pacing, and screwball situations, CAESAR AND OTTO'S SUMMER CAMP MASSACRE turns out to be quite a bit of bloody good fun, indeed.

Watch the trailer

CAESAR AND OTTO / CAESAR AND OTTO'S SUMMER CAMP MASSACRE -- DVD Reviews by Porfle

Bela Lugosi Meets Killer Octopus in "Bride of the Monster" (1955) (video)

In Ed Wood's classic horror thriller "Bride of the Monster"...

...Bela (with stuntman Eddie Parker) runs afoul of Bela's own killer octopus.

(spoilers)


I neither own nor claim any rights to this material.  Just having some fun with it.  Thanks for watching!

Bela Lugosi Meets Killer Octopus in "Bride of the Monster" (1955) (video)

CAESAR & OTTO MEET DRACULA'S LAWYER -- Short Film Review by Porfle

 

Originally posted on 2/9/11

If you've wondered what those two incredibly not-so-bright half brothers Caesar and Otto have been up to since I reviewed their previous features CAESAR AND OTTO and CAESAR AND OTTO'S SUMMER CAMP MASSACRE, here's an update: in their latest adventure, the dimwitted duo take on one of the world's most notorious bloodsuckers.  Dracula, you ask?  No, worse...his lawyer.

In the 16-minute short film CAESAR & OTTO MEET DRACULA'S LAWYER, slick shyster Jimmy Drainum (Francis Leik) drags our intrepid heroes before a judge to answer for the wrongful death of his client, Steven Dracula.  Steven is Count Dracula's lesser-known brother and is portrayed by Brian Dennehy's lesser-known brother, Ed Dennehy.  Since SUMMER CAMP MASSACRE featured a cameo by Martin Sheen's lesser-known brother Joe Estevez, might an encounter with Frank Stallone be in Caesar and Otto's future?  Or maybe even Don Swayze?

Things look bleak for our hapless heroes when Drainum presents faked evidence such as a video of Caesar and Otto brandishing guns and happily announcing "I just can't wait to kill Steve Dracula with this thing!"   It doesn't help that Judge Stoker Browning, played by Troma head honcho Lloyd Kaufman, is busy tweeting about how hungover he is and the defense lawyer is a ditzy blonde named F. "Bubbles" Cochran (Ashley Wren Collins). 

Dubious eyewitness testimony from Dr. Jekyll (Paul Ehlers) and the Wolf Man (Robert Lee Oliver) doesn't help matters, nor does the presence of Steve Dracula's estranged wife Deborah, played by SLEEPAWAY CAMP's legendary Aunt Martha herself, Desiree Gould.  (Debbie Rochon also appears as a TV news reporter.)  In the end, it looks like the only thing that can save the two innocent lads is an appearance by the deceased himself.

 

As usual, Paul Chomicki is like the human embodiment of Ren's canine pal Stimpy as the addlebrained but easygoing Otto.  Indy auteur Dave Campfield (who also gave us the nifty horror-suspense thriller DARK CHAMBER) is hilarious as ever playing effete tough guy Caesar, a Z-list actor whom we first see getting all excited over a TV news item about "green screen" technology ("Oh, this is good stuff!  Green screen!  Wow!" he effuses while scribbling in a note pad).  Which, coincidentally, is the technique used to put all of these separately-filmed actors together within a still-photo courtroom setting. 

With so many sight gags and one-liners flying all over the place, CAESAR & OTTO MEET DRACULA'S LAWYER is like a Mad Magazine parody come to life.  The pace is furious and the jokes, while hit-and-miss, are non-stop.  Done in black-and-white with a scratchy old-film effect, it's a fond homage to the classic Universal monster movies of the 30s and 40s.  While not yet available to the general public (although you can watch a clip here), it premiered last year at the Fright Night Film Festival and may be included as an extra whenever CAESAR & OTTO'S SUMMER CAMP MASSACRE finally comes out on DVD.  Keep watching that green screen!

 

Caesar & Otto official website

CAESAR & OTTO MEET DRACULA'S LAWYER -- Short Film Review by Porfle

CRISWELL ONSCREEN: All His Ed Wood Movie Intros & Outros (video)

Famed fake psychic Criswell played host for three of Ed Wood's most notorious movies...

...appearing at the beginning and end of each.

(In "Orgy of the Dead" he also played a part within the film itself.)

Criswell wrote his own copy which he read from cue cards...

...delivering it with a blustery aplomb befitting the occasion.


(For an in-depth look at Criswell's role in "Orgy of the Dead", click here)


I neither own nor claim any rights to this material.  Just having some fun with it.  Thanks for watching!

