EVERGREEN -- Movie Review by Porfle

If I ever decide to put together my own dictionary, then the term "chick flick" may very well be accompanied by a still from EVERGREEN (2019).  Not only is this definitely not a movie that will ever be hosted by Joe Bob Briggs, but I would imagine it's potent stuff even for staunch aficianados of the genre.

Young lovers Gena (Amanda Maddox) and Paul (Tanner Kalina) get together in a beautiful cabin in the wilds of Colorado (one which, in the words of Richard Boone in BIG JAKE, "sure does bespeak of a great deal of money") to celebrate Christmas shortly before their planned wedding.

However, the observantly Catholic Paul insists on keeping things celibate before the vows, which rankles the amorous Gena, who even tries to take advantage of him when he's inebriated (and if I'm up-to-date on current mores, that's a big no-no).

So, robbed of her chance to have a super-sexy weekend, she insists they instead engage in a hot 'n' heavy game of "Very Personal Questions, Very Honest Answers", no-holds-barred edition. And as Arnold was fond of saying in THE LAST ACTION HERO: "Big mistake."

The rest of the film teases us with some light banter and a happy-fun montage or two before delving into the inevitable arguments, accusations, recriminations, disturbing discoveries, and other unpleasantries that we just knew we were going to have to slog through.

These are exacerbated by the arrival of Paul and Gena's former lovers Cassie (Olivia Grace Applegate, BLOOD FEST, THE FOX HUNTER) and Dylan (David Bianchi, BIRDS OF PREY), who, even in imaginary form and existing only in their own minds, give our main characters a chance to ruminate to an unhealthy degree on all the regrets and uncertainties which may very well drive a wedge between them.

Director and co-writer Joe Duca (HER NAME WAS JO) leans heavy on the melancholy while taking advantage of the beautiful, serenely desolate location (even the interiors glow with a warm natural light) and going easy on the stylistic affects.

As for the cast, I was impressed by the skill it took for Maddox and Kalina to act out these flaky characters and their massive amounts of emotional and sometimes maudlin dialogue with a semblance of naturalism. Many times such scenes come off like acting class exercises, but here the actors do a top-notch job of selling it all.

Of course, a whole weekend of just hashing things out in a hyper-emotional way amidst a backdrop of great environmental beauty will be manna for some, and to them I recommend EVERGREEN as a shamelessly indulgent wallow.  For me, however, it was, in its own way, one of the most profoundly depressing films I've seen since EDEN LAKE.