CURSE OF THE VAMPIRES -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 4/21/22

 

 (This Blu-ray disc is part of Severin Films' "Hemisphere Box of Horrors" Collection along with THE BLOOD DRINKERS, THE BLACK CAT/ TORTURE CHAMBER OF DR. SADISM, and BRAIN OF BLOOD.)


Somber and absorbing, with the old-school Gothic atmosphere of a classic horror film, CURSE OF THE VAMPIRES (Severin Films, 1966) is satisfying stuff for those who enjoy the spirit of the old Hammer vampire flicks.

Not as top-drawer as the early Hammers or as visually sumptuous, this earnestly-told vampire tale, shot in the Philippines with Filipino actors, takes advantage of its Spanish villa location for added production value as well as a fine cast and able direction by Hemisphere Pictures veteran Gerardo de Leon (THE BLOOD DRINKERS, TERROR IS A MAN, MAD DOCTOR OF BLOOD ISLAND, BRIDES OF BLOOD).

The stately pace allows us to appreciate every element of the story as it unfolds around two aristocratic Spanish families, with fervent lovers Leonore Escudero (Amalia Fuentes) and Daniel Castillo (Romeo Vasquez) denied permission to marry by Leonore's dying father.

 

He gives no reason for his denial, but we soon find out that there's a history of vampirism in the Escudero family.  Very recent history, in fact, since a hidden underground chamber contains the coffin of Papa's living dead wife (Mary Walter in a stunning performance).

Mama, it turns out, is a snarling, bloodthirsty vampiress who will eventually escape her captivity and start spreading her hideous disease amongst her own family members, one bloody bite at a time.

Leonore and her headstrong brother Eduardo (Eddie Garcia) clash over their father's dying wish that the house be burned to the ground upon his death.  Eduardo also butts heads with Daniel, a clash that is intensified when Eduardo turns into a vampire, attacks Daniel's sister, and then forces her to marry him.

The whole "family vampire curse" thing also leads Leonore to call off her own marriage to Daniel, further adding to the film's enjoyably rich sense of pure melodrama. How their story resolves itself leads to a satisfying conclusion that reminded me a bit of "Wuthering Heights" of all things.

It's all quite lively and suspenseful, yet CURSE OF THE VAMPIRES maintains its old-school atmosphere by holding back on the blood and violence while offering plenty of stunningly staged vampire action. 

Mary Walter makes a particularly effective vampire (closeups of her during the opening titles are chilling), while Garcia's Eduardo comes to the fore as the film's chief purveyor of undead villainy.

The print itself looks good, especially for an old Eastmancolor film.  Dialogue was filmed in Filipino and dubbed into English, with English subtitles available.  As usual, Severin Films offers a full menu of enjoyable extras which are listed below.   

CURSE OF THE VAMPIRES eventually finds Eduardo and his creepy vampire progeny beseiged by an army of crucifix-carrying townspeople in a final clash between good and evil.  For those who enjoy their vampire tales in the Hammeresque old-school style, featuring snarling, fang-baring bloodsuckers stalking the living amidst classic Gothic trappings, this is one you'll definitely want to indulge in.


Order the stand-alone disc from Severin Films

Order the Hemisphere Box of Horrors From Severin Films

Special Features for Curse of the Vampires:

    Cursed Vampire: Interview With Actor Eddie Garcia
    The Market Of Hemisphere: Interview With Marketing Consultant Samuel M. Sherman
    Audio Commentary With Philippine Genre Documentarian Andrew Leavold
    Partial Audio Commentary with Sam Sherman
    Deleted Scenes
    Trailer
    Beast of Blood / Curse of the Vampires radio spot

 

EATEN ALIVE -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle

 Originally posted on 2/10/18

 

Director Umberto Lenzi's gut-munching follow-up to his 1972 cannibal flick THE MAN FROM THE DEEP RIVER, 1980's EATEN ALIVE (Severin Films) is a deliriously deranged jungle tale in which a Jonestown-like religious cult in New Guinea is constantly menaced by a surrounding tribe of ever-famished cannibals.