CRISWELL ONSCREEN: All His Ed Wood Movie Intros & Outros (video)

HALLOWEED -- Movie Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 10/11/16

 

People thought I was crazy when I gave STAN HELSING a positive review way back in aught nine, but I showed them...I showed them all. (maniacal laughter)

Now, some may consider me equally crazy all over again, but I just watched the new horror comedy HALLOWEED (2016) and, believe it or not, I didn't hate it. Okay, it isn't great, and it's neither genuinely hilarious nor particularly scary.  But the darn thing's just so good-naturedly innocuous that it sorta grows on you.  You know...like fungus.

One good thing about it is a fair number of big-name guest stars, the first being Tom Sizemore.  He's a hoot in his brief role as a serial killer known as "The Bridgeport Butcher" who's strapped into the electric chair screaming curses at his popcorn-munching, party-hat-wearing audience as they cheer his impending flash-fry.

 

Also on hand are his son Joey (Simon Rex, HOTEL CALIFORNIA, PLEDGE THIS!) and stepson Trent (Shannon Brown, FEAST, CRAVE) to whom the condemned killer exhorts "Finish it for me, Trent! Finish my work! Avenge my death!"

Trent, a serious but troubled type not really keen on becoming a serial killer, moves to another town to escape his past and is joined by Joey, the classic movie stoner who's such a total weedhead that he makes Jeff Spicoli look like Whit Bissell.

The boys end up in a town called Mooseheart, which has its own serial killer legend ("The Candy Corn Killer") upon whom the citizens depend for their dwindling tourist trade.  After moving in with an old-hippie pervert named Lloyd (Robert Craighead in a wildly robust performance), Trent gets a job as a suicide counsellor to be near his pretty new co-worker Madison (the winsome Michelle Mueller, "Family Values") while Joey finds gainful employment as a weed dealer for none other than Danny Trejo (BAD ASS) doing a decent comic turn as "Patch."

 

Trent, unfortunately, runs afoul of the crooked mayor's spoiled-rotten son Connor (Jayson Bernard, "Family Values"), Madison's ex-boyfriend, while he and Joey are also comically harrassed by a pair of local cops, one of whom (Deja Dee, "Halt and Catch Fire") is inordinately fond of cavity searches. 

What really sets events into motion, however, is when people start turning up dead again.  Is it the return of "The Candy Corn Killer"?  Or is Trent really carrying on his stepfather's work?

Most of that stuff that I just said--you know, the "plot" and stuff--can be pretty much disregarded since HALLOWEED isn't exactly a serious thriller.  Most of the situations are of a surreal "MAD Magazine" variety similar to all those SCARY MOVIE sequels that Simon Rex has been in, and the overall mood of the film also resembles that of previous horror spoofs such as STUDENT BODIES and SATURDAY THE 14TH.

One plus is the fact that the comedy dialogue is actually pretty snappy throughout, and everything's done with a loosey-goosey style that never once takes itself remotely seriously.  Even the potentially offensive material is pretty inoffensive since it's just so pleasantly goofy.

 

The story takes it's sweet time getting around to anything "Halloween" related, though, and it isn't until around the halfway mark that we see the killer, a tall, giggling psycho in footy pajamas and a baby mask, dispatch his first victim amidst geysers of blood.  The film alternates equally between horror spoof and stoner comedy after that.

Ray Wise (CHILLERAMA, THE AGGRESSION SCALE, "Twin Peaks") does his usual solid job as a mentally unbalanced judge running for mayor, while Jason Mewes (ZOMBIE HAMLET, SILENT BUT DEADLY) is on hand as Joey's even more spaced-out partner in weed.  (Andy Milonakis of MAC & DEVIN GO TO HIGH SCHOOL also shows up as their junior apprentice but I didn't hold that against the movie.)

While the rest of the cast are fine, Simon Rex as Joey is the main attraction for me.  He's an endearingly dense stoner whose childish, impulsive behavior supplies a steady stream of sight gags and throwaway one-liners without the cliched hippy-dippy space-case approach.

He sorta makes me think of what Eb from "Green Acres" might be like if he were perpetually wasted and even more brain-damaged.  I also like the fact that Joey is gay although he insists that he isn't, except he totally is.  All in all, he gives the film much of its watchability.

HALLOWEED is a pleasant enough diversion, hardly essential yet innocuous and amusing.  As I said, I liked it about as much as I liked STAN HELSING.  That should probably tell you all you need to know about it.

Official website

Our original coverage

HALLOWEED -- Movie Review by Porfle

All The Hideous Sun Demon Scenes From "The Hideous Sun Demon" (1958) (video)

Robert Clarke produced and directed 1958's "The Hideous Sun Demon"...

