A BUCKET OF BLOOD -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle

 (Originally posted on 10/1/2019)

 

Fans of early Roger Corman films, especially those featuring the great Dick Miller, should welcome the arrival of Olive Signature Films' new Blu-ray release of Corman's seriocomic horror classic A BUCKET OF BLOOD (1959). 

Corman regular Dick Miller plays Walter Paisley, an insecure milquetoast who buses tables in a beatnik coffee bar but dreams of being a creative artist like pretentious poet Maxwell (Julian Burton) in order to impress his heartthrob Carla (THE WASP WOMAN's Barboura Morris).

Another Corman fave, the great Antony Carbone of THE LAST WOMAN ON EARTH, CREATURE FROM THE HAUNTED SEA, and PIT AND THE PENDULUM, is Walter's overbearing boss Leonard.

 

When Walter accidentally kills his landlady's cat, he covers the evidence with modeling clay and then shows off the result as his own artistic creation, garnering instant fame as a brilliant new talent.

But a hunger for greater recognition leads to murder when he whacks a gun-waving narc (future game-show host Bert Convy) over the head, killing him, and then turns him into a highly-praised clay sculpture as well. 

With more money and fame rolling in, Walter's trail of victims grows longer, eventually leading to Carla herself.

Olive's new Blu-ray release features a fine print mastered from a new 4K scan, with pristine picture and sound quality. The bonus menu is loaded with goodies which include:

    “Creation Is. All Else is Not” – Roger Corman on A Bucket of Blood
    “Call Me Paisley” – Dick and Lainie Miller on A Bucket of Blood
    Audio commentary by Elijah Drenner, director of "That Guy Dick Miller"
    Archival audio interview with screenwriter Charles B. Griffith
    “Bits of Bucket” – Visual essay comparing the original script to the finished film
    Essay by Caelum Vatnsdal, author of "You Don't Know Me, But You Love Me: The Lives of Dick Miller"
    Rare prologue from German release
    Super 8 “digest” version
    Theatrical trailer
    German theatrical trailer
    Gallery of newly-discovered on-set photography

 
If you liked 1960's THE LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS you should really be interested in this amusingly morbid tale which amounts to pretty much a dry run for the later film.  Besides also being helmed by Corman,  both were penned by Charles B. Griffith (DEATH RACE 2000), whose sense of humor seemed to play into the then-current appetite for beatnik culture and "sick" humor (the film's tagline is "You'll be sick, sick, sick--from laughing!")

Both feature typical be-bop musical scores by Fred Katz and similar production values (moody black-and-white photography, modest stage-like sets, a "skid row" ambience).   Carbone's bullying boss Leonard, just like flower shop owner Gravis Mushnik, first sees dollar signs from his employee's creative efforts but grows increasingly squeamish when he discovers the truth behind them.

Walter could be a first cousin of Jonathan Haze's Seymour Krelboyne,  another mousey shlub stuck in a dead-end job with an oppressive boss, who yearns to break out of his rut by doing something creative which will lead to murder.  We almost expect him to have a clinging, overbearing mother when he shleps back to his cheap apartment, and indeed his nosey landlady is played by Myrtle Damerel, who was Seymour's hypochondriac mom in LITTLE SHOP.

Barboura Morris, however, grounds the film by playing her role straight, and Griffith's script for BUCKET isn't nearly as whimsically farcical as the later story.  Carbone maintains a delicious deadpan even when Leonard's dazed reactions to Walter's bloodthirsty activities threaten to incapacitate him.

Other familiar faces include Ed Nelson as Bert Convy's undercover vice-cop partner,  Lynn Storey of LITTLE SHOP (she played "Mrs. Hortense Fishtwanger") as a curious square, and, as an art patron interested in Walter's work, the ubiquitous Bruno Ve Soto.

In the lead role that would define his career as a cult actor, Dick Miller wrings every nuance of nebbishness out of his pitifully desperate character and manages to remain likable even as his murderous tendencies spin out of control.  Corman's camera explores Miller's manic expressions with his own artistic eye and the collaboration results in a truly memorable performance.

A BUCKET OF BLOOD itself stands as a minor classic and a model of efficient, creative low-budget filmmaking as well as simply being a real kick to watch.


Buy it from Olive Films

YEAR: 1959
GENRE: COMEDY, HORROR
LANGUAGE: ENGLISH (with optional English subtitles)
LABEL: OLIVE FILMS
TOTAL RUNNING TIME: 66 mins
RATING: N/R
VIDEO: 1.85:1 Aspect Ratio; B&W
AUDIO: MONO
(This review contains excerpts from a previous review.)

A BUCKET OF BLOOD -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle

THEATER OF MR. & MRS. KABAL -- DVD Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 4/29/17

 

Walerian Borowczyk was a Polish avant-garde artist who chose film as one medium through which to express his wildly imaginative musings.  In 1967, he tackled the art of animation with the feature-length cartoon THEATER OF MR. & MRS. KABAL, aka "Théâtre de Monsieur & Madame Kabal" (Olive Films).

Or perhaps "tackled" isn't the correct term as much as "drugged, wrestled into submission, and dressed up funny."

