GHOST HUNTERS INTERNATIONAL SEASON ONE: PART 1 -- DVD Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 5/20/10

I get scared walking down the dark hallway to my bathroom at night...especially after I've been watching something scary on TV.  So, needless to say, I only watched SyFy's GHOST HUNTERS INTERNATIONAL SEASON ONE: PART 1 in the daytime.  At first, anyway.  Eventually I got to where I was watching it later and later at night.  Not that it isn't spooky, because it is, but it isn't freak-me-out spooky.

This show is a spin-off of SyFy's "Ghost Hunters", and, according to some fan comments I've read, the new team is comprised largely of rejects from that and other shows.  I can only go by what I've seen here but in some cases I wouldn't doubt it.  (More on this later.)  Unlike the USA-bound "Ghost Hunters", the international version takes us to some truly fascinating locations around the world, where the supposed hauntings can date back several centuries.  This set focuses largely on the UK, in addition to scenic places such as Romania, Germany, and New Zealand, where the team gets to nose around in an awe-inspiring assortment of gloomy castles, citadels, and other medieval haunts.

After establishing the ghostly history of a location and setting up their equipment in the most likely spots, it's "lights out."  Imagine going to some of the scariest places on earth and creeping around in the dark all night, actually trying to wake the dead--I kept thinking, "What the hell's wrong with these people?  Are they nuts or what?"  There's a definite vicarious thrill to watching such a thing, imagining how it would feel to be chasing ghosts in Frankenstein's castle or hearing the growl of a devil dog in some pitch-black subterranean dungeon. 

Team leader Robb seems capable and level-headed enough, though a little humor-challenged and stiff.  Second lead investigator Andy refers to himself as the main debunker for the group, and due to his small size is often called upon to climb around precarious places or shinny through creepy crawlspaces with an admirable willingness.  In addition to coordinating the missions, these two meet with the caretakers of each location they explore and present them with the "evidence", or lack thereof, that they gather along with their pronouncement of whether or not a convincing case has been made for an actual paranormal presence.  (Those with a financial interest in the location's tourist-appeal are often visibly disappointed by a negative finding.)

The fact that Robb and Andy are as intent on discerning logical explanations for various anomalies as they are in declaring them "paranormal" adds to the show's credibility.  In one episode, the mysterious recurring aromas of cigar smoke and port wine are discovered by a hair-dryer-wielding Andy to be emanating from the furniture itself whenever it's warmed by the sun.  Strange noises, lights, and other unexplained events are often determined to be caused by any number of mundane things.  Entire segments of GHI, in fact, can consist more of debunking ghosts than encountering them, which some viewers may find boring despite the show's efforts to squeeze dramatic moments out of every creak, bump, shadow, chilly draft, tingly feeling, etc. 

Science guy Barry, an outgoing Irishman with a really bad soul patch, heads up the evidence evaluations.  He also tends to display the classic "feets don't fail me now" reaction to sudden ghostly activity.  Bantam rooster Brian is the "tech guy" in charge of the equipment, but his most notable trait is his confrontational style when dealing with spirits.  During their investigation of an opera house in New Zealand in which the architect is said to have committed suicide, Brian struts around like a twitchy street punk while shouting things like "Your theater sucks!"  I'm thinking that this may be one of the reasons Brian disappears from the show somewhere around episode nine.  His gangly, spikey-haired replacement, Dustin, known for wearing his visor cap upside-down and backwards, tends toward the dorky side but is less abrasive.

Case manager and local-history researcher Donna takes the opposite approach, settling in and spending forever gently and patiently asking questions such as "Do you like to knit or crochet?" to potential entities.  In one episode, this drives the jumpier and less-patient team member Shannon to fake Donna out by reaching around and banging on the wall behind her, leading to the show's first really classic "reality TV-drama" moment--Donna complains to Robb about Shannon's frivolous lack of devotion to their solemn mission and bad blood forms between the two which won't be resolved.  After a couple more episodes in which she clearly appears uncomfortable to be there, Shannon disappears from the show, leaving a triumphant Donna as Queen Bee until an unfortunate reoccurrence of Crohn's disease forces her to drop out.

While the team gathers reams of footage from both video and heat-sensitive cameras, we see little or nothing of the shadowy forms that often have them bug-eyed and breathless.  Most of the evidence comes from their ultra-sensitive sound recorders, which sometimes pick up what could be interpreted as human speech in response to their repetitive questions.  Occasionally a digital photo will reveal something that resembles a face if you use your imagination (which the team tends to do).  Needless to say, watching actual paranormal investigators methodically going about their jobs ain't quite the same as it is in POLTERGEIST.

Little in the way of conclusive evidence is ever found, although it's fun to watch the ghost hunters' reactions to what they call "personal experiences" such as being touched or hearing disembodied footsteps.  (The night-vision camera, which makes them all look like goggle-eyed albinos, gives everything an added element of eerieness as well.)  And the historic locations themselves, including the actual castle in which much of the silent horror classic NOSFERATU was filmed, are fascinating to explore under such ominous conditions.

The 3-disc DVD set from Image Entertainment has an aspect ratio of 1.33:1 with Dolby Digital stereo.  Discs one and two contain four episodes apiece, while disc three has the remaining three episodes and over an hour's worth of deleted and extended scenes.  The packaging is a tad inconvenient, as the discs are stacked on one hub and secured in place by a removable screw.  There are no subtitles or closed-captioning.

Hardier souls who laugh at the thought of ghosts and go traipsing around in dark, spooky places as though it were nothing will probably regard all of this with a derisive chuckle while simply enjoying the scenery.  But if the very idea of real-life hauntings chills your blood as it does mine, then GHOST HUNTERS INTERNATIONAL SEASON ONE: PART 1 should give you a pretty hefty case of the creeps. 

 

GHOST HUNTERS INTERNATIONAL SEASON ONE: PART 1 -- DVD Review by Porfle

CHROMESKULL: LAID TO REST 2 -- DVD review by porfle

(NOTE: This review is based on the unrated director's cut. Originally posted on 9/11/11.)


The tall, skinny, bald guy with the chrome skull-mask, the wicked knife, and the video camera perched on his shoulder like a parrot is back in CHROMESKULL: LAID TO REST 2 (2011) and this time, he's got back-up. 

The last we saw of Ol' Chrome-Dome (Nick Principe) back in the first LAID TO REST (2009), he was lying on the floor of a rural convenience store with his face ripped off and his skull smashed in.  Well, you can't keep a good monster down, so when this sequel picks up right where the last one left off, we see his crew sweep in, dispatch the investigating police, clean up the crime scene, and whisk their boss to an operating room where surgeons labor to save his life and what's left of his face.

It turns out that he's one of those multi-millionaires who can afford to do whatever the heck he pleases and pay people to willingly help him do it, even if that includes setting up an elaborate torture chamber for him (in his chrome-plating factory, naturally) and stocking it with kidnapped young girls.  His right-hand woman, Spann (the ever-popular Danielle Harris) even seems to enjoy her job, as does his main fixer, Preston, who is very well played by Brian Austin Greene. 



Green seems to revel in the Preston role, portraying a borderline psycho who wants to follow in his boss' footsteps by adopting the chromeskull mask and performing his first kills with an almost sexual ardor.  Not only do we get a shocking pre-titles sequence that harkens back to FRIDAY THE 13TH PART 2, but we get a little of PART 5 as well with an imitator going around making like the main man.  This not only gives Green a chance to stretch his acting muscles but also gives gore fans a double dose of carnage.

Like a cross between Jason Voorhees and Mason Verger of HANNIBAL, Chromeskull, now sporting a hideous patchwork face, spends his recovery time stalking a new girl to obsess on now that Princess, his previous object of interest, is out of the picture.  Her replacement is Jess (Mimi Michaels), who has an eye disease that's slowly making her go blind.  In one of the film's first startling kill scenes, Jess' best friend is dispatched in imaginatively gruesome fashion and Jess is abucted, waking up in a casket while being taunted by Preston.  Mimi Michaels plays the role to the hilt, screaming very convincingly and emoting her buns off.

Thomas Dekker returns as Tommy (last seen driving away with Princess in the last film) and gets caught up in the whole mess again, this time coming to the aid of Jess.  They both end up in Chromeskull's factory where they witness some of the film's more elaborate kills, including a virtuoso decapitation and a thing with a spring-loaded blade cluster (a chrome-plated custom job designed by Preston) giving another character a really big smile. 

Other death scenes of interest include a nasty disembowelment (with the victim being portrayed by twins in order to achieve a tricky single take), a head sliced vertically in half like a cantelope, the impromptu chrome-plating of somebody else's head, and another impressive single take in which Chromeskull wipes out a number of cops one after the other in gruesome ways.  The gore effects are achieved, as in the previous film, by combining excellent practical effects with some subtle CGI enhancements. 



Speaking of cops, they're a pretty ineffectual bunch here.  Owain Yeoman plays Detective King, who looks a little young to be heading the precinct, and Christopher Allen Nelson (Beatrix' almost-husband Tommy in KILL BILL) is Max, his best detective.  "Best" being a relative term, since the whole squad amounts to little more than kill fodder for Chromeskull.  When they bust into the chrome-plating factory to rescue Jess and Detective King yells, "You're safe now!", I thought, "Yeah, right."  Hot female detective Holland (Angelina Armani) fares no better.

Gail O'Grady appears as Jess' mother and a grown-up Eric Lloyd (of the SANTA CLAUSE series) is billed as "Geeky Lackey."  The actress who played Princess in the first LAID TO REST, Bobbi Sue Luther, is neither seen here (her flashback scenes were reshot with Allison Kyler replacing her) nor mentioned by name (unless I missed it).  

The DVD from Image Entertainment is in 1.78:1 widescreen with Dolby 5.1 surround sound.  Subtitles are in English and Spanish.  Extras include a commentary with director Robert Hall, co-writer Kevin Bocarde, and actor Brian Austin Green, along with a making-of featurette, deleted scenes, bloopers, and a trailer.  There's also a feature which allows viewers to jump to any one of the various kill scenes.  (Stick around through the closing credits for a two-minute epilogue.)

While the film is pretty fast-paced and the additions to the Chromeskull mythology fairly interesting, I prefer the first film with its creepier settings, more enigmatic killer, more likable characters, and more involving story.  This one has none of its dry humor (Sean Whalen and Kevin Gage are especially missed) and the main girl, Jess, is winsome but not really all that interesting.  Still, CHROMESKULL: LAID TO REST 2 is head and shoulders above most of the cheap slasher flicks being churned out lately, continuing the first film's "cavalcade of cool kills" approach with a little style and a lot of enthusiasm.  And Chromeskull is definitely one of the major movie monsters of the last few decades.

CHROMESKULL: LAID TO REST 2 -- DVD review by porfle

FIVE CORNERS -- DVD Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 2/13/11

One of those nostalgic reveries about living in the Bronx in the early 60s, FIVE CORNERS (1984) is worth watching because the parts that work are pretty good and the parts that don't are oddly interesting.

Like THE WANDERERS, it uses a Bob Dylan song ("The Times They Are A-Changin'", naturally) as shorthand to let us know that an old era is giving way to a new one.  This is also represented by Harry (Tim Robbins), a formerly violent youth converted to peace by the words of Martin Luther King.  Harry plans to become a civil rights worker in Mississippi, but meanwhile he has a more pressing concern--protecting his friend Linda (Jodie Foster) from the man who once tried to rape her (John Turturro as "Heinz") and has just been released from prison.

Robbins gives a restrained performance, Foster is fine as usual, but Turturro is the one to watch.  Striding angrily into the frame as he makes his entrance, he's all repressed hostility and googly-eyed paranoia and we're not sure what he's capable of.  Heinz nurtures the delusion of hooking up with a decidedly reluctant Linda and proves his love by stealing two penguins from the zoo as a gift.  Her refusal sets him off and from that point on his violent, unpredictable actions fuel the story.

What doesn't really work is that the more hardcore stuff is filtered through the same fondly nostalgic haze as the rest of the subplots, as realistic characters rub shoulders with comedic Noo Yawk caricatures.  Todd Graff (better known as "Hippy" in THE ABYSS) plays Linda's excitable boyfriend, Jamie, as though he's projecting for the back rows.  Two flatfoot police detectives enlisted by Harry to help track down a missing Linda also seem a tad too jokey to be involved in such serious business. 

In addition to Harry's uncomfortable meeting with a hostile black activist (Eriq La Salle of "ER") and a couple of nice scenes with his mother, who worries that she'll lose him as she did her "hero cop" husband, the scenes between Heinz and his cheerfully insane mother (Rose Gregorio) are a real highlight.  She's quite a character, and Heinz struggles to break through her blithely oblivious fascade until he's driven to commit one of the most startling acts in the film.

And then, there's the totally unrelated subplot which seems as though it were excised from a more lighthearted film and shoehorned into this one.  Melanie (Elizabeth Berridge, THE FUNHOUSE) and Brita (Cathryn de Prume) are a couple of ditzy "fast" girls, high on pills and sniffing glue, who hook up with two dopey horndoggers for a day of cheap thrills while Melanie's boyfriend scours the neighborhood for her.  Whenever this storyline pops up it's like switching channels between the movie and a weird episode of "Laverne and Shirley."

Direction by Tony Bill is okay but the editing never quite blends these disparate elements smoothly.  Strange that this period film about the 60s should look so much like an 80s flick, which gives it an oddly interesting visual quality.  (Unless I'm mistaken, the same bar where Frankie Five Angels almost gets whacked in GODFATHER PART II shows up here.)  Also of interest is the score, which, aside from a couple of really nice cues, is pretty awful--thus giving us a chance to observe the great James Newton Howard still finding his way as a film composer in this early effort.

The DVD from Image Entertainment is in 1.78:1 widescreen with Dolby Digital 2.0 sound and English subtitles.  The sole bonus feature consists of about half-an-hour of trailers for this and other Handmade Films releases. 

Turturro's character carries FIVE CORNERS and keeps us involved as the rest of the film's patchwork elements exude their own modestly peculiar charms.  Elizabeth Berridge is a delight as Melanie--I'd like to see the rest of the movie she was plucked from.  I won't even go into the part where there seem to be Eskimos in the Bronx, shooting people with arrows.

FIVE CORNERS -- DVD Review by Porfle

MULTIPLE SARCASMS -- DVD Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 8/8/10

Back in the old days when I owned the only VCR in the family, my sisters would go to the video store and come back with bags full of chick flicks, which I would have to suffer through.  I'm not sure if even they would've enjoyed writer-director Brooks Branch's MULTIPLE SARCASMS (2010), but, to be fair, I suspect that they still would've derived some mysterious and indefinable emotional sustenance from it which totally escapes me.

A disheveled Timothy Hutton plays Gabriel, who wanders through the movie being vaguely dissatisfied with his life as a successful architect with an attractive wife (Dana Delaney as "Annie") and a darling daughter, Lizzie (India Ennenga), both of whom love him.  Sounds great, but darn it, he isn't living his life--it's living him!  (Or something like that.)  So he decides to let everything go to hell while he writes a play which, conveniently, is about his life so that he can put all of his self-pity into words while striving to "find himself."

Mira Sorvino is Cari, a fantasy BFF who's inexplicably supportive and excited about everything Gabe does, while Stockard Channing is his agent Pamela who urges him to complete the play so they can dish it up to an eager public.  Poor Gabe, however, can't do that because he doesn't know how the story comes out yet--he must finish wrecking his life before he can write the ending.  So whenever he breaks up with Annie, fritters away his job, publicly humiliates his daughter, or makes a drunken pass at Cari, we next find the soulful scribe hunched over his typewriter recording it all for posterity. 

Gabe says repeatedly that he doesn't know why he feels "shitty" about his relatively good life, and neither do we.  So why should we care?  He's a one-man self-pity party obsessively scrutinizing himself through a whine-o-scope and it gets old really fast.  After awhile, in fact, he starts to come off less as a troubled aspiring artist and more like a guy who's developing serious mental problems.

The film shuffles from one dull dialogue scene to the next with Gabe either being passively confrontational with Annie, seeking support from Cari or his sympathetic gay co-worker Rocky (a semi-amusing Mario Van Peebles), or proving to Lizzie (and us) that he's still a really good dad so that we'll sympathize with him, too.  As you might guess, each foray into the turbulent terrain of his aching heart is accentuated by tender acoustic guitar and piano ballads by the likes of Yusuf "Cat Stevens" Islam. 

Some of these scenes, particularly one between Gabe and Cari in her office, are just plain drama-class awful, the actors coming off as jaded old pros noodling over their lines together without putting any real effort into them.  The script isn't much help, as in this exchange between Annie and Gabe:

"I love you, but..." (pause) "I am really angry..." (pause) "inside."
"We need to get ourselves back, Annie."

Young India Ennenga as Lizzie gives what is probably the film's best performance and gets to deliver one of its few really funny lines to Hutton:  "I don't know, I guess I'm just PMS-ing or something--you know, like you and Mom?"  Dana Delaney does her best with a thankless role, almost making me forgive her for ruining TOMBSTONE, while Mira Sorvino has very little to work with. 

The DVD from Image Entertainment is in 1.78:1 widescreen with Dolby Digital 5.1 surround sound.  Subtitles are in English and Spanish.  Extras include a "making of" featurette, cast and crew interviews, and a trailer.

After you're done giggling at the clever title, MULTIPLE SARCASMS offers little in the way of amusing comedy or interesting drama.  In one scene, Stockard Channing as Gabe's brassy agent Pamela pretty succinctly sums up what I've been thinking throughout the film:  "Gabriel, I love you, I really do, but this f**king whining white guy shit has gotta stop."

MULTIPLE SARCASMS -- DVD Review by Porfle

FADE TO BLACK -- DVD Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 10/25/10

 

Oliver Parker's FADE TO BLACK (2006) has been described as "a movie lover's movie."  Or, more specifically, an old movie lover's movie, since you have to be reasonably familiar with early 20th century cinema in order to really appreciate it.  First off, you have to know who Orson Welles was.  Which, unfortunately, leaves out a large percentage of the current moviegoing public.

For the rest of us, the fact that Danny Huston is portraying a young Welles in an apocryphal tale of post-war intrigue and murder during a film shoot in Rome is a pretty enticing lure.  All that's needed is for Huston to give us a convincing portrayal of Welles, and for writer-director Oliver Parker to deliver a story that takes full advantage of its potential.  Which, more or less, is what they did.

Having just split from his beautiful actress-wife Rita Hayworth and finding his career in a bit of a slump, Welles arrives in a politically-volatile Rome in 1948 to star as Cagliostro in a Dumas adaptation called "Black Magic", while also trying to get a film version of "Othello" off the ground (at least this much is true).  It's fun watching Welles try to insinuate his directorial influence into the not-so-great production which clearly seems beneath him, while getting a vicarious look at the inside workings of the famous Cinecitti studios. 

During a take, the company is shocked when a costumed extra named Dellere (Frano Lasic), whom Welles has met previously, staggers into the frame and dies after whispering a single word: "Nero."  The police deem it a drug overdose, but a dubious Welles starts delving into the mystery himself, with the help of his young Italian bodyguard Tommaso (Diego Luna).  Tommaso, an ex-cop, leads Welles into a dark world of political intrigue and danger where shady government officials and crime bosses such as "Lucky" Luciano threaten the overly-inquisitive thespian with death or, even worse, professional disgrace.


The tangled plot is pretty easy to follow if you just ignore most of it.  What's really interesting is the idea of lanky, ego-driven sophisticate Welles weaving his way through all this cloak-and-dagger stuff like a character from one of his own movies.  It takes a while to become accustomed to Danny Huston in the role--he looks the part, but you miss that familiar voice.  Huston, in fact, sounds more like his father, legendary filmmaker John Huston, than the bass-toned Welles.  But he gives it his best shot, and it eventually becomes less of an effort to accept him in the role. 

I like the humorous touches such as Welles' frustration with playing second fiddle to his ex-wife in the public eye (reporters keep calling him "Mr. Hayworth"), and a throwaway shot of the slender Welles eagerly stuffing himself with delicious Italian food in an open-air restaurant (we all know where that's going to go).  Huston acquits himself convincingly in the more dramatic scenes, whether romancing a reluctant Italian actress named Lea Padovani (Paz Vega), whom he discovers is linked directly to the murder of Dellere, or venturing into perilous situations where he doesn't belong and then having to sweat his way out of them. 

Interestingly, director Parker, who helmed 2007's I REALLY HATE MY JOB (which I really hated), makes little attempt to imitate any kind of late-40s filmmaking style.  Although the rich colors and noirish lighting are evocative of the era, the look of FADE TO BLACK is a somewhat mismatched combination of formal style and hand-held naturalism which I could never totally settle into.  This isn't a big problem, though, and the modern-looking photography makes the "Black Magic" rushes and silent-movie clips that we see (which are very well-done) look more convincing by contrast.  Some of Parker's quirky editing choices, while not always successful, are interesting as well.


As the likable Tommaso, Diego Luna (MILK) ably conveys the inner conflict that motivates his character to overcome his fears and plunge into political turmoil, while his loyalty to the impetuous Welles draws him into even deeper peril.  Paz Vega (SPANGLISH) is okay as Lea, although I never found her convincing as the stunningly glamorous film star whom Welles is supposed to find so irresistible.  In a minor role as Welles' CIA-connected friend Pete Brewster, Christopher Walken gives the film some poster-friendly star power just by strolling through it.

The DVD from Image Entertainment is in 2.35:1 widescreen with Dolby 5.1 surround sound and English and Spanish subtitles.  The sole extra is the film's trailer. 

While hardly memorable, I found FADE TO BLACK a diverting "what if" tale that takes a while to get warmed up but eventually begins to pay off for the patient viewer.  The idea of Orson Welles as the reluctant hero in a real-life thriller which rivals the fictional intrigue of his own movies is fun, and Parker and Huston just manage to pull it off.  I wonder, though--if they ever decide to give John Huston the same treatment, who are they going to get to play him?

FADE TO BLACK -- DVD Review by Porfle

THE HILLS HAVE EYES (1977) -- DVD Review by Porfle

 Originally posted on 9/16/11

 

Back in the 80s when I was compulsively renting more videos than I would ever be able to remember, two of Wes Craven's more notorious horror classics passed through my VCR and then went swirling off into the recesses of my mental abyss.  A while back I revisited one of them, THE LAST HOUSE ON THE LEFT, and found it to be a disappointment.  Now comes the other one, THE HILLS HAVE EYES (1977), also enjoying a new DVD release, and this time the revisit is a welcome experience. 

Craven seems to have improved as a filmmaker between these two flicks, and so has his choice of actors.  The look of the film still betrays the low budget and Craven's inexperience, yet there is some style and he does a good job of staging scenes within cramped confines (car, camper trailer) while also taking good advantage of the Mojave desert's wide open spaces.  His cast is better here, too--while their thespian skills aren't always up to par, they handle the more hotly emotional material with abandon. 

Naturally, the older cast members are the most skilled.  Veteran actor John Steadman, best remembered by me as "Pop" in the original THE LONGEST YARD, plays Fred, proprietor of a "last chance" gas station in the middle of nowhere.  Russ Grieve and Virginia Vincent (I WANT TO LIVE!, THE RETURN OF DRACULA) are Bob and Ethel Carter, who stop by for a fill-up before taking their family into the desert while vacationing after Bob's retirement.

Old Fred tries to warn them to stay clear of the area, knowing that there's a family of vicious cannibals out there led by his own son, Jupiter (James Whitworth, TERMINAL ISLAND), a misshapen, split-nosed giant with a mean streak a mile wide.  The Carters, of course, disregard Fred's warnings and are subsequently terrorized by the murderous savages until forced to throw off their veneer of civilization and fight back in kind.

Craven takes his time introducing us to the family, gradually allowing a sense of dread to creep in after they break down in the desert.  While not entirely realistic, they're more three-dimensional and less cartoonish than most of the characters in LAST HOUSE, and the awful comic relief that marred the earlier film is mercifully lacking here. 

The hill people are barely glimpsed at first but their presence is felt as their actions become more overt.  When Bob takes a nocturnal hike to Fred's gas station for help, Jupiter's sudden entrance is a shocker that would be imitated in "Friday the 13th Part 2."  What happens after that is a starkly violent descent into nightmare that keeps the story gripping and fast-paced until the very end.

Future fan fave Dee Wallace makes her third film appearance as Lynne, whose husband Doug (Martin Speer, who resembles a "Simpsons" character) is along for the trip.  Robert Houston plays her brother Bobby Carter, an insecure teen trying to prove himself to a domineering father.  Susan Lanier doesn't make much of an impression at first as flighty younger sister Brenda, but when the action starts and she goes into screaming panic mode, her ability to totally freak out is striking. 

On the other side, James Whitworth is an imposing Jupiter, especially when he's berating a "civilized" captive while munching on his barbecued arm.  Legendary actor Michael Berryman, whose career has spanned everything from ONE FLEW OVER THE CUCKOO'S NEST and STAR TREK IV: THE VOYAGE HOME to the more recent THE DEVIL'S REJECTS, lends his eerie Boris Karloff-like countenance to the film and its poster as Pluto.

The attack on the Carters' camper by Pluto and his equally animalistic brother Mars (Lance Gordon) is one of the film's most harrowing setpieces and demonstrates to the viewer that no character is safe from brutal death.  The unnerving capper to the scene is the kidnapping of Lynne's infant daughter as a future feast for the cannibals.

HILLS kicks into high gear when the surviving Carters decide to fight such savagery with a little savagery of their own, proving surprisingly adept and creative at the task even as certain aspects of it are a terrible affront to their humanity.  They're aided in this by Jupiter's daughter, Ruby (Janus Blythe in a fine performance), who rebels against the brutality of her family and puts her own life in danger by helping the strangers. 

Jupiter's final assault on the campers is a thrilling sequence in which they counterattack with amazing ingenuity, but it's the grueling hand-to-hand fight between Doug and Mars which really punctuates all that's gone before (the very last shot is stunningly good).  Here, Craven gives the film one of the most effective abrupt endings I've seen, akin to a writer dotting his last sentence with a sharp jab of the pen.   

The DVD from Image Entertainment's "Midnight Madness" series is in 1.85:1 widescreen with both Dolby 5.1 and original mono sound, and the film looks pretty good for its age.  No subtitles.  Extras consist of a trailer and a chummy commentary with Craven and producer Peter Locke, which appears to be from an earlier release since they thank Anchor Bay at the end.  The two offer lots of good behind-the-scenes info including how difficult it was to secure an "R" rating due to the film's graphic violence and disturbing themes.

I was pleasantly surprised by how much I liked THE HILLS HAVE EYES upon seeing it again after so many years.  What Craven and Locke accomplished on this trip into the desert with their low budget, small crew, and limited resources remains an impressive achievement that rises above other films of its ilk to provide chilling, suspenseful, and freaky fun.

 

THE HILLS HAVE EYES (1977) -- DVD Review by Porfle

SPACE PRECINCT: THE COMPLETE SERIES -- DVD Review by Porfle

 Originally posted on 12/10/10

 

Looking like a kiddie show but playing like a futuristic primetime cop series, Gerry Anderson's SPACE PRECINCT: THE COMPLETE SERIES (1994-95) may take an episode or two for members of its target audience to realize what they're watching.  I didn't really like it myself at first, but boy, did it ever grow on me.

Despite its Saturday-morning look, SPACE PRECINCT is a sci-fi variation of the traditional hardboiled cop show complete with sexuality, violence, and other adult themes.  Familiar cliches abound, but with a subtle satirical edge that never veers into farce or self-mockery.  The characters and situations are always realistic enough to be taken seriously even though the show itself is one big, elaborate elbow in the ribs.

Ted Shackelford plays Lt. Patrick Brogan, a former NYPD cop who's now part of the 88th Precinct, which happens to be in orbit around the distant planet Altor.  Brogan's a devoted family man and a good, honest cop, but he's not above bending the rules a little when the situation calls for it.  His main beat is gritty metropolis Demeter City, a bustling hotbed of crime and corruption that looks like something out of a bargain-basement version of BLADE RUNNER, complete with flying cars (known here as "hoppers"). 

Since this UK show is produced by the same guy who brought us "Thunderbirds", "UFO", and "Space: 1999", everything's done with obvious models and the hoppers zip around on wires, but that's part of the fun.  Once you get used to it, it looks pretty cool--in fact, the SPFX guys manage to pull off some awesome "car" chases and stage an endless number of entertaining crashes and explosions.  This model work often has an updated "Flash Gordon" vibe which tends to give my inner geek a real buzz.  (Some CGI does crop up occasionally, mainly in the outer space shots.)


 

Down on ground level, the life-sized inner city sets are appropriately grimy and foreboding as lowlifes lurk in the shadows and crime runs rampant.  Here we find the main draw of SPACE PRECINCT--a variety of wonderfully designed aliens sporting some of the most lifelike, expressive animatronic masks I've ever seen.  The movements of the eyes and facial muscles in conjunction with the actors' performances creates a stunning effect which really makes these characters come alive despite a certain "cartoony" quality. 

In addition to its human population, Demeter City's two main alien races are the Creons and the Tarns.  Creons resemble gnarly versions of E.T. with big wide-spaced eyes and prunelike skin, and comprise most of the city's blue-collar element.  Tarns are somewhat more streamlined in appearance and sport a third eye which gives them limited telekinetic and mindreading abilities.  With Demeter City serving as a melting pot for the surrounding star system we also get to see a wide variety of other alien species with similarly ingenious design.

Back at the precinct, Brogan's cocky but capable young partner Jack Haldane (Rob Youngblood) is forever trying to break through the romantic defenses of beautiful Officer Jane Castle (Simone Bendix, who looks just plain awesome in uniform).  Her partner, Aurelia Took (Mary Woodvine), is a sensitive, soulful Tarn who uses her third-eye powers as an interrogation aid.
 

 

Buddy cops Orrin and Romek are a couple of likable Creon sad sacks who provide much of the comedy relief, while another Creon, Captain Rexton Podly (Jerome Willis), is the stereotypical gruff, hardnosed boss with a heart of gold.  ("Sometimes," Podly philosophizes in one episode, "reality takes a hammer to your dreams and smashes the hell out of them.")  Rounding out the group is a diminutive robot named Slomo who actually manages to not be overly cutesy.  On the homefront, Brogan's strongwilled wife Sally (Nancy Paul) and tweener kids Matt and Liz provide moral support and also feature prominently in several storylines.

While Shackelford, Youngblood, and Bendix are talented enough to give their thinly-drawn characters sufficient depth and charm (Shackelford in particular is so good here that I've been forced to forgive him for being in "Knot's Landing"), it's those alien characters that I find so mesmerizing.  Brimming with personality, each is capable of expressing subtle emotions in closeup (Officer Took in particular), with surprisingly convincing results.  Although you never forget that they're actors wearing articulated big-head masks, the effect is never less than impressive.

Stories alternate between cop-show staples, "X-Files" strangeness, and pure sci-fi, sometimes in various combinations.  The wide-ranging array of plotlines include black-market organ harvesting ("Deadline"), a Terminator-like cyborg with its sights set on Brogan and everyone around him ("Time to Kill"), interspecies racism ("Hate Street"), and a new, highly-addictive drug that causes its users to spontaneously combust ("Flash").  Things get tense in "Body and Soul" when Brogan and his son Matt find themselves trapped in a derelict spaceship that's on a countdown to self-destruct.


 

"The Fire Within", a two-parter from late in the season, starts out on the dull side as Brogan and the gang investigate a shady fire-worshipping religious cult.  But part one ends with a bang and part two builds to a spectacular finale with movie-level thrills and suspense. "Deathwatch", another two-parter which brings the series to a close, features a deadly alien spore that threatens to wipe out all life on Altor.

"James Bond" alumnus John Glen directs several episodes of this flashy, fast-moving series, with a rousing musical score by composer Crispin Merrell.  British viewers will probably recognize more of the guest stars than I do--"Divided We Stand", for example, features Suzanne Bertish of the Royal Shakespeare Company.  Ray Winstone's name shows up in the end credits for the prison-asteroid hostage drama "Two Against the Rock" although he must've been playing an alien because I couldn't spot him.  Also appearing in various episodes are Burt Kwouk (THE PINK PANTHER series), Maryam D'Abo, ALIEN 3's Danny Webb, and Christopher Fairbank (BATMAN, THE FIFTH ELEMENT).

The five-disc DVD set from Image Entertainment is in 1.33:1 full-screen with Dolby Digital 2.0 sound.  There are no subtitles or extras.  Total running time for the 24 full-length episodes is 17 hours, 43 minutes.  Again, Simone Bendix looks awesome in uniform.

It's a shame this series didn't last longer, because it just gets better and better during its single season.  Kids may find the stories too grown-up, while many adults will initially be put off by its seemingly juvenile veneer.  But for the discerning geek who thinks a cross between "Jason of Star Command" and "Hawaii Five-O" sounds like a cool idea, watching SPACE PRECINCT: THE COMPLETE SERIES is like going to Disneyland and riding all the rides. 

SPACE PRECINCT: THE COMPLETE SERIES -- DVD Review by Porfle

DEAD SEASON -- DVD Review by Porfle

 

Originally posted on 7/25/12

 

With NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD, George Romero created a zombie mythology that just won't die.  Filmmakers are still adding their own chapters to the story and exploring various nooks and crannies of the scenario Romero set into motion over forty years ago.  The characters and settings may change, the timeframe may be updated, and the zombies may move a little faster sometimes, but we know that it all stems from that one night when a guy named Johnny taunted his jittery little sister in a gloomy cemetery with the words, "They're coming to get you, Barbara..."

DEAD SEASON (2012) is director Adam Deyoe's contribution to this sub-genre, and, like many of the others before it, it assumes we know the drill and need little or no exposition to get the ball rolling.  Thus, we join a former paramedic named Elvis (Scott Peat) already dodging "walkers" (the script, we learn from the commentary, was written before HBO's "The Walking Dead" popularized the term) in his search for food and shelter, and trying to hook up with a woman who calls herself Tweeter (Marissa Merrill) whom he's met over the airwaves. 

After a wild and woolly escape from over a hundred extras in some pretty passable zombie makeup, Elvis and Tweeter sail to an island off the coast of Florida (actually Puerto Rico) that they think is "walker-free."  It isn't.  The living inhabitants are a paramilitary bunch led by hard-ass Kurt Conrad (James C. Burns) whose philosophy is that if they don't "strip themselves down to the wires" they aren't going to make it.  This means being ruthless and totally unsentimental, and it also means that Elvis and Tweeter must make themselves useful to the group if they expect to eat or, in fact, live.

As in the better zombie movies, the constant menace of the living dead serves as a backdrop for intense interplay between the human characters, with Conrad's increasingly domineering behavior alarming the two reluctant newbies even as they try to fit in.  Elvis' medical skills are put to good use, especially in the treatment of Conrad's listless daughter Rachel (Corsica Wilson), the last link to his more human side.  Meanwhile, Tweeter joins the search and destroy team and gets to kill zombies which have overrun the island ever since a Dutch cruise ship sank nearby (which I thought was a pretty cool touch). 

DEAD SEASON brings lots of good ideas to the table and keeps things interesting most of the time, making up for occasional lulls by offering some surprising and sometimes shocking twists along the way.  While directing and editing aren't always slick, the low-budget film boasts several furious action sequences that are often grippingly suspenseful, in addition to some extremely dramatic exchanges such as the one in which Conrad springs his darkest and most dreadful secret on a stunned Elvis. 

Performances by the leads are exceptionally good, with James C. Burns playing good-guy/bad-guy Conrad to a tee and making us sympathize with his intentions even when his methods seem repellent.  Peat and Merrill are a great team as Elvis and Tweeter--even their brief lovemaking scene manages to convey a sense of erotic desperation rather than being merely obligatory. 

The unglamorous yet tomboy-attractive Merrill in particular shines as a female character who can handle herself impressively in action situations without simply being the stereotypical "strong woman."  Peat, on the other hand, is adept at letting his emotional side show through even when he's smashing zombie skulls with a sledge hammer.

The DVD from Image Entertainment is in 1.78:1 widescreen with Dolby 5.1 surround sound.  No subtitles, though closed-captioning is available.  Extras include a making-of featurette, deleted scenes, outtakes, and a trailer.  The cast and crew commentary track is fun while being casual almost to a fault--in fact, it sounds as though someone's absent-mindedly kicking the microphone during the whole thing. 

As you might expect, the human characters' fragile veneer of civilization begins to fall apart at the seams during the final act as their compound is overrun by zombies and all hell breaks loose.  Nods to Romero abound--some of the grisly gore setups are an obvious reprise of familiar horrors from DAWN OF THE DEAD--but the action-packed, richly character-driven DEAD SEASON stands on its own as a modest but worthwhile entry in the zombie mythos.  

 

DEAD SEASON -- DVD Review by Porfle

DINOSAURS: GIANTS OF PATAGONIA -- DVD Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 3/12/11

 

From the very first second of DINOSAURS: GIANTS OF PATAGONIA (2007), things pop, fly, and explode toward the viewer.  The "Ooh! Ahh!" effect of it all is somewhat lost watching the two-dimensional DVD version of this made-for-3D IMAX film, as I did, although it still retains much of its pictorial grandeur. 

Writer-director Marc Fafard's dinosaur documentary is filled with beautiful vistas of Argentina, where the oldest and largest dinosaur fossils have been found.  As Donald Sutherland's familiar voice lulls us into the story, we're taken back 65 million years to the point in which a comet the size of Mount Everest is about to slam into the Earth and spell doom for its inhabitants (in a scene similar to the opening of ARMAGEDDON).  We'll witness the dramatic extinction of the dinosaurs later on, but first we skip back in time even farther to the Early Cretaceous period, where we meet some of the largest animals ever to walk the face of the planet.  

The CGI used to bring these creatures to life isn't quite on the JURASSIC PARK level but it's better than most.  The film follows the progress of two main characters, Strong One the male Argentinosaurus and Long Tooth the female Giganotosaurus, throughout their lives as they search for food and struggle to survive encounters with various predators.  At one point Long Tooth and her hunting pack attack Strong One's Argentinosaurus herd but are no match for the huge beasts.  Several other species of dinosaur are seen along the way, including the ever-popular T-Rex and a flying pterosaur with a wing span of over twelve meters.



These colorful sequences help offset the dry narrative tone and the slower stretches in which we observe real-life paleontologist Rodolfo Coria at work uncovering the fossils from which much of this historical data is derived.  It's interesting stuff, of course, watching this diligent explorer about his meticulous work, but a bit of a letdown after the dinosaur scenes. 

Fafard takes his camera anywhere it can possibly go in order to capture dynamic views of Argentina's most primitive regions.  Dizzying POV shots glide slowly over the landscape, often directly into the frame.  The CGI dinosaurs are extremely well-integrated into these settings. 

The DVD from Image Entertainment is in 1.78:1 widescreen with English and French Dolby Digital 5.1 sound.  There are no subtitles.  In addition to trailers, the bonus menu contains a documentary entitled "The Lizard King" which is equal in length to the main feature and boasts a wealth of additional dinosaur information presented in a seriocomic style. 

While the non-3D DVD of DINOSAURS: GIANTS OF PATAGONIA may seem a little, uhh..."flat" compared to its stereoscopic counterpart--especially during the parts where we're watching people dig up old bones--the visuals remain very impressive and the CGI dinosaur footage is among the best I've seen.  

DINOSAURS: GIANTS OF PATAGONIA -- DVD Review by Porfle

THE KILLING JAR -- DVD Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 2/19/11

 

Stay away from out-of-the-way diners after dark, THE KILLING JAR (2010) seems to be telling us, since you never know what kind of desperate character may come walking in.  And if he looks like Michael Madsen, you know you should've skipped the pecan pie and skedaddled five minutes ago.

This tense thriller by writer-director Mark Young (SOUTHERN GOTHIC) is one of those single-location movies that could easily be performed as a stage play, which means that the focus is on character and dialogue.  Neither are very deep here, but they get the job done pretty well, mainly due to a capable cast. 

Amber Benson (BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER) plays weary waitress Noreen, who dreams of getting out of Silver Lake (where the tourists don't go anymore since the lake dried up) but works in a dingy diner for ill-tempered cook Jimmy (Danny "MACHETE" Trejo).  It's almost closing time on a hot night when news comes over the radio of four grisly murders not far away, with the ill-fated family's killer still at large. 

A likely suspect enters as Noreen is chatting with a mild-mannered traveling salesman named John Dixon (Harold Perrineau, "Link" of MATRIX: RELOADED and REVOLUTIONS) on his way through town.  The stranger is foulmouthed and surly, prompting local deputy Lonnie (Lew Temple, THE DEVIL'S REJECTS) to start Barney Fife-ing him.  This proves to be a bad move, and before long "Doe" is threatening his seven terrified captives with a pump shotgun and getting crazier by the minute.



Michael Madsen does a lot of glorified cameo roles these days, so it's good to see him sink his teeth into a part that's not all that different from the kill-crazy Mr. Blonde of RESERVOIR DOGS, only without the mordant sense of humor.  His "Doe" is scary dangerous in a wary, calculated way and when he goes off and gets violent, the character is coldblooded and unpredictable. 

Young, whose direction is efficient without drawing attention to itself, throws a few curves at us to keep the story moving.  These include the arrival of Mr. Greene (Jake Busey), a shady businessman who's there to meet a Mr. Smith, whom he's never seen before.  Is it Doe, or is Mr. Smith someone else in the diner?  It might even be trucker Hank (the always-fine Kevin Gage of HEAT and LAID TO REST). 

Young builds a fair amount of suspense as Doe singles out his captives one at a time to terrorize and interrogate them, and people do get killed badly.  Still, much of the drama is psychological, so don't expect a gorefest--aside from a couple of grisly shots here and there, you'll have to use your DVD players' frame-advance to see an exploding head or two.  While none of this is unbearably nailbiting and the major plot twists are fairly predictable, the finale is nicely played and ends the movie on a satisfying note.



The DVD from Image Entertainment is in 1.78:1 widescreen with Dolby Digital 5.1 surround sound.  A trailer is the sole extra.

THE KILLING JAR probably won't sear itself into your movie memory banks or have you swooning in cinematic ecstasy, but it's a solid little suspense thriller with some good performances and an absorbing story.  Best of all, it's a chance to see an aging Mr. Blonde at the end of his rope, going mental and getting trigger-happy one last time.  

THE KILLING JAR -- DVD Review by Porfle

HERSCHELL GORDON LEWIS: THE GODFATHER OF GORE -- DVD Review by Porfle

 Originally posted on 9/11/2011

 

An irresistible treasure trove of blood red Lewis-abilia, Image Entertainment and Something Weird Video's HERSCHELL GORDON LEWIS: THE GODFATHER OF GORE is just about the most absorbing and utterly delightful documentary that fans of the pioneering filmmaker could hope for.  Covering his entire career in exhaustive detail, we're treated to first-hand insider accounts along with a wealth of film clips, outtakes, press materials, and other goodies. 

"Part filmmaker, part carny" describes both Lewis and his longtime partner, producer/distributor David Friedman, who take an active part in the production and supply us with most of the behind-the-scenes information.  A teacher of English and Humanities, Lewis drifted into advertising before buying half interest in a film studio and making his first erotic exploitation film, "The Primetime" in the late 50s.  ("It wasn't the greatest film in the world," says Friedman, "but it had sprocket holes and could run through the machine.")  For his next one, "Living Venus", he discovered frequent star William Kerwin and a young Harvey Korman in a home economics film called "Carving Magic." 

Self-distribution led to screenings in burlesque houses, which then got Lewis and Friedman started making "nudie cuties" (which the documentary's co-director Frank "Basket Case" Henenlotter calls "the stupidest movies ever made.")  Russ Meyer's "The Immoral Mr. Teas" inspired them to expand these short films into nudist-camp features such as "The Adventures of Lucky Pierre" (shot for $8,000) with Lewis and Friedman serving as the entire film crew.



Just about any film or individual mentioned during the narrative is accompanied by clips and/or photos--even "Carving Magic" is briefly seen.  The first part of the film is a concise history of nudie cuties and nudist camp features in the 50s and early 60s, with generous feature clips and behind-the-scenes footage.  Even a nude and surprisingly fit Mal Arnold, who would later play villain Fuad Ramses in "Blood Feast", can be spotted in shots from "Goldilocks and the Three Bares." 

As the novelty value of these films began to wear off, Lewis and Friedman moved on to the next logical frontier of exploitation--gore.  Here we get into the real meat, so to speak, of the documentary, with detailed accounts of the making of "Blood Feast" (1963), "Two Thousand Maniacs" (1964), "Color Me Blood Red" (1965), and other horrors that were extremely shocking at the time and brought the ire of local censor boards down upon anyone connected with them.  Again, this segment is packed with highlights and outtakes from each film, with an enthusiastic Lewis speaking at length about what went on during production and Mal Arnold adding his own recollections about "Blood Feast"--which was shot in four-and-a-half days for $24,500.

Lewis non-gore efforts are covered as well, including the ripped-from-the-headlines "The Girl, the Body, and the Pill" and a delightfully lame rock'n'roll comedy called "Blast-off Girls" (both from 1967), which featured, of all people, Colonel Harlan Sanders of Kentucky Fried Chicken fame (who supplied the cast and crew with free chicken in return for some product placement).  We also see scenes from Lewis' director-for-hire film "The Magic Land of Mother Goose" and the outrageous bad-girl biker flick "She-Devils on Wheels."



Briefly flirting with a more mainstream appeal, Lewis made the less violent "A Taste of Blood" in 1967 before delving back into gore with a vengeance.  As is demonstrated by the numerous clips, films such as "The Wizard of Gore", "The Gruesome Twosome", and 1972's horrendous "The Gore-Gore Girls" (his final film, which featured legendary comedian Henny Youngman) are some of the most cheerfully depraved forays into graphic violence Lewis ever directed.

Despite his reputation, however, Lewis comes off as an earnest and personable guy whose excitement and sense of fun are infectious.  In addition to the talking head stuff (which in no way dominates the film) we see him at the home he shares with wife Margo and addressing a direct-market advertising conference, which is his current passion.  We also follow him and Friedman to St. Cloud, Florida, the location for "Two Thousand Maniacs", where they're warmly received by the town's current citizens (in a funny re-enactment of the film's opening scenes) and reunited with longtime junior partner Jerome Eden. 

Best of all, the film ends with Lewis appearing along with "Blood Feast"'s Mal Arnold and Connie Mason at the 2005 Chiller Theater Expo, where he performs a rousing rendition of his "Two Thousand Maniacs" theme. "Ya-HOOO!  The South will rise again!" he croons with boyish glee as the crowd goes wild.

Also appearing in the film are Lewis devotees Joe Bob Briggs, John Waters, and Frank Henenlotter, whose insights into the maverick filmmaker's career are invaluable, and a host of Lewis associates with extensive personal experience in the making of these films.  Lewis' son Robert gives us the lowdown on the fine art of squeezing an eyeball for the camera.  Actor Ray Sager enhances his comments with a spot-on Lewis impersonation, while cinematographer Steven Poster admits, "I don't know if I've ever actually seen one of his movies."  Andy Romanoff, who accurately opines that these films are memorable "for their lack of craft" and "because they're so terribly made", inspires this exasperated remark from Lewis: "The problem I had with Andy Romanoff was that he wanted to make a good movie!"



Fans of the great Bill Kerwin (probably best known as the star of "Blood Feast" along with the non-Lewis trash classic "Playgirl Killer aka Decoy For Terror") will be happy to discover much behind-the-scenes footage and information about this legendary actor.  In addition to "Carving Magic", we also get to see a scene from an industrial short which actually shows Kerwin involved in a happy, shiny song-and-dance routine.  Described as a hard-working, hard-drinking go-to guy who proved invaluable to Lewis on the set, Kerwin is showcased in footage from the unfinished "An Eye for an Eye", which was unearthed and partially assembled by Something Weird to give us an idea of what this lost film might have been like.

The DVD from Image Entertainment and Something Weird Video is in 1.78:1 widescreen with Dolby stereo.  No subtitles.  Extras include H.G. Lewis trailers (with taglines such as "It's tantalizing, titillating, and tantamount to tremendous!"), a Lewis nudie short entitled "Hot Night at the Go-Go Lounge!", and a photo gallery.  Best of all is a full hour of deleted material from the documentary, which is practically a whole extra feature in itself.  One of the highlights is the sight of Bill Kerwin punching out a plate glass window with his bare hands.

H.G. Lewis fans can't go wrong with HERSCHELL GORDON LEWIS: THE GODFATHER OF GORE, which captures the excitement of making underground films about forbidden subjects which shocked and horrified contemporary sensibilities.  As Lewis tells us, "That was the entire intent, to make something outrageous.  And in that respect, yes, we did succeed."  To which Friedman adds: "We had fun."


Buy it at Amazon.com
Read our coverage of the "Blood Trilogy" Blu-Ray collection

HERSCHELL GORDON LEWIS: THE GODFATHER OF GORE -- DVD Review by Porfle

TAPOUT: THE COMPLETE SERIES -- DVD Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 11/1/10

 

I was never interested in mixed martial arts, or "extreme fighting", because I always had the impression that it was simply an excuse for people to watch a couple of bozos in a cage beat each other to a bloody pulp.  Why should I be interested in that?  TAPOUT: THE COMPLETE SERIES (2007-2008) is an entertaining and informative answer to that question.

"Tapout" is what an opponent does when he's had enough and must submit by literally tapping the canvas.  It's also the name of the line of sports clothing and gear founded in 1997 by Charles Lewis, known as "Mask" because of his penchant for decorating his face with camo paint.  After a humble beginning that saw Mask selling his wares from the back of a car at local fighting events, the company grew to include his friends Dan "Punkass" Caldwell and Tim "SkySkrape" Katz and went on to make millions. 

The 20 episodes in this 5-disc set document the adventures of Mask, Punkass, and SkySkrape as they travel the country in their RV looking for up-and-coming fighters to sponsor in their first major MMA event.  Each episode follows his training and preparation as we and the Tapout crew get to know him and learn what makes him tick.  Then comes the climactic fight which rarely fails to be suspenseful and exciting.  With a mix of traditional boxing, kickboxing, wrestling, jiu-jitsu, and whatever else , the action is non-stop and the outcomes unpredictable.  And, contrary to my preconceptions, the violence hardly ever exceeds that of a regular boxing match (not by all that much, anyway).
 

 

That isn't to say that you won't find yourself getting a little squeamish on occasion.  Blood does flow, and there are times when a fighter is pummeled like a human punching bag.  You'll see guys getting elbow-bashed repeatedly in the face, and in the first episode one fighter's arm gets bent the wrong way, which had me cringing.  Aside from these instances, though, I found myself gradually appreciating the skills and strategy that each fighter brought into the ring--some specializing in the "stand up" (traditional boxing and kickboxing) and others concentrating on their "ground game" where wrestling and jiu-jitsu come into play.  Those who are equally adept at both usually come out on top.  (More often than not, surprisingly, the ground game is the deciding factor.)

The fighters are a diverse bunch of characters.  Some are troubled kids who would otherwise be headed down a path of gang violence and crime.  Others are struggling to better the lives of themselves and their families.  There's a SWAT cop, a cowboy from down on the farm, a guy who's getting back into the game after having his colon removed, and a mama's boy who wants to be a superhero. 

In one segment, the guys decide to sponsor their first female, Julie Kedzie, after being impressed by her workout in the gym.  In another, they must contend with a hostile young fighter who's at war with the world and everyone in it.  Little if any of the show seems staged, and there's none of the forced drama that infests most "reality" shows because none is needed--these characters and their stories are interesting enough as they are.

Speaking of characters, the Tapout boys are continually fun to watch as they travel the country and get into mischief at every turn.  Mask, whose hyena-like laugh is heard throughout each episode, is a loud, boisterous, and very likable bundle of energy with a childlike fascination with the world around him.  Highly outgoing, he uses his unorthodox social skills to make connections and help the fighters through any physical or emotional troubles they may have. 

At 6'7", SkySkrape is a strange sight in his big-hair wigs and novelty glasses, and serves as Tapout's main comedy relief.  In stark contrast is the diminutive Punkass, a strong, silent type who handles most of the company business and maintains a bemused deadpan during his companions' prankish antics.
 

 

It's fun watching these guys hang out at the various gyms and scout new fighters to sponsor, or simply take advantage of all the fun that can be had in each new location that they find themselves in.  This may include autograph-signing events, appearances on radio shows, or auditioning sexy bikini babes for their promotional photos.  On the flip side, we also see them staking a homeless fighter to three months' rent on an apartment (followed by three more if he keeps up his training), and generally going the extra mile for those less fortunate.  Behind all the clowning, they seem to be truly stand-up guys.

It all leads up to the big fight that usually takes up the last ten or fifteen minutes of each episode.  After each bout, Mask, SkySkrape, and Punkass offer their play-by-play analysis along with slow-motion highlights of the best moments.  The slam-bang action and the suspense of seeing if Tapout's chosen competitor is going to win each time are addictive, and I found myself watching all 20 episodes of this thoroughly entertaining series in just a few marathon sessions.  Needless to say, I now have a new appreciation for mixed martial arts and the athletes who participate in it.

The 5-disc collection from Image Entertainment is in full-screen with Dolby Digital stereo.  There are no subtitles and no extras.  The discs are stacked in a clamp-like device that I don't think I've encountered before, but after some careful thought I devised a clever method of getting the discs in and out without much trouble.

About halfway through viewing TAPOUT: THE COMPLETE SERIES, I discovered that Charles "Mask" Lewis was killed on March 11, 2009, in an auto accident involving a drunk driver.  In addition to being a major bringdown, the fact that I knew he didn't have long to live really forced me to watch the rest of the series in a whole new light.  Whether cutting up with SkySkrape in the back of their Tapout RV with the unflappable Punkass at the wheel, or mixing it up with old and new friends all along the way, Mask seemed to be having a ball living his life every minute of the day.  I guess this series is as good a way as any to remember him.

TAPOUT: THE COMPLETE SERIES -- DVD Review by Porfle

NAKED CITY: 20 STAR-FILLED EPISODES -- DVD Review by Porfle

 

Originally posted on 2/8/13

 

Like so many TV series of its time, the gritty cop drama "Naked City" (ABC-TV, 1958-63) now stands as a showcase not only for established stars working in television, but for the up-and-coming actors trying to break into movies (or at least bigger success on the small screen).  Spotting all these familiar faces is what makes Image Entertainment's 5-disc DVD set NAKED CITY: 20 STAR-FILLED EPISODES especially interesting to watch.

Sometimes upbeat, sometimes noirish and bleak, "Naked City" is a semi-documentary-style drama (filmed in black and white on real New York locations) that thoughtfully explores human foibles and social issues of the day between occasional bursts of violence such as a blazing shootout or tire-screeching car chase.  Not all of the stories are that interesting--in fact, they sometimes tend to drag or veer toward the maudlin--but at its best, the show can be scintillating and highly involving entertainment.

The first hour-long episode, "Sweet Prince of Delancy Street" (1961), features Robert Morse (HOW TO SUCCEED IN BUSINESS WITHOUT REALLY TRYING) in a manic performance as Richie, a schlub trying to keep his dad (James Dunn) from being arrested for vandalizing the factory he was just fired from and killing a security guard.  In addition to Jan "Madge the Manicurist" Miner and Arny Freeman of THE BRAIN THAT WOULDN'T DIE, a young Dustin Hoffman also appears in a smaller but ultimately pivotal role as Richie's friend Lester.

This episode (later ranked #93 on TV Guide’s list of "100 Greatest Episodes of All Time") introduces us to series regulars Paul Burke ("Twelve O'Clock High") as idealistic young police detective Adam Flint, Horace McMahon (ABBOTT AND COSTELLO GO TO MARS) as his world-weary boss Lt. Mike Parker, Harry Bellaver as his easygoing older partner Det. Frank Arcaro, and Nancy Malone as his faithful fiance' Libby Kingston.  The show's main emphasis, however, is usually on the guest characters and their problems, occasionally giving "Naked City" the feel of an anthology show. 

A brief glance at the episode titles such as "Robin Hood and Clarence Darrow, They Went Out With the Bow and Arrow" (with Eddie Albert) reveals how pretentious the series tends to be at times, as does a sample of the opening narration: "In the naked city, a man can search 10,000 side streets all 22,000 days of his life...and never come face-to-face with the stranger within himself." 

It's clearly intended as a showcase for writers and actors to allow free rein to their creativity and either shamelessly give in to excess or--in the case of old pros such as Albert, David Wayne ("The Multiplicity of Herbert Konish"), Claude Rains ("To Walk in Silence"), and Sylvia Sidney ("A Hole in the City")--do exceedingly impressive work.  

Some of the other future stars making early appearances include a wildly overacting William Shatner ("Portrait of a Painter"), Peter Fonda and Martin Sheen ("The Night the Saints Lost Their Halos"), Robert Duvall ("The One Marked Hot Gives Cold", "Hole in the City"), an emotional Dennis Hopper ("Shoes For Vinnie Winford"), Robert Redford ("Tombstone for a Derelict"), Jon Voight ("Alive and Still a Second Lieutenant"), "Jimmy" Caan and Bruce Dern ("Bullets Cost Too Much"), a willowy young Diane Ladd ("Line of Duty"), and Suzanne Pleshette ("The Pedigree Sheet").  Co-starring with Eddie Albert in "Robin Hood and Clarence Darrow, They Went Out With the Bow and Arrow" is a shockingly young-looking "Ronnie" (Christopher) Walken.

Already-familiar faces (at the time) from movies and television include Theodore Bikel, Barry Morse, Jo Van Fleet, Edward Andrews, Telly Savalas, Leslie Nielsen, Nehemiah Persoff, Paul Hartman, Jean Stapleton, Dick York, Johnny Seven, Betty Field, Peter Falk, Myron McCormick, Jack Klugman, Jan Sterling, Richard Conte, Nancy Marchand, Murray Hamilton, Roger C. Carmel, Jack Warden, and Carroll O'Connor.  Two 1958 episodes, "Lady Bug, Lady Bug" and "Line of Duty", take us back to the show's initial half-hour format with original stars John McIntyre and James Franciscus. 

Sharp-eyed viewers will spot the occasional lowly bit player who would later go on to bigger and better things, such as Richard Castellano (THE GODFATHER), Sorrell Booke ("The Dukes of Hazzard"), Joe Silver ("You Light Up My Life"), Sylvia Miles (MIDNIGHT COWBOY), and Doris Roberts ("Everybody Loves Raymond").

The 5-disc DVD set from Image Entertainment is in the original 1.33:1 aspect ratio with Dolby Digital mono sound.  No subtitles or extras. 

Spotting the then-and-future stars in an older show like this is kind of like birdwatching, only (to me) a lot more fun.  It helps if the show itself is worth watching, which the sometimes gritty, sometimes overly weepy "Naked City" manages to be more often than not.  And as a wallow in old-school classic TV, NAKED CITY: 20 STAR-FILLED EPISODES is pure, unadulterated nostalgia.

NAKED CITY: 20 STAR-FILLED EPISODES -- DVD Review by Porfle

SLEDGE HAMMER!: THE COMPLETE SERIES -- DVD Review by Porfle

 

Originally posted on 12/8/11

 

Having just watched the 5-DVD set SLEDGE HAMMER!: THE COMPLETE SERIES, I find that, once again, I dislike something at first and then end up liking it after further consideration.  This proves either one of two things: (a) I'm wishy-washy, or (b) you can't always go by first impressions.  I'm going to go with the second alternative, since it's less uncomplimentary toward me.

I have a vague memory of seeing an episode of this show during its first run (1986-88) and dismissing it as a crappy "Police Squad!" wannabe.  That criminally brief 1982 series (six big  episodes and out) by the Zucker brothers, which introduced Leslie Nielsen's celebrated "Frank Drebin" character and inspired the NAKED GUN movie trilogy, continued the same outlandishly farcical yet totally deadpan vibe of the Zuckers' AIRPLANE! on a smaller scale. 

Naturally, I was disappointed when I approached "Sledge Hammer!" expecting it to be more of the same.  What I finally realized after watching several episodes, however, is that this show is its own addlebrained entity--it's still a lightheaded farce that often resembles something out of MAD Magazine and celebrates silliness for its own sake, but the deadpan humor is shot through (pun alert!) with heaps of pure, giddy goofiness.  In fact, "Sledge Hammer!" works both when it's aping the bone-dry "Police Squad!" comedy style and when it's making funny faces at us.



It takes awhile to get its groove on, though.  The first episode is a bit of a mess--production values are murky, the direction and editing are flabby, and, worst of all, there's a laugh track pointing out the funny parts to us.  Still, it has John Vernon (ANIMAL HOUSE) as the mayor, who demands that Sledge be let loose on the case when his daughter is kidnapped by terrorists. 

There are some funny bits and Hammer's character, who is a cross between Dirty Harry and his watered-down TV equivalent "Hunter" (also a likable fascist cop with a female partner), is well established when he uses a bazooka to demolish an entire building in order to stop a sniper ("Trust me, I know what I'm doing" is his oft-heard motto).  Overall, though, it's pretty limp.

We get to watch the show get its bearings and start firing on more cylinders as the season progresses, with the scripts getting funnier and more daring, and the direction improving (Bill Bixby eventually helmed eight of the series' best episodes, with Dick Martin of "Rowan and Martin's Laugh-In" contributing a couple of good ones).  Despite its lesser moments, there's a relentless quality to the hot-and-cold-running gags and a sort of earnestness from the stars that makes the first season somehow likable.  And some of the gags actually score big laughs, as when Hammer and an informant (guest star Dennis Fimple) conduct a secret conversation via adjoining pay phones.



Before long, the chemistry between Hammer and his female partner Det. Dori Doreau starts to click.  RUNAWAY's Anne-Marie Martin (who, incidentally, co-wrote TWISTER with Michael Crichton) is an appealing foil for Hammer even though her comedic skills take awhile to develop, and their relationship has a certain charm--Doreau sees the good behind Hammer's fascist, violence-loving, ultra-right-wing exterior and eventually finds herself falling for him even though Hammer's first love is his gun, which he talks to and sleeps with. 

As Hammer, David Rasche (BURN AFTER READING, UNITED 93) has a firm grasp on the character from the start but also gets better as he goes along.  Rasche has a field day in the role, with his trigger-happy detective shooting first and asking questions later while gleefully roughing up everyone from jaywalkers to the mayor's wife.  He reels off one-liners like nobody's business--when a nagging reporter asks if he has any predictions, Hammer's deadpan response is, "Yes...scientists will perform the first brain transplant, and you'll be the recipient."  We eventually learn that Hammer thinks the death penalty is too lenient, his favorite song is "Taps", and the only thing he fears is world peace.

As season one comes to a close, just about the time Patrick Wayne does a delightful guest shot as Hammer's long-lost brother, the show really starts getting serious about being funny.  The season-one cliffhanger is insane, opening with a introduction by Robin Leach in which he announces that the series is making a bid for renewal by packing more sex and violence into the upcoming episode and ending with Hammer frantically trying to disarm a nuclear warhead that could annihilate the entire city.  Cult star Mary Woronov plays the mad villainess in this one, which actually does end with a nuclear explosion. 

How they resolve this open-ended situation at the start of season two is undoubtedly one of network television's nuttiest moments, with the show even changing its name temporarily as part of the joke!  And this is just the beginning of a series of episodes that get progressively more willing to be weird, while cast and crew all seem to be on the same page at last and making funny things happen.  Movie spoofs dominate, with films such as SHAMPOO, JAGGED EDGE, and VERTIGO getting the treatment (with the occasional misfire such as a weak parody of PLAY IT AGAIN, SAM). 

"Hammeroid" finds Hammer seriously wounded by a juggernaut robot (which is reminiscent of a similar character on the cult series "The Avengers") and turned into a cyborg a la ROBOCOP.  Fans of that movie should love this affectionate spoof, while Bela Lugosi fans are in for a treat with "Last of the Red Hot Vampires", in which "Love Boat" alumnus Bernie Kopel does a surprisingly good Lugosi imitation.  (The episode is "dedicated to Mr. Blasko", the actor's real last name.)



In "Jagged Sledge", Rasche gives a tour-de-force performance when Hammer must defend himself while on trial for the murder of a mob boss (the great Tige Andrews of "Mod Squad" fame).  Another episode, which finds Hammer going undercover as a prison convict involved in a breakout attempt, actually beats NAKED GUN 33 1/3 (1994) to the punch with a strangely similar premise.

Harrison Page (CARNOSAUR) is undoubtedly the funniest supporting actor in the role of Captain Trunk, a dead-on spoof of the perpetually screaming squad captain whose blood pressure is always sky-high thanks to Hammer's destructive hijinks.  Avoiding what could've been a one-note performance, Page is one of the best things about the show and is a constant delight.  In addition to those already mentioned, a sterling roster of guest stars includes Ronnie Schell, Bill Dana, Nicholas Guest, Ray Walston, David Clennon, Armin Shimerman, Richard Moll, Adam Ant, Brion James, Bud Cort, Mark Blankfield, and Russ Meyer regular Edy Williams.  Directors Bixby and Martin pop up in cameos.

The 5-disc DVD (22 episodes) from Image Entertainment is in 1.33:1 widescreen with Dolby Digital mono.  No subtitles or extras.

It's interesting watching a show go from blah to good as we see with SLEDGE HAMMER!: THE COMPLETE SERIES.  It may not be perfect but it's just plain fun, and by the time the last few episodes rolled around, I didn't want it to stop being Hammer Time. 

SLEDGE HAMMER!: THE COMPLETE SERIES -- DVD Review by Porfle