One woman seduced into the cult, Diana Morris (Paola Senatore), is being tracked down by her concerned sister Sheila (Janet Agren, RED SONJA) with the help of tough guy Mark Butler (Robert Kerman, CANNIBAL HOLOCAUST, THE CONCORDE: AIRPORT '79, Sam Raimi's SPIDER-MAN), a Viet Nam deserter picking up extra dough working as a mercenary.

Thus, we go from a New York setting (where familiar actor Mel Ferrer appears briefly as an expert in primitive cultures) to the savage heart of the jungle where Sheila and Mark barely escape being devoured on their way to finding the secluded compound of charismatic cult leader Jonas (Ivan Rassimov, PLANET OF THE VAMPIRES).  Here, they discover Diana still alive but brainwashed by drugs and mental programming.

What follows is the usual "infiltrating the religious cult" stuff as the good guys plan their escape, which will mean evading both Jonas' henchmen and hordes of hungry savages.  But with Umberto Lenzi at the helm this will also involve softcore sex (mostly of the rapey and/or weird ritualistic variety), lots of gratuitous nudity, and, as is typical of this genre, some rather stomach-churning scenes of actual animal slaughter.

The latter includes the disemboweling of a large iguana after which its entrails are eaten (ditto for several snakes and small alligator as well). This is especially disturbing considering that the extras in these scenes seem to have been hired through a classified ad for carnival geeks.  Another unwelcome sight occurs when a small monkey gets sucked down headfirst by a python. 

On the cannibal front, the scenes of people getting chowed down on are a real treat for those who didn't think BLOOD FEAST went anywhere near far enough.  The effects are pretty decent and at times quite convincing. 

None of this has much to do with the story, but Lenzi seems to enjoy cutting away to such culinary exploits now and then to keep us entertained.  Arms, legs, entrails, and even sexual organs comprise the gory feasts as the film more than earns its title.

Meanwhile, we follow the progress of Sheila and her sister as Mark tries to get them out of Jonas' compound and into the jungle.  It's a case of "out of the frying pan and into the fire" when the religious zealots and the cannibals converge on them from both sides. 

The result is a frenzy of wildly improbable nonsense that's both eventful and, in its own way, quite engaging.  To top it off, Lenzi stages his own version of the real-life end of the Jonestown colony, with Rassimov's screwloose religious guru presiding over it with suitably wild-eyed fanaticism.

After a final blood-soaked atrocity or two, we end up back in New York for more Mel Ferrer (i.e., getting your money's worth out of the film's one big-name actor) and a twist ending that's oddly inconclusive.

Lovely blonde Swedish actress Janet Agren is winsome as Sheila, as is the darkly brunette Paola Senatore as her sister Diana, and those interested will delight in their numerous nude scenes.  It's hard to rate their performances, though, since everyone's badly dubbed (all dialogue is delivered in English and dubbed into English, Spanish, and Italian) and their characters in particular are saddled with some of the most cringeworthy "Southern" accents of all time.

Coming off better in that area is Robert Kerman's passable bad-boy mercenary act (sort of a poor man's Han Solo) and cannibal-film queen Me Me Lai as Mowara, a native girl who risks her life to help. 

Kerman may be familiar to some for his frequent appearances in vintage porn films such as DEBBIE DOES DALLAS and THE SATISFIERS OF ALPHA BLUE under the name R. Bolla.  His acting skills gained him parts in many adult features in which such talent was actually required. 

Umberto Lenzi's skills as a director are rather artless, yet workmanlike and briskly efficient.  The film itself looks and sounds quite good for a low-budget effort of this nature.  Location shooting in both New York and Sri Lanka add much to the production values.  

The screenplay is a hoot and dotted with several priceless lines, as when Jonas describes the cannibals to Mark: "Their idea of lunch is hot, fresh entrails soaked in blood.  But we keep their proteins limited."

The Blu-ray from Severin Films looks and sounds great for a film like this, and the disc's bonus menu is customarily stocked.  "Welcome to the Jungle" is an interview with Umberto Lenzi, followed by a feature-length tribute to the queen of cannibal movies, Me Me Lai.  There's an interview with production designer Antonello Geleng, and then a very entertaining dual interview with Ivan Rassimov ("Jonas") and Robert Kerman ("Mark"). Rounding off the menu is a 2013 Q & A with Lenzi from the UK Festival of Fantastic Films, and a trailer.  The Blu-ray's cover art is reversible (see below).

To assess a film such as EATEN ALIVE one must take into consideration the fact that some will regard it with utter delight while others will find it incomprehensibly appalling.  Those in the latter camp are advised to steer clear--waaaay clear--while the former should consider this review to be a hearty recommendation. 


Pre-order it at Severin Films

Available February 20, 2018


Reversible cover art:

SHOCKING DARK -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle

 Originally posted on 5/22/2018

"So bad it's good" has a new name, and that name is SHOCKING DARK (Severin Films, 1989), a mind-rotting Italian sci-fi/horror fever dream from director Bruno Mattei and writers Claudio Fragasso and his wife Rossella Drudi.

As Drudi admits in an interview included on the Blu-ray, she and Claudio were hired to pen a direct rip-off of James Cameron's ALIENS and TERMINATOR, which would be released to theaters in time to cash in on Cameron's own upcoming TERMINATOR 2 (in some countries, they even used the same title along with copycat posters).

The main difference here, besides the rock-bottom budget, is that Mattei's film is set in scenic Venice as well as a genuine nuclear power plant, complete with control room, endless hallways, and massive machinery surrounded by walkways.  It's a goldmine of found locations that add immeasurably to the production values. 

Not that this makes SHOCKING DARK look like a lavish or even competent effort. The film is laughably bad from start to finish, with subpar performances and some really poor dialogue (some of which is lifted right out of ALIENS), and the big, scaly creatures that menace our heroes aren't far removed from the ones that stalked THE HORROR OF PARTY BEACH.

And yet these very qualities are what make it such an involving experience.  The story is about a future Venice that's so polluted it's uninhabitable, and a research company called Tubular that's working to solve the problem when something goes terribly wrong (something involving monsters, that is) and all contact with them is lost.

Enter this movie's version of Cameron's colonial marines to venture into Tubular's vast underground system of corridors, laboratories, etc. and try to sort things out along with a brainy civilian, Dr. Sara Drumbull (Haven Tyler), who will be our official equivalent of Ripley.

Part of the fun of SHOCKING DARK is spotting all the other equivalents, such as the female marine who reminds us of Vasquez, other soldiers who remind us of other ALIENS characters, and the Newt-like little girl Samantha who latches onto Sara (even though the actress playing her appears to be far past adolescence).

Last but not least, there's the member of the group who is secretly a robot (or "replicant") and will eventually stalk Sara and Samantha through the compound like a Terminator as the familiar countdown to self-destruct ticks away. 

Whole scenes are copied, as when Samantha asks Sara, "Why do monsters exist?" during an intimate moment, right before they get locked in a lab with two of the slimy buggers while the traitor in the group turns off their surveillance camera.  Earlier, victims of the initial attack are, as you might guess, found cocooned.

Things don't really take off until the final third when all the stalking and counting down to self-destruct begin.  As a recorded voice reels off the elapsing seconds, Sara chugs through a series of Ellen Ripley/Sarah Connor moments until finally there's a rather unexpected time travel finale involving the one and only set built specifically for the movie. 
 
SHOCKING DARK is one of those movies that's sort of beyond criticism since the worse it is, the more fun I have watching it.  It's sincerely, almost creatively bad.  The filmmakers set out to entertain, and in their own colorful, flamboyantly inept, and wholly inadvertent way, they pretty much did just that.


Buy it at Severin Films

Special Features:
Terminator in Venice – An Interview with Co-Director / Co-Screenwriters Claudio Fragasso and Co-Screenwriter Rossella Drudi
Once Upon A Time in Italy – An Interview With Actress Geretta Geretta
Alternate Italian Titles

VIOLENCE IN A WOMEN'S PRISON -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle

 Originally posted on 4/19//2018

 

Not one of Bruno Mattei's more extreme works, nor even his most vicious "women in prison" film (THE JAIL: THE WOMEN'S HELL beats it handily on that count), VIOLENCE IN A WOMEN'S PRISON, aka "Caged Women" (1982) still manages to entertain thanks to the usual exploitation elements and some relatively outstanding moments.

The former, not surprisingly, includes plenty of sadomasochistic mayhem between butch female prison guards and their hapless prisoners, gleefully joined by a  monstrous warden and her sadistic club-wielding lieutenant.

Much nudity and softcore lesbian sex ensues, though I found most of it thoroughly unerotic.  Still, no women-in-prison exploitation flick is complete without indulging in such hijinks, and Mattei (directing here once again under the pseudonym "Vincent Dawn") delivers same with his usual rough-hewn panache.

This is also true for the obligatory gross-out stuff, especially when the new inmate (beautiful Laura Gemser in her signature role as "Emanuelle") is confined to solitary and attacked by slimy, ravenous rats. 

Mattei (MONDO CANNIBAL, ISLAND OF THE LIVING DEAD) likes to have three or four horrible things happening at once so that he can intercut amongst them for awhile, so we see Laura fighting off toothsome rats while guards molest other unfortunate prisoners and the wardens of the male and female sides of the prison engage in sick, voyeuristic sex games themselves.

We also visit the men's side of the prison where a gay inmate is constantly being gang-raped after his fellow prisoners get worked up watching one of the women exposing herself at a window.  These scenes usually end with a horde of guards descending upon the men in the exercise yard and beating them all senseless with clubs.

All of which takes place within an ideal found location--some kind of sprawling old European castle or something--that adds immeasurably to the film's atmosphere and production values.  An enthusiastic cast also adds to our enjoyment.

Getting there a decade before ALIEN 3, this movie also has Gemser waking up in the prison hospital being lovingly attended to by a handsome, sympathetic doctor who turns out to be a fellow inmate convicted of an unfortunate crime (in this case, the euthanasia of his cancer-ridden wife).

When it turns out that Laura may actually be working undercover to expose the horrific abuses at the prison, and is in danger of discovery, Dr. Moran (Gabriele Tinti) comes up with an escape plan that will generate ample suspense later in the film. 

While that's going on, however, the best moment in VIOLENCE IN A WOMEN'S PRISON occurs when an aging prisoner named Pilar (Leila Ducci), who's so lonesome she keeps a cockroach in a tiny makeshift cage as a pet, takes on the evil head guard after a bloody riot in the day room. 

For two minutes or so, the film raises to a level of greatness that had me in awe.  I had to rewind and watch it again, it was so riveting and exquisitely done.  In fact, it seemed as though Dario Argento and Alfred Hitchcock had dropped by that day for a visit and decided to co-direct a scene just as a lark.

Besides that, though, VIOLENCE IN A WOMEN'S PRISON is your standard Bruno Mattei effort, unpolished and very, very uncouth yet good fun for those who are up for this brand of cheerfully grotesque entertainment.


Buy it at Severin Films

Special Features:
Brawl In Women’s Block: Interview With Co-Director/Co-Writer Claudio Fragasso and Co-Writer Rossella Drudi
Archive Interview With Director Bruno Mattei
Radio Spot
Reversible Box Art


Reversible box art:

FLCL: PROGRESSIVE & ALTERNATIVE COMBO PACK -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle

(Warner Bros. Home Entertainment provided me with a free copy of the Blu-ray I reviewed in this blog post. The opinions I share are my own.)  

Originally posted on 1/27/20

If you like frenetic science-fiction-based anime with an emphasis on quirky teen relationships amidst a visual cacophony of robotic, city-smashing chaos, then Warner Bros. Home Entertainment's 2-disc Blu-ray FLCL: PROGRESSIVE & ALTERNATIVE COMBO PACK (Blu-ray+Digital) should keep you happily occupied for more than a few hours.

It's a two-season sequel to the original 2000 series about a wild young minx named Haruko who rides a Vesper and wields an electric guitar that doubles as a chainsaw, sledgehammer, and various other weapons and devices. 

Young people in her vicinity tend to suddenly sprout raging robot monsters from their foreheads, which Haruko gleefully engages in battle with the fate of everything and everyone around her in the balance.

Season two, FLCL: PROGRESSIVE, gives us an appealing new cast of typical middle-school teens of the kind that will be familiar to anime fans, including pretty but pensive Hidomi, her eventual love interest Ide, and his pals Mori and Marco. 

Hidomi is never without her headphones, which help block out the world around her, although they also have another, more mysterious purpose.

Into their everyday world blazes Haruko in the guise of a teacher, seducing Ide and drawing Hidomi under her influence to be used in bringing out inter-dimensional robot monsters for her to battle.

This time she has an alter ego in the form of super-cool Jinju, and they share a secret desire to somehow facilitate the return of a powerful being named Atomsk.

Meanwhile, weird things are going on in Hidomi's hometown, particularly a giant flat iron that's parked on the edge of town which will eventually be put into motion by a giant hand from above, mowing down and flattening everything in its path.

This all has to do with a struggle between two forces known as Medical Mechanica and Fraternity, agents of which are at work trying to either cause or prevent various disasters from occurring.

But for all its sci-fi sound and fury, the likable teenage characters are what give FLCL its heart and maintain our interest.  Even as the story charges irrevocably toward its catastrophic finale, the emphasis is as much on Hidomi, Ide, and their friends, whose interpersonal relationships we follow even as they begin to play key roles in the impending battle, as on the freaky warrior chick Haruko and other combatants.

FLCL: ALTERNATIVE continues with the return of Haruko, still on her no-holds-barred quest for whatever (it ultimately doesn't really matter), and a timid, insecure young girl named Kana who continually seeks acceptance from her close circle of female friends, each of whom has her own problems. 

But even as Haruko somehow stumbles into the role of mentor for this young girl, she also uses her potential mind powers to kick-start Armageddon all over again, this time on a level more cataclysmic than before.

If all this sounds complicated, it's because it is.  In fact, I pretty much gave up trying to keep up with all the different plotlines and such, and just started holding on for dear life as this dizzying succession of eye-candy animation and swirling, surreal imagery went rushing by like a river of watercolors.

Most impressive are the intricate, exquisitely-rendered artwork and full animation, which looks just like traditional cel animation but with digital enhancements.  Character design is semi-realistic for the most part but full of cartoony manga-like silliness and exaggerated reactions, all of which adds to the fun.

As for the battle sequences, the artists and animators let their imaginations run wild with some of the most surreal and dazzling imagery you're likely to see in a series of this kind. The combination of such startling visuals with the sometimes childlike, sometimes mature story themes remains compelling throughout.

Both seasons offer satisfying final episodes, yet FLCL: PROGRESSIVE & ALTERNATIVE COMBO PACK ultimately leaves the door open for more adventures of guitar-slinging wild girl Haruko and another hapless group of youthful protagonists enduring the vagaries of adolescence while caught in a colorful clash of powerful opposing forces.



BLU-RAY COMBO PACK SPECIAL FEATURES

    The Making of FLCL: Progressive & Alternative: An in depth look behind the scenes featuring interviews with the cast and crew.
    Meet the Creators
    The Pillows
    English Voice Actors
    Production: Behind-the-Scenes

FLCL: ALTERNATIVE DVD SPECIAL FEATURES

    English Voice Actors
    Production: Behind-the-Scenes

COMBO PACK INCLUDES ALL 12 EPISODES

    RE: Start
    Freebie Honey
    Stone Skipping
    LooPQR
    Fool On the Planet
    Our Running
    Flying Memory
    Grown-Up Wannabe
    Freestyle Collection
    Pit-a-Pat
    Shake it Off
    Full Flat

DIGITAL
FLCL: Progressive & Alternative Combo Pack is available to own on Digital. Digital purchase allows consumers to instantly stream and download all episodes to watch anywhere and anytime on their favorite devices. Digital movies and TV shows are available from various digital retailers including Amazon Video, iTunes, Google Play, Vudu and others. A Digital Copy is also included with the purchase of specially marked Blu-ray discs for redemption and cloud storage.

BASICS
Blu-ray/DVD Release Dates: February 4, 2020
Blu-ray and DVD Presented in 16x9 widescreen format

BLU-RAY COMBO PACK
Price: $44.98 SRP ($52.99 in Canada)
Running Time: Feature: Approx. 264 min
Enhanced Content: Approx. 35 min
2 BD 50s
Audio – English (5.1)
Subtitles – English
UPC# 883929707584
Catalog#1000757643

FLCL: ALTERNATIVE DVD
Price: $19.99 SRP ($24.99 in Canada)
Running Time: Feature: Approx. 132 min
Enhanced Content: Approx. 10 min
2 DVD-9s
Audio – English (5.1)
Subtitles – English
UPC# 883929707577
Catalog# 1000757642

See our original coverage

PORFLE VS. PEOPLE WHO DON'T KNOW WHO LARRY STORCH IS

(The following is my tribute to the late, great Larry Storch, which I wrote many years ago and repost here in fond memory of him.)


"What the hell do you mean, 'who's Larry Storch?'"

"I mean I don't know who the hell Larry Storch is!  Who the hell is Larry Storch?"

Infuriating, isn't it?  If you're like me, and find yourself in this situation at least once a day, you can understand why there are so many sudden, unexplained attacks across America every day.  Chances are, it's someone who knows who Larry Storch is attacking someone who doesn't know who he is. 

Here's an example that may sound woefully familiar to you: several years ago I got set up on a blind date, and I gallantly called the young lady up in advance to verify the time and place where we'd meet--which, by the way, was a Denny's on Wilton Boulevard, since I wanted to impress her.  She asked me what I looked like, and I told her (again, wanting to impress her) that I resembled actor Larry Storch. 

"Who's Larry Storch?" she inquired. 

"What the hell do you mean, 'who's Larry Storch?'" I screamed, a volcanic eruption of blazing hot fury erupting like a million geysers from every fiber of my tortured being. 

"I mean I don't know who the hell Larry Storch is!  Who the hell is Larry Storch?" she persisted, incredibly unaware of her own utter stupidity.

"What are you, incredibly unaware of your own utter stupidity or something?" I shrieked, kicking the glass walls out of the phone booth that I was standing in and repeatedly smashing my body into the frame until the whole thing fell over into the street with a resounding crash.  "ARE YOU SOME KIND OF A TOTAL F**KING IDIOT?  GRRRRRRR!!!  By the way, that's the Denny's on Wilton Boulevard, not the one next to the bowling alley on Burton Street."

Well, she never showed up.  She was probably too embarrassed by her own utter stupidity to show her face, and you can hardly blame her, but she could at least have stopped by my house later for the obligatory blind-date sex that I have come to expect over the years.  I've never actually had sex on a blind date, of course, but I have come to expect it.  Anyway, it's just as well, because I found out later that she looked more like Larry Storch than I do. 

I guess one of the reasons that women who look like Larry Storch don't know who he is might be that people are reluctant to tell these women that they look like Larry Storch.  But that's still no excuse for never having heard of him.  Anyone who's ever watched an episode of "F Troop" or "Ghost Busters" should not only know who he is, but should in fact consider him to be one of the greatest human beings who ever walked the face of the earth, next to Robert Loggia and Ben Gazzara.  They should also know who Forrest Tucker is as well, since he co-starred in both of those series with Larry Storch. 

Well, I brought all of this up at a political fundraiser that I attended several years ago, in an attempt to liven up what I considered to be some pretty boring chit-chat amongst a gaggle of pseudo-sophisticates who were standing around sipping drinks and tittering a lot.  When the mayor's wife gaily inquired, "Who's Forrest Tucker?" I poured my drink in her face.  As I congratulated myself for my restraint, another total moron--I think it was the mayor--chimed in with, "How dare you!  And 'Ghostbusters' was a movie with Bill Murray in it, not a television series!" 

Again I held my temper, and responded by merely flinging the hors d'ouevres table over, drenching several people with caviar and other gooey, expensive treats.  But then, just as I was returning to my usual casual demeanor, I heard a voice say, "Yeah, and who the hell's Larry Storch?"  The next few moments are still a blur in my memory, but the next day there was a picture of me on the front page of the newspaper in which some quick-thinking photographer had managed to catch me in mid-air as I hurled myself at the governor with the crazed look of a kabuki dancer. 

My interest in politics continued when I later attended the Carter-Ford debate and, after furiously waving my hand for several minutes, managed to get called upon to ask the presidential candidates a question.  When the guy held the microphone up to my face I took a deep breath, cleared my throat, and asked, "How do you feel about Larry Storch?"  A perplexed Jimmy Carter smiled uncertainly and asked, "Who's Larry Storch?" 

Just as I was about to charge the stage and hurl myself at him, Gerald Ford responded confidently, "Larry Storch is the greatest actor who ever lived.  Perhaps even the greatest human being who ever lived."  Banging the podium to emphasize each word, he added, "I...love...Larry...Storch!" The audience erupted with unrestrained cheers and applause! Well, I did, anyway.  And I sure as hell voted for Gerald Ford that year.  Jimmy Carter won, though, and, as you might expect, my extensive campaign to have Larry Storch's Birthday declared a national holiday was totally ignored by the government of the United States of America for the next four years.  Talk about malaise.  That, and possibly the Iran hostage situation as well, resulted in Carter losing his bid for re-election.  Take that, Carter!  Betcha know who Larry Storch is now!  BWAH-ha-ha!!!

Well, I've cut down on my attacks in recent years.  Maybe because of the wisdom and maturity that come with age, or maybe because I was getting beaten up a lot.  But the realization that attacking people because they don't know who Larry Storch is might not be a good thing to do finally came to me as I was discussing future attacks with my trusted consigleri, Tom Hagen.  Tom, not a wartime consigleri, is often the voice of reason in contrast with my unrestrained hostility, as can be heard in the following exchange...

TOM: Now, former President Carter and the Governor of Texas are on the run. Are they worth it? And are we strong? Is it worth it? I mean you've won...you want to attack everybody?

PORFLE: I don't feel I have to attack everybody, Tom. Just people who don't know who Larry Storch is, that's all. Now, are you gonna come along with me in these things I have to do or what? Because if not, you can take your "F Troop", your "Ghost Busters", and your "Dean Martin Celebrity Roast" DVDs...trade 'em all in for Adam Sandler movies.

TOM: Why do you hurt me, porfle? I've always been loyal to you. I mean, what is this?

PORFLE: You're right, Tom.  I should stop attacking people who don't know who Larry Storch is.

TOM: Well, you should try to cut down, anyway.

HALT AND CATCH FIRE: THE COMPLETE FIRST SEASON -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle

 

Originally posted on 4/23/15

  

You don't have to be a computer whiz to appreciate "Halt and Catch Fire", the AMC series about an upstart electronics company in Dallas, Texas taking on monolithic IBM in a race to come up with the first portable personal computer. In fact, even the most borderline "tech savvy" viewer such as myself can find plenty here to be entertained by even as the geek-speak flies right over our heads.

Set in the early 80s (with RETURN OF THE JEDI still in its first theatrical run) Anchor Bay's HALT AND CATCH FIRE: THE COMPLETE FIRST SEASON captures the furiously competitive world of the burgeoning PC industry with ample amounts of drama and suspense. In this fictionalized account of real-life events, Cardiff Electronics boss John Bosworth (Toby Huss, JERRY MAGUIRE, COWBOYS & ALIENS) makes a fateful decision when he hires the brash and manically driven Joe McMillan (Lee Pace, THE RESIDENT, THE HOBBIT), an ex-IBM exec, as his head of product development.

Joe causes chaos by weeding out the less imaginative employees and channeling ever-increasing resources into building a faster, cheaper PC, one which weighs less than fifteen pounds and can be carried in a briefcase. Much of the show's watchability comes from seeing him plunge recklessly forward through any personal, professional, or financial crisis as though his life depended on it, with an almost sociopathic singlemindedness. Hints of his past, including an unfortunate childhood trauma and his ousting from IBM (John Getz of THE FLY will guest-star as his IBM exec father), make him even more of an ongoing mystery.

For his core team, Joe drafts hardware genius Gordon Clark (Scoot McNairy, 12 YEARS A SLAVE, BATMAN V. SUPERMAN: DAWN OF JUSTICE), an office drone still haunted by the inexplicable failure of his own brilliant innovations in the field (Joe recognizes his potential and reignites it by tasking him to reverse-engineer the IBM computer chip), and software savant Cameron Howe (Mackenzie Davis, BAD TURN WORSE), a punky, videogame-addicted college student who seems to have cut her teeth on writing computer code.

The big drama isn't just in whether or not they can come up with the technological breakthroughs they're striving for--they're also trying to do all of that without causing Cardiff electronics to go out of business, mainly due to legal actions brought against it by their monolithic competitor IBM. After reverse-engineering that IBM chip, the team must then come up with their own non-copyrighted version that will pass legal muster and do so before the company goes under.

Between Gordon's marital problems with wife Donna (Kerry Bishé), another tech head working for Texas Instruments, and the unhealthy sexual relationship between Joe and Cameron, the show features plenty of non-computer-related mischief that also manages somehow to be relevant in various ways to the ongoing professional intrigue. The characters are far from perfect and often display less-than-admirable traits, which makes them more believable and identifiable.

The 80s-era period atmosphere is good, although the Georgia locations don't convey much of a "Texas" vibe and neither do some of the less-than-authentic accents. (Guest stars Jean Smart and Texas-born Annette O'Toole are exceptions.) When the resident eggheads start spouting volumes of computer lingo at each other, it reminds me of the techno-gibberish used on "Star Trek: The Next Generation"--I don't really have to know exactly what it all means to appreciate its dramatic impact.

The entire season builds up to the big electronics sales convention in Las Vegas where the team goes to unveil their big gamble to their peers along with the rest of the world. Here, just when we think all is finally well and that a major victory is at hand, a shockingly unexpected and near catastrophic setback gets them scrambling into damage control mode again.

The 3-disc Blu-ray set from Anchor Bay (10 episodes, approx. 435 minutes) is in 1.78:1 anamorphic widescreen with Dolby 5.1 sound and subtitles in English and Spanish. Extras consist of three featurettes--"Remaking the 80s", "Rise of the Digital Cowboys", and "Setting the Fire: Research and Technology"--along with a brief behind-the-scenes look at all ten episodes. Also contained are instructions on how to instantly stream and download a digital HD ultraviolet copy of the series.

HALT AND CATCH FIRE: THE COMPLETE FIRST SEASON succeeds in taking something totally foreign to me and making it interesting. It's fun seeing all the dramatic stuff that went into the creation of this amazing invention that most of us take for granted every day.