With what appears to be a mix of cel art, cutouts, and other elements (at times it looks as though Borowczyk is drawing directly onto white paper in increments), he tells the story of a day in the lives of Mr. and Mrs. Kabal--he a short, mousey husband and she a tall, grotesque wife who appears to be a soulless mechanical monster of some kind.

The first scene catches her in the midst of assembling herself out of spare parts and choosing a head (after many tries, she picks the most alarming-looking one) before going along her un-merry way into what passes for a narrative, which actually isn't one at all.

Mr. Kabal, meanwhile, whiles away his spare time gazing around at the barren scenery through his telescoping binoculars until he catches brief glimpses of live-action women lounging in bikinis who are then menaced by an old man with a beard. These clips are the only color in this stark pen-and-ink world save for a few splashes here and there, including the ever-present butterflies flying endlessly about.

One sequence features the couple lying on the ground (he reading a newspaper, she lying face down) while the butterflies flit by for several minutes.  Some flutter, some flap, and others sound like trash can lids rolling by.

 

Borowczyk has a field day with the sound design throughout the film, as Mrs. Kabal foreshadows "Star Wars" robot C3PO with her staccato speech consisting of a barrage of electronic beeping noises. 

Borowczyk himself appears early on and urges her to simply act naturally (relatively speaking) so that we can observe the Kabals going through a typical day.  She beeps furiously in response (her dialogue is subtitled in three languages) before conjuring a weight out of thin air to drop on Borowczyk's head. 

The early scenes are the best, because they're slower paced and we can better assimilate what's going on, as nonsensical as it is, such as Mrs. Kabal shedding her outer metal husk in order to bath in the ocean, or Mr. Kabal attending a cinema show entitled "The Depths of the Human Body" which features live-action closeups of pulsating organs and a quivering esophagus.

In another scene, a giant crosscut saw separates Mrs. Kabal's head from her reclining body, which then expands to such great size that Mr. Kabal immediately scampers inside to explore the depths of its Escher-like interior.

As the film progresses, so does the pace, until we're assailed by a dizzying procession of utterly bizarre and senseless images that grow more relentlessly incomprehensible by the minute.  Finally the story is nothing more than pure stream-of-consciousness incongruity, and the effort to take it all in becomes rather taxing. 

For this reason it may be advisable to watch THEATER OF MR. & MRS. KABAL in several short bursts rather than trying to handle it all in one mind-numbing sitting.  The more adventurous cineastes among us may consider the latter something of a challenge, while others will be both unable and unwilling to endure more than a few minutes of it.

One thing's for sure--I would be very surprised if Terry Gilliam, who supplied the celebrated animations for "Monty Python" throughout his tenure with the group, weren't at some time influenced by Borowczyk's work, just as the Polish artist's later live-action film GOTO, ISLE OF LOVE seems to foreshadow the early stylings of David Lynch.   

The story of the Kabals is similar to GOTO in its arbitrary and thoroughly unapologetic strangeness for its own sake (or, rather, for art's sake).  But unlike that film with its more coherent plot and less rampant surrealism, the almost hallucinatory THEATER OF MR. & MRS. KABAL remains in the uppermost stratosphere of strangeness from beginning to end, like the long, fervid dream of a rarebit fiend, and dares us to still be there when it's finally done.

Tech Specs
Regional Code: region 1
Languages: French
Subtitles: English (optional)
Video: 1.33:1 aspect ratio; b&w + color
Runtime: 78 minutes
Bonus features: none

THEATER OF MR. & MRS. KABAL -- DVD Review by Porfle

GOTO, ISLE OF LOVE -- DVD Review by Porfle

 

Originally posted on 4/29/17

 

Polish artist Walerian Borowczyk began his film career with bizarre animated shorts and features, then applied his unique artistic sensibilities to live-action film with the amazing GOTO, ISLE OF LOVE, aka "Goto, l'île d'amour" (Olive Films, 1969).

I'm going to go out on a limb here and guess that this film was one of David Lynch's influences when he conceived his cult classic ERASERHEAD.  While GOTO isn't as overtly surreal as Lynch's work, it's so unremittingly odd, pictorially beautiful (in a perverse way, despite being a stark study in ugliness and decay), and meticulously rendered in gorgeous, finely-etched black-and-white that it exudes an almost intoxicating dreamlike quality during each moment it's on the screen.

Goto is an island where, due to some natural catastrophe, 90% of the population has been wiped out and the survivors exist in an almost primitive state in which they must make do with the crumbling remnants of their former civilization.  The people are governed by a military dictator named Goto (Pierre Brasseur) and live in the walled ruins of a fortress which, in better days, would have been condemned and demolished.

The story is fairly simple.  Petty criminal Grozo (Guy Saint-Jean) is pardoned by Goto and given three important responsibilities--taking care of Goto's beloved dogs, shining his and his beautiful wife Glossia's boots (a task Grozo savors since he's desperately in love with Glossia), and killing flies via several elaborate fly traps that he distributes daily around the heavily-infested fortress. 

Complications arise when Grozo discovers that Glossia (Ligia Branice) is having an affair with her horseback riding instructor, Gono (Jean-Pierre Andréani), with whom she plans to escape the island in a rowboat.  Grozo then puts his cunning little criminal mind to work to hatch a plan that will somehow rid him of both Goto and Gono so that he can weasel his way into the good graces of the henceforth unattainable Queen. 

While the story is an engaging one, what fascinates us about GOTO is the way Borowczyk executes it all as an artist creating a work of cinematic beauty out of the ordinary and at times repellant, the way a sculptor might use a scrap metal heap as raw material in welding together a makeshift masterpiece.
 

 

Each scene is filmed in formal, proscenium-arch wide shots dotted with cartoonishly-edited inserts, some in startling full color for emphasis (as when Grozo fantasizes about Glossia's boots or feeds the dogs luxuriously bloody hunks of raw meat).  Stark lighting eliminates all shadows, giving everything a blanched, almost too-real look.  Yet even without the shadows and wild camera angles, the visuals are somewhat reminiscent of German expressionism. 

Paint-peeling ruin and crumbling brick walls are the eternal backdrop of these people's lives, brightened only by rare artifacts which survived the catastrophe.  Scraps of fine clothing and other items are bartered for goods and services, even in the island's brothel where no money changes hands. 

The prostitutes are seen bathing communally in a nude scene quite titillating for 1969, as Grozo indulges himself while dreaming that he is with Glossia. They, along with some lovely shots of horses and a visit to the seaside (the boundary of Glossia's prison from which she yearns to escape), are the only respite from the film's grim tableaux of stagnant despair.

 

Inhabiting this world are characters all of whom are either rumpled military buffoons or destitute peasants risking extreme penalties (including the guillotine) to pilfer rotting apples that have fallen from the Governor's trees. Grozo himself is an engaging though ratlike little anti-hero, Glossia a flawed diamond in the roughest rough.  Even Goto has enough good qualities for us to empathize with him as more than just a tinhorn tyrant.  

Fortunately, GOTO isn't as depressing as it sounds since Borowczyk's bone-dry, deadpan sense of humor and keen mastery of the absurd keep us engaged in the most delightful and darkly enchanting ways throughout this otherwise hopelessly bleak tale. 

At times it's as though we're seeing the kind of distressingly odd world that illustrator John Tenniel created for "Alice in Wonderland" come to life, as strange and inescapable as a nightmare yet perversely compelling as well.

The DVD from Olive Films has an aspect ratio of l.66:1 with mono French sound and English subtitles.  Extras consist of the film's trailer, an introduction by artist and Turner Prize nominee Craigle Horsfield, and the lengthy featurette "The Concentration Universe: Goto, Isle of Love" featuring interviews with actor Jean-Pierre Andréani ("Gono") and several key crewmembers from the film.

GOTO, ISLE OF LOVE never fully engages us emotionally--it's just too odd, in both wonderful yet strangely off-putting ways--but we care when the story takes a classically tragic turn and ends on a haunting note.  Most of all, however, I enjoyed it as a stunning work of pure, joyful cinematic art.  Watching it is like creeping through a nightmare gallery in which the artist's fevered subconscious visions have achieved crude substance.

GOTO, ISLE OF LOVE -- DVD Review by Porfle

PANTHER GIRL OF THE KONGO -- DVD Review by Porfle

 

Originally posted on 1/19/22

 

Serials are a wonderful phenomenon unto themselves. They aren't self-contained units like movies or TV show episodes.  They're something that we watch in a different way entirely, with each open-ended chapter gradually adding up to a cumulative whole. 

And since the usually rather uncomplicated overall story must be sustained throughout these multiple chapters, it must necessarily be rambling, padded, stretched-out, repetitive, and filled with dead ends and shaggy-dog subplots.  (This is why so many serials have so easily been edited down into regular-length feature films.)

Because of this, serials seem to take place in their own unique, utterly unreal universe where actions are rash, dialogue is corny, the laws of physics don't apply, and logic as we know it simply doesn't exist.

Regarding the serial-like Saturday morning TV series "Jason of Star Command" I once said: "There's nothing like a show that's both stupid and cool at the same time to bring out the kid in me." This is, to me, a perfect summation of the appeal of the serial.  Since it's resolutely unlike anything else, it offers a whole different appeal and a refreshingly naive and uncomplicated kind of fun that's simply indescribable. 

Which brings us to PANTHER GIRL OF THE KONGO (1954), the latest classic serial to be released on Blu-ray and DVD by Olive Films.  The penultimate chapter play from Republic Pictures, who gave us THE ADVENTURES OF CAPTAIN MARVEL, it came near the end of the glorious serial era but still serves as a fun and exciting example of it.

The lovely and talented Phyllis Coates, who first played Lois Lane opposite George Reeves in the TV series "The Adventures of Superman", stars as Jean Evans, known as "The Panther Girl" by the local natives due to an earlier incident which has become legend.  Jean's profession as a fearless wildlife photographer makes her a bit of a female Carl Denham, who once boasted that he would've gotten "a swell shot of a charging rhino" if his assistant hadn't run away with the camera.

 

Here, however, the charging rhino is replaced by a "claw monster" created by Dr. Morgan (Arthur Space, THE SHAKIEST GUN IN THE WEST, THE RED HOUSE), a shady scientist operating in the area.  Morgan and his burly henchmen Cass (John Day, THE RELUCTANT ASTRONAUT, SILVER STREAK) and Rand (Mike Ragan, EARTH VS. THE FLYING SAUCERS, THE DAY THE EARTH STOOD STILL) have an illicit diamond mine but can't work it until the natives and other snooping interlopers have been run out of the area. 

To this end, Morgan has created a growth formula to turn crawdads--yes, crawdads!--into giant lobsters known as "claw monsters" which Cass and Rand then herd toward the village to wreak fear and havoc.  (And, potentially, one hell of a seafood dinner.) 

The whole thing's too much for even the intrepid Jean to handle by herself, so she calls upon the aid of her pal, big-game hunter Larry Sanders (Myron Healey, THE SHAKIEST GUN IN THE WEST, THE UNEARTHLY, RIO BRAVO) to come join in the hunt for the claw monsters and to help deal with Cass and Rand, who make quite a nuisance of themselves at the behest of Dr. Morgan.

Thus, we have the groundwork for 12 entire chapters filled with furious fistfights, blazing shootouts, jungle perils, and an ample serving of giant lobsters.  Sanders handles the frequent fisticuffs, with Jean usually falling and conveniently getting knocked out at the onset of each fight.  The shootouts are a different matter, as Jean wields a rifle or a pistol with equal skill. 

Each chapter ends, of course, with a cliffhanger, with Healey's character being the subject of a surprising number of them.  Most aren't all that imaginative, involving falling trees, exploding dynamite, quicksand, etc. but some end on a more exciting note with Jean being menaced by a giant lobster claw or an advancing gorilla-suit suitor. 

Phyllis Coates, who somehow looked appealingly MILF-y even in her 20s, makes for a fetching heroine when Healey isn't hogging the action limelight himself.  Many viewers used to seeing her in the prim 50s fashions Lois Lane wore in "Superman" will delight at the sight of Phyllis running around in her jungle miniskirt and boots for 12 chapters.  (She also sports a robust, chest-heaving scream that rivals that of the great Fay Wray herself.)

While much of the action consists of stock footage from the 1941 Frances Gifford serial JUNGLE GIRL, Phyllis gets ample opportunity to show off her character's derring-do when the usually self-reliant Sanders stumbles into a few sticky situations that require rescue by the Panther Girl.

In one scene she executes a thrilling high dive off a cliff to save the drowning hunter.  In another, she does a backflip off a swinging vine just in time to wrestle a crocodile that's about to eat him. 

Since this is a budget-conscious jungle adventure, the Republic backlot is pressed into service to stand in for darkest Africa, along with a standing town set, a simple native village, and a limited number of interior sets including the doctor's lab, the diamond mine, a saloon, and Jean's rustic jungle bungalow.

Special effects by the ubiquitous Howard and Theodore Lydecker (COMMANDO CODY: SKY MARSHAL OF THE UNIVERSE, JOHNNY GUITAR) include some cool rear-projection shots of those wonderfully hokey-looking claw monsters with Jean and Sanders blasting away at them in the foreground. 

The DVD from Olive Films has an aspect ratio of 1.37:1 with mono sound and optional English subtitles.  No extras.  The transfer is from a near-pristine print with beautiful black and white photography that's just a joy to look at.  (Note to subtitle writers: in 1954 it was "Miss", not "Ms.")

PANTHER GIRL OF THE KONGO probably wouldn't rank among the best serials of all time, but darn if it isn't one of the most downright fun and enjoyable ones that I've seen.  There's just something about these things--stupid, yes, but totally cool--that I find utterly irresistible.

PANTHER GIRL OF THE KONGO -- DVD Review by Porfle

THE MONSTER OF PIEDRAS BLANCAS -- DVD Review by Porfle

 

Originally posted on 9/13/16

 

I don't know how often your local stations showed it, but when I was a little Monster Kid back in the 60s I only got to see THE MONSTER OF PIEDRAS BLANCAS (1959) once.  So viewing the new DVD from Olive Films was literally only my second time to watch this modest but effective monster thriller from the tail end of the 50s creature-feature era.

Still, I always remembered it fondly, and I have a feeling a lot of lifelong Monster Kids also hold this seldom-seen gem in warm regard.  Partly because it's such an enjoyably low-key and earnest effort, but mainly due to its titular monster, a scaly, bloodthirsty, and extremely foul-tempered beast with a penchant for decapitating his victims.

Indeed, the most enduring images from the film, which many of us first saw in the pages of "Famous Monsters of Filmland" magazine, are those of the monster carrying around a bloody, realistic-looking severed head (as he does right there on the DVD cover itself).  This really piqued our morbid imaginations in those days since such graphic gore was still a novelty, especially on television. 

For the most part, however, THE MONSTER OF PIEDRAS BLANCAS is pretty standard stuff for a low-budget independent horror feature, though nicely done on all counts.  The simple story takes place in a small seaside town and centers around the lighthouse which is maintained by crabby old Mr. Sturges (John Harmon, FUNNY GIRL, MONSIEUR VERDOUX), who seems to know more than he lets on about the rash of mysterious, violent deaths occurring around town. 

While his attractive daughter Lucille (Jeanne Carmen) spends her school break with him and romances local boy Fred (the great Don Sullivan of THE GIANT GILA MONSTER and TEENAGE ZOMBIES) on the sly, Sheriff Matson (Forrest Lewis, THE ABSENT-MINDED PROFESSOR) and Dr. Jorgenson (Les Tremayne, WAR OF THE WORLDS) try to solve the mystery of the headless corpses popping up all over town.

Lewis, Tremayne, and Harmon, each of whom appeared in films both big and small, use their considerable collective acting experience to lend gravitas to the production.  As for the younger players--Sullivan is an old favorite of mine, even when he has his ukulele with him (his awful solo number in GIANT GILA MONSTER is the stuff of legend), and Carmen, a close friend of Marilyn Monroe who led quite a colorful life in showbiz, gives a likably restrained, earthy performance as Lucille. 

 

I like the smalltown ambience the film establishes--everyone knows everyone else and the phone numbers are only three digits long--as well as the unhurried pace that scripter H. Haile Chace and director Irvin Berwick (MALIBU HIGH, HITCH HIKE TO HELL) maintain until the monster's first shocking appearance jolts us out of our seats. 

After that, we get to see more and more of the reptilian beast until the film's exciting and suspenseful climax, which takes place atop the lighthouse itself.  The monster suit itself resembles a poor man's "Creature From the Black Lagoon" with much more grotesque features (similar to the fearsome alien in IT! THE TERROR FROM BEYOND SPACE), and is definitely a cut above the usual zipper-up-the-back job. 

The DVD from Olive Films is in 1.78:1 widescreen with mono sound.  Subtitles are in English.  No extras.  Picture quality is quite good.

If you don't have a warm spot in your heart for low-budget horror fare from the 50s, chances are THE MONSTER OF PIEDRAS BLANCAS will either leave you cold or put you to sleep, or both.  But if the very title puts a smile on your face while sending a pleasant little chill up and down your spine, then this soulful nostalgia fix should give you a potent buzz. 

THE MONSTER OF PIEDRAS BLANCAS -- DVD Review by Porfle

BREAKER! BREAKER! -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 3/11/16

 

I wouldn't have been caught dead going to a redneck trucker flick in 1977.  Or even renting it or watching it on HBO in 1988.  Especially if it had anything to do with CB radios, which I regarded with utter disdain.  Not only did I not see movies like CONVOY back in the day, but the C.W. McCall song itself made my soul hurt.

But that was then.  Now, in retrospect, I can enjoy a low-rent indy truck opera like Chuck Norris' BREAKER! BREAKER! (1977) as I bask in its retro-retro charm.  In fact, this simple little tale of good guys vs. bad guys and righteousness against injustice is such utterly unassuming and straightforward fun that its purity is practically bracing.

In only his first starring role, Chuck is hardly the fabled Superman he would later become although he can already spin-kick his share of butt.  Here, with his youth and lack of facial hair making him look a bit unformed, he's an easygoing truck driver who'd rather mind his own business than have to prove how tough he is.

 
But prove it he must when his younger brother, Billy, gets detoured through the small town of Texas City, California during his very first trucker run and finds out its one of those places where everyone is dishonest, especially the scummy police and the man who runs everything as mayor, judge, and whatever else he wants to be at any particular time--namely, the loathesome Judge Joshua Trimmings. 

The Judge is played by familiar character actor George Murdock (EARTHQUAKE, ANY WHICH WAY YOU CAN), who was born to play a smalltown tyrant in a baggy off-white suit.  (Not to mention God in STAR TREK V: THE FINAL FRONTIER.)  He convicts our hapless Billy of various cooked up crimes and sentences him to pay up or go to jail. 

Billy balks, gets beaten up, and disappears.  Cue big brother Chuck coming to town to rescue him and you've pretty much got the rest of the plot figured out.

The big rig angle actually comes into play only at the very beginning of the film and again for its finale, with most of the running time consisting of Chuck dealing with the local yokels (this is one of those Southern-like towns that seems to have been plunked right down in the middle of California) who are all either shining him on or trying to kill him.

Chuck, needless to say, handles himself capably but does so with a minimum of fancy fight choreography, making do with a well-placed spin-kick here and there in addition to some good old-fashioned fisticuffs.

Even the big fight at the end is kept fairly simple, save for lots of slow-motion a la "The Six Million Dollar Man." The mayhem tends to be on the lighter side, too, with nary a fractured limb or geyser of blood spewing from someone's mouth after a crushing blow.

Murdock, naturally, takes home the acting honors, while ERASERHEAD's Jack Nance gets to overact as a manic redneck trucker.  As for Chuck, his skills are pretty basic here--in one scene, it looks as though director Don Hulette filmed closeups of him expressing various emotions so that he could simply insert them wherever needed.  Of course, it's not like we really watch Chuck Norris movies for the acting.

As Arlene, a local woman and single mother who sides with Chuck against the town's corruption and becomes his romantic interest, Terry O'Connor is an appealing presence.  Their romance is quick and virtually without dialogue, with a brief, sappy ballad and a montage of them strolling around in the woods for a minute sufficing to encapsulate their courtship. 

The Blu-ray from Olive Films is in widescreen with Dolby 2.0 sound.  No subtitles.  The sole extra is the film's trailer.

With all of Chuck's trucker friends converging on the town for what might be called a "smashing" finale, BREAKER! BREAKER! finally breaks a sweat after pleasantly coasting along like a big rig on a downward grade for an hour-and-a-half.  It's hardly a blockbuster action thriller, but if you love the 70s, then movies like this are probably one of the reasons why.


Release date: March 22, 2016

Pictures shown are not taken from the Blu-ray

BREAKER! BREAKER! -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle

HOW TO STUFF A WILD BIKINI -- DVD Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 6/8/19

 

I've always loved the American-International "Beach Party" series, and I always will. This gives you a good idea of the overall tenor of my assessment of HOW TO STUFF A WILD BIKINI (Olive Films, 1965). As for WHY I love these movies so much, well...err...uhh...

To be honest, a lot of people will hate this movie and others like it, and, as far as they're concerned, rightfully so. It's a supremely silly slapstick sex farce with the lowest teen denominator in mind, and it was made to shower undiscerning audiences with brightly-colored pop culture confetti made up of whatever seemed like it might appeal to them, including girls in bikinis, bikes, surfing, jangly rock 'n' roll, cartoonish action, really corny jokes, and cameo appearances by faces familiar to both the younger and older generations.

All of which is why I find these movies to be such irresistible fun--because that's all they try to be, and in their own stupefying way, they succeed.  It helps if you're a fan of Frankie Avalon and Annette Funicello (I am), two of the most appealing young stars of the 60s, and enjoy occasionally turning off your mind, relaxing, and floating downstream. It is not dying, even though some might feel that way about it.

This time, Frankie's serving six weeks of naval reserve duty in Tahiti, separating him from Annette and tempting him to indulge in the local "social scene." Even so, he expects Annette (as "Dee Dee") to be faithful to him back there in Malibu, so he enlists the help of witch doctor Bwana Chicky Baby (none other than the venerable Buster Keaton, whose assistants include the beautiful Irene Tsu and Bobbi Shaw) to help him keep an eye on her with the help of a magical pelican. 

Bwana Chicky Baby also plans to divert the beach boys' attention away from Annette by creating the perfect woman, who appears to everyone first as an empty leopard skin bikini. The great John Ashley (HOW TO MAKE A MONSTER, FRANKENSTEIN'S DAUGHTER), an American-International mainstay doing beach duty for the studio, then gets to croon the title song before the bikini is suddenly filled by the gorgeous Cassandra (Beverly Adams).

In short order, a nattily-dressed Mickey Rooney and Dwayne Hickman show up as big business types looking for the "girl next door" to accompany Dwayne in a motorcycle race which Mickey hopes will improve the image of cyclists (an image that Eric Von Zipper and his bumbling biker gang do their best to sully when they show up and Eric falls in love with Cassandra).

Dwayne, against Mickey's wishes, falls for Annette, who plays hard to get as usual while the magic pelican keeps watch over their activities for the absent Frankie.  And thus the film's main action is established with lots of romantic complications and slapstick nonsense until the big bike race, which turns the final quarter of the film into a live-action cartoon that's like a cross between "Wacky Races" and "Road Runner."

This is the seventh film in A-I's "Beach Party" series (if you count "Pajama Party" and "Ski Party") and by this time the concept was starting to wind down. The next related films would be SERGEANT DEADHEAD and DR. GOLDFOOT AND THE BIKINI MACHINE, then one more "bikini" movie, the financial flop THE GHOST IN THE INVISIBLE BIKINI. After that, the emphasis would be on stock car racing with FIREBALL 500 and THUNDER ALLEY. 

But there's still fun to be had with this formula if it strikes your fancy as it does mine. Annette is just as appealing a fantasy girlfriend as ever, and gets to sing a couple of songs (one with The Kingsmen as her backup band) while fending off Dwayne Hickman's romantic overtures.

Rooney seems to be having a good time spoofing HOW TO SUCCEED IN BUSINESS WITHOUT REALLY TRYING (his character's name, J. Peachmont Keane, is a variation of that play's J. Pierpont Finch). He even participates in some of the many musical numbers that keep cropping up at the darndest times.

Most of the silliness comes from Harvey Lembeck's familiar Eric Von Zipper and his gang of "stupids", with "Seinfeld" regular Len "Uncle Leo" Lesser turning up as their cohort in crime, the evil North Dakota Pete.  The bike race finale throws any semblance of coherence or sanity to the winds, making the old Looney Tunes cartoons look like models of adult sophistication in comparison.

In addition to the great Keaton and Rooney, the film offers supporting roles and cameos from the likes of Brian Donlevy as Rooney's boss B.D. "Big Deal" McPherson and director William Asher's wife at the time, "Bewitched" star Elizabeth Montgomery, as (what else?) a witch. Frankie, by this time, was demanding more money and is relegated to just a few "Tahiti" scenes.  Annette, bless her heart, is just as wonderful as ever.

Will Dwayne and Annette win the big race instead of the devious Von Zipper and Cassandra?  Will Annette finally forget her vow to stay faithful to the unfaithful Frankie and give in to Dwayne's advances? Will the rest of the boys (including Jody McCrea's "Bonehead") forget hypnotic Cassandra and return their attention to the rest of the jealousy-inflamed girls? Will John Ashley sing another awful song? Will Mickey Rooney finish doing whatever it is that he's doing?