...and played the title role of a man horribly mutated by radiation.

The rays of the sun transform him into a vicious reptilian creature.

The film's crew consisted of University of Southern California film students...
...and was shot over 12 consecutive weekends for approx. $50,000.

Cast and crew were paid $25 per day.
Much of the cast consisted of Clarke's relatives and friends.

Practical locations rather than sets were used throughout the film.

The impressive monster suit was made for a cost of $500. 
It was built over a diver's wet suit.

Although the film's reviews have been consistently negative...

...it has, over the years, become a fondly-remembered cult favorite.


I neither own nor claim any rights to this material.  Just having some fun with it.  Thanks for watching!

All The Hideous Sun Demon Scenes From "The Hideous Sun Demon" (1958) (video)

SHADOWS LIGHT -- DVD Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 8/1/08

The opening titles sequence of the supernatural thriller SHADOWS LIGHT features an exorcism and contains what are probably the most effective images in the entire movie. Father Cuth Abelard (Tom Phillips), who apparently specializes in such work, succeeds in expelling the evil force but is physically and emotonally exhausted. Thus, he's ordered to return to his hometown in Kentucky for a two-week vacation, little suspecting that here he will encounter the most grueling and perilous good vs. evil battle of his lifetime.

Father Cuth meets a pretty blonde waitress named Dana (Tucky Williams), whose sister Evan (Jessica Kline) works as a stripper. When Evan starts running with a fast crowd that revolves around mysterious local tycoon Ashton Lagares (John Schoering) and eventually becomes romantically involved with him, Dana begins to fear for her safety. And for good reason, since Lagares is a pawn of Satan. Father Cuth discovers Lagares' plot to spread his evil influence over the entire community and beyond, and must spring into action with the help of a warrior angel (Marshall Fields) and an immortal creature known as a Djinn (Vince Bingham), who is part angel and part human but lives in the shadows between their worlds.

Director Stephen Zimmer and his cast and crew display plenty of enthusiasm and conviction, but they generally lack the finesse to carry it out. Action scenes aren't that well-staged, with one lightsaber battle (okay, they're flaming swords, but they look like lightsabers) between Lagares and the Warrior Angel looking particularly awkward. Much of the exposition is conveyed by having people talk while taking leisurely strolls, which tends to get a little repetitive.

As for the acting, there are two or three standouts among the cast, including Cynthia L. Allen as Lagares' delightfully wicked accomplice Lily. A malicious MILF who literally sucks the life out of her hapless male and female partners, Lily is the most interesting and exciting character, and you may be surprised when you see the actress who plays her without the wig and makeup--they look almost nothing alike. Vince Bingham is also good as the Djinn, thanks in large part to a pretty cool makeup job, and Tucky Williams is likable as Dana. The rest of the cast tend to come off as either amateurish or overly melodramatic, but at least they give it their all.

Aside from some nice makeup effects on Lily and the Djinn, we also get a cool Grim Reaper-like creature known as the Soul Collector and a not-so-cool monstrosity that Lagares morphs into right before the climactic battle. The Warrior Angel looks pretty stunning the first time we see him--wings outstretched, eyes aglow, he seems to be wearing a reflective outfit that makes him appear to be made of light. Later, though, he just looks like a guy with a white wig, white clothes, a couple of limp wings sticking out of his back, and boots. It's too bad they couldn't have sustained the impressive effect of that first shot. 

 A lot of poor-man's green screen and cartoony CGI are used here as well, and the effect varies widely in quality. Even when these fantastic creations and visuals aren't entirely successful, however, it's still fun to see talented SPFX artists doing what they can with a meager budget.

The DVD is 1.78:1 anamorphic widescreen with 2.0 sound. There are actually three commentary tracks here--director, cast, and production--along with a photo gallery, a 17-minute featurette of actor interviews, and an almost 40-minute-long conversation between effects artists Dave Workman, Sven Granlund, and Matt Perry.

I can't really urge you to run right out and get SHADOWS LIGHT expecting it to be awesome. As an epic battle between good and evil, its reach exceeds its grasp by a wide margin. But as with all low-budget independent features by filmmakers who actually care about what they're doing, it's interesting to see how Zimmer and company try to overcome their limited resources to create the best and most impressive movie they possibly can.

SHADOWS LIGHT -- DVD Review by Porfle

VERY Visible Stagehand in "HORROR ISLAND" (Universal, 1941) (video)

This long take is really quite nice...

...even when one of the lighting guys appears in the shot.

It's so obvious, he's practically a part of the cast!

Originally posted on 1/28/18
Suggested by Friend of Daniel of the CHFB.  I neither own nor claim any rights to this material.  Just having some fun with it. Thanks for watching!

VERY Visible Stagehand in "HORROR ISLAND" (Universal, 1941) (video)

THE VAMPIRE BAT (1933) -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle

 Originally posted on 4/1/2017

 

Who'd have thought, back when we were watching dark, battered prints of this on public domain DVDs, that one day we'd get to see it on Blu-ray in (almost) tip-top shape and in all its original glory? 

Thanks to a new HD restoration by The Film Detective (in conjunction with UCLA Film & Television Archive) that day is today, and the golden-age horror classic THE VAMPIRE BAT (1933) hasn't looked this good in ages.

Sure, there are still imperfections--this thing is ancient, after all, and has been in the public domain for a very long time--but heck, I love for a film to have SOME imperfections, if only for nostalgic value.

For the most part, however, this cinematic treasure is bright, sharp, and clear, and oh, does that glorious black-and-white photography ever look gorgeous.  Especially when the equally gorgeous leading lady Fay Wray is gracing the screen.

Sharing the cast list with Fay is the exquisitely evil Lionel Atwill as Dr. Otto von Niemann, a scientist--a very mad one, as it turns out--conducting some rather unsavory experiments in the laboratory of his castle in a small German village. 

Fay is his unsuspecting lab assistant Ruth, whose boyfriend, police inspector Karl Brettschneider (Melvyn Douglas) is stymied by a rash of murders in which the victims are found dead in their beds, drained of blood, with two puncture wounds on their throats.

In a reversal of the Van Helsing character in DRACULA two years earlier, Karl is the only man in town who DOESN'T believe the deaths are the work of a vampire.  Everyone else suspects Herman, a half-wit who loves bats (of which the village seems to have an inordinate amount fluttering about and hanging from trees).  

Herman is played wonderfully by the great Dwight Frye, in a performance both disturbing and sympathetic.  Dwight deftly blends elements from some of his other characters such as FRANKENSTEIN's hunchbacked assistant Fritz and the cackling madman Renfield from DRACULA.

Here, however, he's simply a pathetic outsider whom the townspeople regard as a pariah and eventually hunt down as members of the usual torch-bearing mob (with the torches beautifully hand-tinted in color as in the original release prints).

Meanwhile, the vampire murders continue to terrorize the countryside as Atwill's supremely sinister Dr. Niemann carries on his unholy experiments.  As in DR. X. and MYSTERY OF THE WAX MUSEUM before it, THE VAMPIRE BAT features yet another climactic encounter between Atwill and seminal scream queen Fay, while Niemann's assistant Emil (played by Robert Frazer of 1932's WHITE ZOMBIE), under Niemann's hypnotic spell, is ordered to kill Karl in his sleep. 

Scripted by Edward T. Lowe (HOUSE OF FRANKENSTEIN, HOUSE OF DRACULA), this independent production has hints of the Universal Pictures style along with some of their familiar players such as Dwight Frye, Lionel Belmore, and Melvyn Douglas (of James Whale's THE OLD DARK HOUSE).

Director Frank R. Strayer (THE MONSTER WALKS, CONDEMNED TO LIVE) has a restrained yet fluid style during the more frenetic scenes, and a pleasingly stagelike handling of the longer dialogue exchanges. 

While nowhere near as stylish as Whale, Strayer does share that director's fondness for comedy relief in the form of Maude Eburne as Ruth's hypochondriac Aunt Gussie. If you enjoy the comedy stylings of Whale favorite Una O'Connor--I do, many don't--chances are you'll find Eburne a welcome relief from the grim proceedings surrounding her character.

Strayer uses lots of wide shots but then rewards us with some frame-able closeups of the lovely Fay and the not-so-lovely Atwill and Frye.  Production design is well-done and highly atmospheric. Some of the laboratory scenes are rather morbid in this pre-Code era.  There's no musical score save for brief snippets of library music during the opening and closing, but this only adds to the somber mood.

The Blu-ray for this special restored edition is in the original 1.33:1 aspect ratio with Dolby Digital sound. It is, in the words of the press release, "restored from a 35mm composite acetate fine grain master and a 35mm nitrate print."  Extras consist of a charming featurette by Film Detective featuring Melvyn Douglas' son, and a wall-to-wall audio commentary by film historian Sam Sherman which is scholarly and informative. 

It's nice to see this neglected gem reintroduced to the public in this form after languishing in the public domain for so long.  For lovers of vintage black-and-white films, golden age horror, Fay Wray, and classic film in general, watching this version of THE VAMPIRE BAT is like viewing fine art or savoring a vintage wine.  That is, if you drink...wine.

http://www.thefilmdetective.com/

Release date: April 25, 2017

THE VAMPIRE BAT (1933) -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle