CAESAR AND OTTO'S PARANORMAL HALLOWEEN -- DVD Review by Porfle

 

Originally posted on 11/7/15

 

Petulant, petty, puerile, cowardly yet arrogant, incredibly vain, and prone to violent temper tantrums, struggling would-be actor Caesar Denovio is once again the "Ren" to lovable slob Otto's "Stimpy" in their latest laugh-packed horror comedy, CAESAR AND OTTO'S PARANORMAL HALLOWEEN (2015). 

As the hapless half-brothers, Dave Campfield and Paul Chomicki first hit the screen in a reality TV spoof that was aptly titled CAESAR AND OTTO.  After that, they veered into slasher territory with CAESAR AND OTTO'S SUMMER CAMP MASSACRE and CAESAR AND OTTO'S DEADLY XMAS while paying homage to classic horror in the short films CAESAR AND OTTO IN THE HOUSE OF DRACULA and CAESAR AND OTTO MEET DRACULA'S LAWYER. Here, they're back in action facing more supernatural perils in their most fast-moving mashup of the horror genre yet. 

The story starts off running with a hysterical spoof of HALLOWEEN that SCARY MOVIE wishes it had thought of.  In addition to the ghastly sight of Caesar and Otto dressed in drag so that they can score high-paying babysitter jobs, we also get a jab at Dr. Phil thrown in for good measure.  And this is before the credits have even rolled.

Before long the boys find themselves house-sitting for highly unpopular governor Jerry Grayson (series stalwart Ken MacFarlane, THE MILLENNIUM BUG) in a dream mansion that seems too good to be true.  What the governor fails to mention is that it's haunted.  I mean really, really haunted.

This is just the jumping off point for director and co-writer Campfield to start lampooning every fright flick from THE SHINING to PARANORMAL ACTIVITY to INSIDIOUS to THE AMITYVILLE HORROR.  THE EXORCIST is given its due when the boys' roguish dad Fred (Scott Aguilar) shows up and gets possessed (actually, it turns out he's just extremely drunk) which draws the questionable involvement of priests Sean Whalen (LAID TO REST) and Deron Miller (SUMMER CAMP MASSACRE, DEADLY XMAS). 

As usual, rank silliness is elevated to a sort of rough-hewn art form in this installment of the ongoing series, with sharp editing and a cartoon-like pace giving it the giddy feel of a live-action Looney Tune.  The gags are non-stop with barely a breath between them, and most of them score (if not a guffaw, then at least a knowing titter). 

Production values, while still not quite on the level of a Spielberg film, are the most lavish for an entry in this series.  This is probably Dave Campfield's best work as a filmmaker so far (although his first film, the serious thriller DARK CHAMBER, continues to impress). 

Besides its inventive script, the film's main strength is a cast that many indy filmmakers would die for.  Scream queens Tiffany Shepis (BONNIE AND CLYDE VS. DRACULA), Debbie Rochon (THE THEATER BIZARRE), and Brinke Stevens (JONAH LIVES) are on hand along with SLEEPAWAY CAMP's Felissa Rose and Beverly Randolph of RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD. 

Vernon Wells (THE ROAD WARRIOR's iconic "Wez") shows up as an axe-wielding psycho in a creepy old 8mm film the Denovios discover in a hidden room.  Rising stars JamieLee Ackerman and Josephine Iannece make an impression as the mansion's mysterious cook and gardener.  And as the titular non-heroes, Campfield and Chomicki just might be the greatest comedy duo since Abbott and Costello.

The DVD from WildEye Releasing is in anamorphic widescreen with 2.0 sound.  No subtitles.  A wealth of bonus features include two commentary tracks (one with Campfield, Ackerman, and Iannece, the other featuring Chomicki and other cast and crew), a gag reel, a tribute to the late Robert Z'Dar, trailers, behind the scenes videos and podcasts, and the delightful "Son of Piggyzilla" trilogy of shorts about everyone's favorite giant carnivorous guinea pig. 

Several cool Easter Eggs can also be found on the various menus.  Click on everything!  (I'm even mentioned in one of them!)

All the slapstick gore and goofy thrills you expect from a Caesar and Otto flick, and then some, are lurking in the delirious CAESAR AND OTTO'S PARANORMAL HALLOWEEN.  So check it out, but beware--you just might die laughing. 

Official Trailer

CAESAR AND OTTO'S PARANORMAL HALLOWEEN -- DVD Review by Porfle

Which Looks Dumber: "THE GIANT CLAW" or "REPTILICUS"? (video)

Two of the silliest-looking creations in horror movie history...

...are the jerky marionette monsters of "The Giant Claw" (1957) and "Reptilicus" (1961).