If you couldn't care less, there are probably a lot of other people who feel exactly the same way you do. I don't care that much myself, but as a lifelong beach movie lover, I sure do have a great time watching movies like HOW TO STUFF A WILD BIKINI anyway. It's the ultimate in light entertainment, and if you take it lightly enough, the rational part of your brain will enjoy the vacation.   


Release date: June 25, 2019

Rated : NR (Not Rated)
Region Code : Region 1/A
Languages : English (captions optional)
Video : 2:35:1 Aspect Ratio; COLOR
Runtime : 93 minutes
Year : 1965
Bonus: Trailer

HOW TO STUFF A WILD BIKINI -- DVD Review by Porfle

THE HALLELUJAH TRAIL -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 2/27/18

 

Comedy westerns are tricky to pull off, especially if you're trying to please both western fans and comedy fans.  BLAZING SADDLES did it by being a merciless no-holds-barred burlesque of sagebrush sagas that skewered all the familiar tropes in hilariously irreverent and farcical fashion.  BUTCH CASSIDY AND THE SUNDANCE KID succeeded by being delightfully witty while still delivering a genuinely gritty, slam-bang western that fans of the genre could appreciate.

What director John Sturges and company try to achieve with their sprawling comedy horse opera THE HALLELUJAH TRAIL (Olive Films, 1965) is no less than a spectacular blockbuster of epic proportions (with a running time of 165 minutes, no less) intended to inundate the viewer in an avalanche of eye-filling thrills and gut-busting laughter. 

As a sort of cross-country road picture filled with familiar faces and as much raucous action as he could squeeze out of an army of stunt people, it's as though Sturges were trying to come up with a western equivalent of the 1963 comedy free-for-all IT'S A MAD, MAD, MAD, MAD WORLD.

Unfortunately, the man who was so adept at serious all-star epics such as THE GREAT ESCAPE and THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN comes up short when applying his considerable talents to the field of comedy.  THE HALLELUJAH TRAIL blusters, bellows, wheezes, and beats its chest in a desperate effort to make us laugh with a furious flurry of thundering action and mugging slapstick that barely has a single genuinely funny line of dialogue or bit of business in its entire running time. 

The pseudo-solemn narration by John Dehner sets a mock-serious tone that never really goes anywhere, as he describes the impending disaster faced by an 1800s Denver, Colorado that is about to spend a long, hard winter with no whiskey.  That is, until freight tycoon Brian Keith orders forty wagon loads of the stuff to be delivered from back East across the desert through Indian country. 

Naturally, that much firewater is hard to resist for Chief Five Barrels (Robert Wilke), his comic sidekick Chief Walks-Stooped-Over (Martin Landau), and the rest of his thirsty braves. If you think Wilke and Landau are either convincing or funny as hooch-happy Indians, I have some oceanfront property in Idaho that might interest you.

The whiskey train also attracts the attention of a pretty, charismatic crusader against alcohol, the twice-widowed Mrs. Cora Templeton Massingale (Lee Remick), who vows to lead her fervent female followers to head it off at the pass while Colonel Thaddeus Gearhart (Burt Lancaster) reluctantly leads a regiment of cavalry soldiers to ride guard on the whole thing. 

Lancaster is all bullish bluster as Gearhart, with nary a corpuscle of comic talent in his whole brawny body but with a boxer's determination to pummel laughs out of the mirthless screenplay. Jim Hutton and Pamela Tiffin have the thankless task of playing his callow captain and rebellious daughter, who are in love, while stone-faced character actor John Anderson is a startlingly unlikely choice as his comic foil Sgt. Buell.  

As hymn-humming Cora Templeton Massingale, Remick is utterly eye-pleasing but about as appealing as the whelp she and Gregory Peck churned out in THE OMEN with her sanctimonious teatotalism delivered with a suffragette's zeal (a deadly combination) that had me despising her pushy, self-righteous character from the git-go. 

With striking teamsters on one side and boozehound Indians on the other--not to mention Cora and the ladies' anti-fun brigade--Brian Keith stomps and screams his way through the role of whiskey tycoon Wallingham, abetted by none other than an almost unrecognizable Donald Pleasance as a skinny, bearded frontiersman named "Oracle" who supposedly foretells the future when primed by offerings of free whiskey. 

Other familiar faces include Denverites Dub Taylor and Whit Bissell, Noam Pitlick as an Army translator who only knows English, Hope Summers, Val Avery, and Bing Russell (Kurt's dad). Elmer Bernstein provides the bombastic score.

Once the various groups converge on the trail to Denver, director Sturges stages a succession of overblown action sequences--one of them during a full-scale dust storm in which none of the various combatants can see each other--and packs them with shooting, limb-flailing stunts, racing wagons, thundering hooves, and other doggedly unfunny action as characters commit acts of artless slapstick against each other with a rubber-faced fury. 

All of which adds up to one long, joyless, tediously unentertaining western romp that wants to be funny so bad you can almost see it sweating from the effort.  Even with an overture, intermission, and exit music and a running time of almost three hours, not to mention some prodigious talent on both sides of the camera, THE HALLELUJAH TRAIL fails to muster as many laughs as a humble episode of "F Troop."