But which looks dumber? You decide from the trailers...


I neither own nor claim any rights to this material.  Just having some fun with it.  Thanks for watching!

Which Looks Dumber: "THE GIANT CLAW" or "REPTILICUS"? (video)

"THE PICTURE OF DORIAN GRAY": SEVEN REVEALS (Screen Adaptations of the Novel by Oscar Wilde) (video)

"The Picture of Dorian Gray": Seven Reveals

"The Picture of Dorian Gray" (1945): Hurd Hatfield
"Golden Showcase: The Picture of Dorian Gray" (1961): John Fraser/ makeup by Dick Smith
"The Picture of Dorian Gray" (1973): Shane Briant
"The Picture of Dorian Gray" (1976): Peter Firth
"The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen" (2003): Stuart Townsend
"Dorian Gray" (2009): Ben Barnes
"Penny Dreadful" (2014-16): Reeve Carney

I neither own nor claim any rights to this material.  Just having some fun with it.  Thanks for watching!

"THE PICTURE OF DORIAN GRAY": SEVEN REVEALS (Screen Adaptations of the Novel by Oscar Wilde) (video)

GHOST OF GOODNIGHT LANE -- DVD Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 5/26/14

These days, when you see that a movie has Billy Zane in it, you never know if he's going to actually apply himself or just wander through it until somebody hands him a check.  Maybe it says something for his latest flick, the Dallas-based spookfest GHOST OF GOODNIGHT LANE (2014), that he seems to muster up what comes as close to a performance as you're likely to see from him in something not on the same sea level as, say, TITANIC.

Here, Billy not only displays his best deadpan sense of humor but even wears funny hats as Alan, the crotchety head honcho of a no-budget production facility that churns out crappy movies.  Next to the larger building which houses his soundstage, there's a little old house which is used for editing and other post-production work.  A little old house that's--as Alan and his crew will discover--is haunted.

No time is lost setting things up.  Familiar actor Richard Tyson, who played the bully in THREE O'CLOCK HIGH and also shows up in such films as BLACK HAWK DOWN and BLACK WATERS OF ECHO POND, is the first to die when he's left alone in the house one night to finish editing a sequence and runs afoul of what appears to be a freaky-looking young female ghost who seems very agitated and very angry.  I watched this part right before going to bed, and yes, it did give me the creeps.

After the messy business of  his demise is dealt with (the police rule it an accident) Alan and the rest apply themselves to finishing their latest piece of crap as ominous storm clouds gather around the studio.  We meet his makeup girl Dani (the eternally cute Lacey Chabert), music and sound guy Amin (Lynn Andrews III), fill-in editor/janitor/Dani's boyfriend Ben (Matt Dallas, BEAUTY & THE BRIEFCASE), and the resident needs-a-shower loser Johnny (Adam Whittington), who runs the camera while lusting after actresses such as the plastic-enhanced blonde bimbo Laurel (Christine Bently Quinn).

Creepy-quirky little ghostly pranks occur all morning as you-know-who displays her mischievous side,  while Alan tries to shrug it all off in order to keep everyone from running out on him.  This is made more difficult when Thelma (Allyn Carrell), a weird old lady who claims to have once lived in the little house, suddenly shows up and reveals the whole story of who the ghost is, why she's there, and what she plans to do.  And it ain't pretty.

The movie continues in this vein until finally genre superstar Danielle Harris (HALLOWEEN series, CYRUS, BLACK WATERS OF ECHO POND, CHROMESKULL: LAID TO REST 2, THE VICTIM) as Chloe shows up with fellow thespians Micah (the also-cute Brina Palencia) and musclebound himbo Nico (the not-so-cute John Franklin) to get the ball rolling on what turns out to be the funniest part of the film, the big funky dance scene.  We get to see Alan the director at work here as he urges his performers to be ever more sexy and then foists product placement items upon them in the form of Uzis and "Muscle Milk" health drinks.  ("Muscle Milk" is actually mentioned in the closing credits, making it a genuine product placement item.)

With all this out of the way,  it's finally time for GHOST OF GOODNIGHT LANE to stop farting around and start bringing on the scary, which it does in a big way when the ectoplasm finally hits the fan around the midway point.  Despite all the tongue-in-cheek humor (which continues to amuse even after things get really serious) the story takes a deadly turn involving some pretty effective scares along with wince-inducing violence (one actress is confronted by the decaying, gibbering ghost and is made to slice herself to ribbons with pieces of a broken mirror) and just-plain "WTF?" moments such as one character suddenly flying around the room in fast motion and banging into walls until he's finally sucked through a trapdoor in the floor. 

Director and co-writer Alin Bijan (BELLS OF INNOCENCE) fills the movie with so many shocks both big and small that some of them can't help but score while others fall flat.  (In addition to which, this gang of idiots seems to specialize in sneaking up on each other and going "Boo!")  The ghost, whom we'll come to know as "Carly" (Sophia Arias), is a direct descendant of the stringy-haired young dead girls dressed in rags from such films as THE RING who appear several yards away at first and then instantly jut into screaming close-up, while moving around in jittery, jerkily-edited fast-motion.  One such instance caught on camera made me laugh out loud when budget-conscious Alan remarks, "Was that CGI?  I did NOT approve that."

Before it's all over, we get more cringeworthy instances of self-mutilation (one involving a spinning fan blade), some strange supernatural anomalies, spooky bedroom and bathroom-type scenes with dolls and mirrors, a possession-enhanced catfight (Lacey Chabert punching out Danielle Harris goes on my mental keeper reel), and a bad-CGI-slathered finale.

The DVD from Inception Media Group is in 16x9 widescreen with 5.1 surround sound with English subtitles and closed-captions.  A trailer is the sole extra. (Don't miss the final scene which appears after the end credits have already started rolling.)

At least we get a different set of stereotypes here besides the usual jocks, nerds, and camp counsellors (although there's no shortage of bimbos and horndogs), and the whole thing just kind of ambles along in an agreeable way until some quite watchable mayhem perks up the second half.  And with Billy Zane seemingly enjoying his time spent filming GHOST OF GOODNIGHT LANE, we get to see him actually invest part of his talent into his performance while remaining his casual, Zane-y self.

GHOST OF GOODNIGHT LANE -- DVD Review by Porfle

DEATH PASSAGE -- Movie Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 2/10/17

Red flag: teenagers running around in the woods at night, being menaced by an unseen, err...menace!  Sounds like potential run-of-the-mill generic "dead teenager" fodder, except this time--saints be praised!--it isn't.

Far from the gormless norm, in fact, is the 2015 Australian thriller-chiller DEATH PASSAGE (originally known by the considerably less evocative title "Lemon Tree Passage"), which, while not exactly all-out terrifying, is a shudder-inducing exercise in "eerie."

When three American tourists meet a couple of native Aussies on the beach, the five fun-loving teens share ghost stories around the campfire. One chilling tale involves an unfortunate soul run down one night by careless young joyriders at the crossroads of Lemon Tree Passage, his ghost now said to take the form of a bright light which follows any auto speeding down the dark roadway.

Naturally, they can't resist trying it themselves, and almost immediately the light appears.  Further investigation of the phenomena, however, elevates the situation from a lighthearted lark into a grueling ordeal of terror and death.  Which of course is bad for them, but good for us.

We can see right off the bat that director David Campbell's feature debut is going to be technically well-done, and the script dispenses with the usual stereotypical characters and willfully dumb dialogue in favor of a bit of realism for a change. 

The characters are pretty basic, including Americans Maya (Jessica Tovey, TRACKS, ADORE), her friend Amelia (Pippa Black), and Amelia's younger brother Toby (Tim Pocock).  Australian Geordie (Tim Phillipps), who catches Maya's eye, is pleasant enough, and even the resident "overweight funny guy", Geordie's pal Oscar (Andrew Ryan), is likable enough and doesn't pee on the campfire or light his farts.

The one wild card in this deck, seemingly, is Geordie's weird brother Sam (Nicholas Gunn).  We know Sam is bad news because the film opens with him being haunted by a malevolent supernatural presence which will show up again later while he's in the shower.  We don't know why he's being haunted, but it can't be good. 

Sooner or later, of course, things take a turn for the worst when the entire cast find themselves galumphing around in the pitch black forest at night, hearing far-off screams and seeing elusive lights flashing hither and yon. One by one, they either start to disappear or display strangely unexplained behavior as though possessed by a will not their own.

And this isn't just the usual stalker stuff packed with cheap jump scares.  Campbell and co-writer Erica Brien have a deviously twisty supernatural story to tell here, and they know how to wring all the creepy suspense and eerie atmosphere out of it. 

Things may drag a little at times or become a tad confusing here and there, but for the most part, that dark, foreboding forest becomes a theme park of fear with one dreadful surprise after another. 

After the final revelation comes, DEATH PASSAGE releases us from its cold, slimy grasp and lets us go about our way.  But until then, it's like a deluxe version of one of those creepy campfire tales that chill the blood and make us jump at every sound or movement that comes from beyond the flickering edge of the darkness.

DEATH PASSAGE -- Movie Review by Porfle