Rated: NR (not rated)
Subtitles: English (optional)
Video: 2.35:1 aspect ratio; color
Bonus features: trailer

THE HALLELUJAH TRAIL -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle

THE BELLS OF ST. MARY'S -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 11/20/19

 

Like its Paramount predecessor, "Going My Way", the RKO sequel THE BELLS OF ST. MARY'S (Olive Signature, 1945) was, to that point, the highest-grossing film for its studio. It's easy to see why it was and continues to be so popular, especially for war-weary audiences looking for something uplifting and inspirational.

Both films starred Bing Crosby as unconventional singing priest Father O'Malley, in this case having just been transferred to St. Mary's, an urban Catholic school presided over by nuns. 

Their leader, Sister Benedict (Ingrid Bergman), will establish a fond though often adversarial relationship with the easygoing but opinionated priest, especially in regard to the teaching of their young students.  In time, both their adverse methods as well as their personalities will begin to compliment each other.



Other subplots involve miserly old millionaire Mr. Bogardus (Henry Travers, IT'S A WONDERFUL LIFE) erecting a shiny new building next door and hoping to acquire the school itself to tear down for a parking lot.  Sister Benedict, meanwhile, prays constantly for the mean old coot to have a change of heart and donate the building as the new St. Mary's.

Meanwhile, a woman named Mary Gallagher (Martha Sleeper) implores Father O'Malley to take in her daughter Patsy (Joan Carroll) and give her the kind of secure, decent upbringing she alone can't manage.  Fatherless and withdrawn, Patsy's mental and emotional welfare becomes a major concern for the priest and nun, who will differ greatly  on how to deal with the troubled girl.

It's interesting how the Production Code-era writers clue us in on what's what when Patsy's mother hesitantly tells Father O'Malley she has "done everything she can" to support her daughter.

 

Also of note is O'Malley's warm, non-judgmental response, especially considering that Patsy was clearly born out of wedlock although the dialogue doesn't quite spell it out.  This single element alone elevates our opinion of the priest and of the film's benign intent.

While each subplot is vital, they sort of swirl around each other during the film rather than jostle for attention. There's a good deal of gentle humor to lighten things up along the way, beginning with the very first scene of Father O'Malley moving into his new boarding house as the housekeeper, played by the delightful Una O'Connor (BRIDE OF FRANKENSTEIN, THE INVISIBLE MAN) warns him ominously that the school's previous resident priest had to be carried away in a wheelchair in frightful condition.

Another wonderful scene occurs when the smallest children put on a nativity play. Here, director and co-writer Leo McCarey told the boy playing Joseph the general story of the play and then had him improvise the entire thing, telling the other castmembers what to do. McCarey then secretly filmed this and the result is a charming sequence which ends with the children gathered around a toddler playing Baby Jesus and singing "Happy Birthday To You."

At one point O'Malley and Benedict clash yet again over how to deal with a boy being bullied on the playground. O'Malley praises the victor for having what it takes to make it in a "man's world", while the sister takes it upon herself to teach the other boy, Dickie (Eddie Breen), how to defend himself after reading a book on the art of pugilism.

In what I consider to be the film's most amazing sequence, Bergman improvises a lively boxing lesson composed of several long, largely unedited takes. Keeping up a steady stream of banter about defense, footwork, bobbing and weaving, various jabs, and other tips, she conjures a magical moment for her character with a charm and spontaneity that I found utterly disarming.

With her classic beauty downplayed, Bergman has the chance to create this memorable character mainly through dialogue and presence. Der Bingle, of course, is his usual honey-smooth self, getting to croon a song or two along the way.  Though never getting particularly worked up over anything, his Father O'Malley exudes a gentle caring and empathy even when we may not agree completely with his methods.

The entire film has a noticeably reserved, restrained tone--even the humor often seems rather solemn.  We pretty much know right off the bat how each situation is going to work itself out, so we just settle in comfortably and watch it happen.

I found myself settling in quite a lot during the sweetly sedate THE BELLS OF ST. MARY'S. A bit corny and maudlin at times, it's genuinely heartfelt at its core and even evokes a few well-earned tears. McCarey's vision of a spiritually uplifting family entertainment is exquisitely rendered and, in this day and age, warmly nostalgic.



YEAR: 1945
GENRE: DRAMA
LANGUAGE: ENGLISH (with optional English subtitles)
LABEL: OLIVE FILMS
TOTAL RUNNING TIME: 126 min
RATING: N/A
VIDEO: 1.37:1 Aspect Ratio; B&W
AUDIO: MONO

BONUS FEATURES:
    Mastered from new 4K restoration
    Audio commentary by Bing Crosby biographer Gary Giddins
    “Faith and Film” – Sr. Rose Pacatte on The Bells of St. Mary’s
    “Human Nature” – Steve Massa on The Bells of St. Mary’s and Leo McCarey
    “Before Sequel-itis” – Prof. Emily Carman on the film in the context of Hollywood production history
    Screen Guild Theater radio adaptations
    Essay by cultural critic Abbey Bender

THE BELLS OF ST. MARY'S -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle